If I close my eyes
And hold my breath,
I could be a tree.
Stand real still
Right here with me
And stay here for eternity.

I sound like a broken record,
How many times will I say it?
How many people will ask?
I needed a release,
I needed a release,
I needed a release.
Nobody understands,
Always the questions:
"Why did you do it?"
"What did he do?"
Always the judgement:
"*****."
"Murderer."
"Gold digger."
"*****."
The rumors, oh how they fly:
"She cheated... He found out."
"She wanted his money."
"She's insane."
They don't know
How long it took me to pick it up,
Point it at his head,
Pull the ****** trigger.
His blood on my hands for a change.
See, people never knew
His abusive side.
But I did.
My stitches,
Bruises,
And broken bones are all the proof I need.
Now I'm free,
Free to do as I please,
Free until the day I die.
Then, they tell me:
Jail,
Life sentence.
Where's my fair trial?
My jury?
My judge?
Welcome to America,
Land of the eternally ******.

You know what I really want?
More than anything
Right here, in this moment?
I want you to call me
Text me
Email me
Message me on facebook,
Whatever you want,
But I want you to get in touch with me,
Maybe not today,
Maybe not tomorrow,
Maybe in ten years,
And when you do
I want you to admit to me
Just how much I meant to you,
How much our breakup was the biggest mistake
Of your life.
And I want you to tell me this,
Crying the entire time,
Then I want to be able to calm you down
And tell you three simple words:
*"I. Don't. Care"

I comfort you,
You comfort me
Is this the way we're destined to be?
Is there no day when
I won't need you or
You won't need me?
But wait...
You shy away from unwanted conversations.
I think you stopped needing me awhile ago,
If you ever needed me
To begin with.
Welp, now it's just me.