I wish that I could wake up with Amnesia*
I really liked you
And forget about these stupid little things
Trusted you. I felt like I was finally getting up on my feet but love...
Love is the coin
and when it runs out of spins
It turns it's back
like how it felt to fall asleep next to you
That is the one thing I wish would go away.
Your lips. I remember our last kiss and yes, I remember the make up running down my face when you told me you were leavin'
I still cry. Even cried on my dads shoulder tonight.
and the memories that never can escape
Memories. I wish that I could wake up with ammesia.
cause I'm not fine at all
maybe this was just a dream
I'll make it one.
*cause I'm really not fine at all

I miss my words.
I miss using them in a context of metaphors that made peoples heads hurt.
I make my head hurt.
I miss my words.
I miss my hearing.
I miss my vision but I'm to spaced thinking about your hands and how they easily grabbed mine and your lips ever so gently whispered sweet nothings on mine.
I squeeze your hand but I looked down....
Yours is replaced by him and only half the man.
He asked what's wrong?
I just wish for once someone will ask me what's right.
~T

Today at exactly 4:07 p.m on September 2, 2014
On a perfect kind of weather tuesday  
Standing in the press box, which is normally like an oven, but not today. The cool air filled the press box like it could snow or prince charming himself could come kiss you at any moment in the rain.
Filming people running around on a field catching footballs like bullets
I felt my heartbeat
It was pulled from way back on the selves of your heart where you can't seem to put an order to things because well, it leaves space but this time
This time you took the time to grab mine again and dusted it off for finger prints but you only found yours.
you text me to tell me, I wasn't the only one.

*T~

1 a.m
: I'm laying here,thinking
: my heart just as heavy as when you left it.
But you didn't really leave it. You have it which makes all of this worse
Because
                    for
                                   once
I'm trying to move on. Trying to let my pinky go so we can't hold on to the promise of forever.
And yes I see that **** on Facebook.
You're her everything. The love of her life. She gets to feel your lips on hers.
Something I never got to feel because your there and I'm here and that's exactly 1,163.5 miles away.
Its not fair
Never fair
Fine
Never fine
I'm tried of that ******* word.
2 a.m
: crying to music
I hate when we talk and you tell me to look up a song.
I try to put back my pieces through this song that you shattered me in the first place with.
I'm so deeply inlove with you
I'm so deeply inlove with you
I'm so
             d
                e
                  e
                    p
   ­                   l
                       y
Inlove with you.
But so is she and right now your heart beats for her while my heart beats for you in the palm of your hands.

3 a.m
: eyes so swollen they have to shut, dreaming
You're so deeply inlove with me.