Always a sound of screaming and whisper,
Following,
But just out of sight.
Never letting me keep my head silent,
Just on the edge,
Holding me tight.

Their grasp,
Always slowly twisting my neck.
They’re desperate to show me a piece of myself,
A wall,
Stopping what I’d hate to believe.
My mouth spits out lies with nothing to give.

It’s so easy to break
An image,
A puzzle,
When my every thought has a reason for cracks.
I must keep in my mind
A notion,
A tunnel,
As I rip out a brick and let it collapse.

Never let them escape.

Always think,
Breathe,
Stop,
Now quiet.
Don’t say a word.
Don’t let yourself speak.
Hold these feelings I hate within reach of your heart.
You create them,
I conceal them.
You speak to yourself,
As if I’m trying to blame someone else
And that someone is still me,
More creature,
Less man.
So never let yourself break free,
For your every utterance will shatter the facade,
Consciously crafted to cage the unconscious.
I beg of you, fade away someday,
But for now, watch me,
The liar,
And spare me,
The victim.
Our victim.
My own self.

Take a moment to breathe,
Just make it quick.
It's never enough.

Rush what you can't achieve.
Nothing to pick,
No choice in this craft.

Take a moment to run.
Keep your distance
And never look back.

End what's never been done.
In this instance
No one sees the lack

Of your meaningless words.
Reasons now gone.
Stay hidden inside.

Take all that you ignored.
Leave with this dawn
And stop feeling pride
For staying a pawn,
For renting your time.

Still believing in what's been,
Not in that, which guides my eyes.
Not to end, but just begin
As the one, who always pries

Into shadows' lonely view,
Losing sight of what's myself,
Thinking "I'm what's left of you",
"Me" left on the highest shelf.

Far enough, not reaching out.
Far away and left alone.
Didn't know that I could doubt
Something I had never known.

Let yourself believe and change.
Stay beyond the length of touch.
Take this feeling, oh, so strange,
From this "me" that's so naive,
Because no one would believe,
That your leave can hurt so much.

Even within these tired flashes
Of another dying satellite,
I see these meaningless words calling
To some remnants of a flawless sight.

Soaring towards this dead horizon
Of another lying planetoid.
These visions fall within the fires,
That **** the ones trying to avoid

The light of the ones long forgotten,
Of another trying meteor,
Of nothing that has been a delusion,
Of the only thing that we tried for.

Keep my feeling within your own grasp,
Oh, another crying fallen star.
Turn what I said to nothing, but dust.
Run away to somewhere beyond far.

My steps echo in the silence of night,
As streets, empty, repeat what I say.
After a day of unspoken hours,
I make my way home, where silence continues.
Just think of tomorrow, next week, months and years,
But who'll think of seconds, insignificant time.
The clock will not leave behind any sound,
So I hear nothing, only delusions.
Nobody's waiting, pure darkness inside.

This place embodies my state of mind.
Is this solace, or just an illusion
Of cries for choice to which I am bound?
Free to move forward and stay in the line,
Just to distract yourself from these tears.
Calling the voice that's lost deep within you,
I keep up this act, my only prowess.
Still in these shackles of lying dismay,
As a faint smile appears in sight of light.

Landscapes of what's never been seen
Covering the light.
A silhouette shrouded by night
With shadows aloft.

Nothing, but these sights that don't mean
Anything, but fright
Of this creature - canvas so white.
Just don't peek too oft.

Brushes akin to knives so soft,
Piercing the painting.
Colors, on the brink of fainting,
Bleed out their essence.

Mountains of white, now cold and doffed.
A whisper echoes,
As someone calls for the meadows.
A shadow in need of a presence.

The touch of another burning embrace
Cannot melt these unforeseen feelings.
And calling forth this form of my being
Leaves but a rusty trace in my place.

This one of the few creating a spark,
Gather the light of a thousand Suns.
Fire, turn me into this form undone.
Let me become the one to be stark.

