I'm the type of girl that if I don't stand in front of a mirror I'm full of insecurities and I could be very self cautious
I'm the type of girl that loves to wear dresses and high heels but is afraid to fall or rip the dress
I'm the type of girl that doesn't like to be called girly but in all honesty is extremely girly
I'm the type of girl that will sound like a ***** when she is correcting your stupidity and then apologize
I'm the type of girl that will fall in love with a guy that won't even notice me
I'm the type of girl that will laugh at little things
I'm the type of girl that will try to make your day better even though you tried to destroy my world
I'm the type of girl that doesn't ask for much but honesty and love

stressing over a homework assignment that has absolutely no meaning and is complete *******
stressing over a guy who stares at me for the whole lunch hour but wont dare to say hello because of whatever reason and i dont know whether to make the initiave or not
stressing over wanting to rebel and scream at the top of my lungs and run away to a place that wont make me oh so satisfied
stressing over family on how obnoxious they can be but still being patient because i love them
stresssing over trying to make him notice me
stressing over wanting to "fit in" to some sort of crowd that doesnt exist
stressing over not knowing what i want to do for the rest of my life
stressing over not knowing whether id find that person to complete me

I love the way he stares at me without a tease
though I wish he had the ***** to talk to me
he only stares at me from a safe distance
I wish he stared at me face to face
I wish his friend didn't like me so things won't be so awkward if anything were to happen
I like his voice and the way he sneakly stares at me from his peripheral vision and looks away to secretly smile
I wish it wasn't so hard to talk to strangers I guess ill just take the initiative from here and see the possibilities

I want to create something beautiful that if I went into a coma and woke up not remembering a single thing I could look at what I've created and see beauty.

you say that I am beautiful
you want to spend every living day with me
you want to cuddle up next to me
you want to make love with me
you want to watch and show me your world
you want to listen to music with me
you want me to breath on you
you want to dance like silly kids
you want to hold my hand like lovers
you want to me to stay and not leave
you want all these things from me and you haven't even asked me I what I want from you.

will I ever be good enough for you? will I ever fill your silliness? your happiness? your sadness? will I fulfill your needs and wants? will you learn to love me? will I learn to love you?

and its just one of those things that could never leave me alone
words, sentences trying to figure out how to put it all in place so it could make sense to you
so you could read my sappy writing about a girl who puts her thoughts down before going to bed
and you could, but you dont have to, agree or feel anything and i know i am not as amazing as Charles Bukowski but i hope one day i am and i hope that this thoughts wont drive me crazy tonight