A breath of fresh air no one can define
Spreads dust and heat through these dark ditches.
As golden as all the world's greatest riches,
But only a fool could fall for this shine.

The train is passing through the fields,
Leaving a scent of the past behind.
It follows and nothing can shield
From this sorrow, so easy to find.
Let it go and see for yourself,
There's nothing to gain in this delve.

She calls to him, still believing,
That her words can someday be heard.
Clouds part, a look so deceiving,
As the skies cry to be spared.
A fragile bird flies far, to its home,
Where others will listen,
Where she's not alone.

In difference we stand,
Yet share the same mind.
This process of thought,
Belief of the blind.

Lying and crying,
Eyes of denying
See how our tears fly,
How they cannot speak.

Your memory caught
A feeling so bleak
That's lost in the sky
Of your body's end.

Someone's standing.
But where? Where?
Far. Oh, so far away from me.
Time is mending.

They're all begging,
In your care.
Lives. Oh, their lives you never see.
Your word, dreading.

Hear their crying.
Their dead stare.
Eyes, Oh, their eyes, piercing through thee.
You keep lying.

They're not asking.
They prepare.
Scars. Oh, the scars from which they flee.
Thoughts they're grasping.

I look at you,
Surrounding me,
As you stare in amazement.

You look for clues,
Explaining me,
You add another detriment.

He looks at you,
A friend of mine.
It's clear that we're the same.

I look at you
And, in your eyes,
I see the difference staring back.
The difference in our blame.

All I can do is try to make you feel better.
Feel wanted.
You and me,
Together.
But I can't help to see you look away,
Alone,
Without me.
But you don't have to explain.
I know how you feel.
I hope I do.
But it doesn't matter,
Whether I know or not.
My help is always here,
For you.
Just in case you need an ear.
In case you need someone.
I may not be what you want.
I can't achieve your perfection.
But if I can be what you need,
I'll be the light.
I'll listen forever.
For it's all I can do.
Everything I say fades away,
Consumed by eternity.
You acknowledge my voice,
Yet somehow it's left unheard.
But it's no longer my concern.
All I worry about are your words.
For when you share them,
They are no longer your secrets.
They ask me to help.
I ask and do all I can.
I can't be left just a listener.

I've fallen into this hole.
It's getting deeper with every word.
I try to escape,
But I know all my efforts are in vain.
You're not the one pulling me down.
It's all me,
Always will be.
The one who can't look at the bigger picture.
Who didn't realize the distortion on the water.
It seemed so shallow.
Shallow like I am,
When I keep running away.
I left you alone.
But is that all I could do?
Am I nothing?
Nothing,
But a listener?
My actions can't affect anything.
You acknowledge my voice,
Yet somehow it's left unheard.

I hear the cries,
But there's nothing I can do.
I just sit and pray.
I pray for you.
But my prayers
Unanswered.
Must God leave me now?
Must He abandon you?
In this time of need,
We look for the light.
It will lead our way,
That's what I'm told,
But I've never seen the light.
Not until I saw you.
You're the light I wanted,
I needed.
And I want to be the light.
The light that could lead you.
But I'm lost in it all.
There's nothing left for me to do,
But listen from the darkness,
As it consumes all I say.
You acknowledge my voice,
Yet somehow it's left unheard.

Just tell me what happened.
You hide it away for too long.
And afterwards,
It's all too much.
I understand.
But you're in pain.
You long for help,
That I'm incapable of giving.
I want to be the one to dry your tears.
Tears?
But you're not crying.
Don't keep it in.
Don't make it worse.
You know it's not good.
Why keep the facade?
If it's what you want,
I can't stop it.
You're the one in control.
I,
A humble listener.
My words have no power.
You acknowledge my voice,
Yet somehow it's left unheard.

Your whispers keep me awake.
I want to sleep.
I need to sleep.
You're soft, but all this is fake.
Soon it will come.
It has to come.
You're putting my life at stake.
Exhaustion kills.
This pillow kills.
Your lies won't give me a break.
My arm, so red.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.

I hate you.
I always have
And I always will.
You've never given me nothing, but stress.
Nothing, but pain.
Nothing, but fear.
From the very beginning I was scared.
Scared of death.
Scared of you.
You, who takes it all away,
As you look all of us straight in the eyes
And do nothing, but say with your heartless silence
"I am your master, now bow to me".
But I shan't bow no more.
I've had enough.
My own path is forged with more pain and suffering.
The pain that is better than your voice.
The suffering that won't bow to your commands.
I'm scared.
But that fear means nothing to me anymore.
I hate you.

Though we thought that our journey was over,
I see a light of a new adventure.
Though we thought we would not meet again,
The stars have aligned in our favor.
The fanfares are so loud, I feel pride.
I am looking where I have to go.
To get back to the place where I come from.
To the place where we all belong.
I can see them, right on the horizon,
All the people I've left behind.
Now it's time for me to come forth
And make the best of what I have in mind.

My head can solve equations.
My heart can make them come true.
But you're this little problem,
Resulting in something new.

Heal me, oh, heal me.
Why is the pain still there?
Feel me, oh, feel me.
Feel the bumps on my back and my neck.
Steal me, oh, steal me.
Though I know I have no real worth.
**** me, oh, **** me.
Erase the scars of my birth.

As the darkness consumes me with all of its might,
I pray for a glimmer, a spector of light.
The weeping is loud, it comes from all sides,
But nothing is true, this echo, those cries.
Invisible stairs, they won't leave me be.
I follow the voices, since I cannot see.
I've punctured my hands, my feet, and my face,
So my blood surrounds where I rest my case.
I know no one's searching, since I chose this path.
How deep is the delve? Have I dug enough?

So fluffy, so soft,
Above my small head.
So little, alone,
A long awaited bed.
Pure white and yet blue,
On a paper sheet.
So little, like you,
A cloud just like me.

What is this feeling
I get all the time?
The feeling of loneliness,
Equivalent to a crime.
Why seeing her face
Is what I can't do?
Why talking was always
Forbidden by you?
Still love keeps on knocking
And truth be told,
I don't think I can keep shut
These fragile doors.
Oh, I am so miserable
And who would have thought,
Nobody cares,
When I'm to get shot.

As a soul that's been shattered on the ground,
Blame everyone that's ever been around.
Make excuses for every single choice.
Scream out loud, but no one hears your voice.
Failure is looking down upon you.
Can't tolerate people with a different view.
Spinning in circles until the very end.
Falling over, not knowing how to stand.
Drowning, yet knowing how to breathe.
The truth is not what you believe.
Awaken, since this is just a dream,
Before your eyes plot another scheme.

I'm out of breath,
Yet the pain doesn't come.
I keep falling over,
But it's just for show.
I crawl out of hell,
Yet I get pulled right back.
I try to move forward,
But I know I'm stuck.
No one is here,
They all keep me out.
Nobody cares
About what I shout.
Your warmth had died out
A long time ago.
You're cold like a knife,
Landing in my throat.

Life is our adventure,
Like a game with multiple endings.
Trying to get the highest score
And play as long as you can.
But there is one big difference between them,
As there is no saves in reality,
Still it takes us time to realize that
And we always forget about it.
So we live in pain of wrong choices.
We live in fear instead of fun.
Our power of free mind is limited,
Since we can't undo what is done.

Please forgive love for being so strong, yet so fragile.
Forgive life for being so long, yet ending so abruptly.
Forgive hate for existing, yet disappearing.
Forgive death for being expected, yet changing everyone.
Help them become one, as what is needed in this world is balance,
Or let them devour each other, so there's nothing left to feel.
I come here to beg you with my last breath,
To see what your answer may be,
As I start to fade from existence of forever
And escape from you, eternity.