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  Nov 2015 Does It Even Matter
AFR
When I felt as though I was going to implode you hugged me till everything was better
You wrapped your arms around me until my broken pieces fit back together
It's been a month yet you're already a sister
I can't imagine what I'd do without you on my side
I don't think I could survive
This poem is cruddy and written at 4 am
If you love me let me know
Because I'm not yet ready to completely let go,
I say yet with cause,
Because I'm tired of being wrapped so tightly in the gauze
of your life. Because without yet,
You have to get
to the conclusion alone that we cannot escape
the inevitable. We cannot recreate
what we had, saying had
because we're bad
enough that we lost what we found sparked our curiosity
of love.
That what pushed us forward with such animosity
is gone.
You have chosen to lose hope in us
You have chosen to give up on us
Thus restating the completely frustrating inevitable life sentence you have created that is in itself, over.
What are we that in a sea full of lies I can look into your eyes and still have hope for the future. But we have an effect,
An effect not know yet,
That could solely heat a city of a thousand men.
Don't say we're over unless you're ready to bulldozer our empire.
You can't retire a burning fire without first using a water hose.
Don't close your eyes if you're gonna realize that everything you're about to lose is worth more than the muse of a memory.

Don't give up hope and let a threat threaded rope of words hang from your neck after you've already slain the dragon and won the battle.

Happiness is worth fighting for.
That's why I'll spend my lifetime fighting.
One
Here I go
I'm doing it. Yes, yes I'm actually doing it.
blink. blink. blink. blink.
Oh Come on,
Just speak from the heart, I know you can do it,
blink. blink. blink. blink.

Hurry up you can do this.
tick. tick. tick. tick.
One minute, five minutes, ten minutes, an hour.
Think of the past, Think of regret,
No, stay in the present.
tick. tick. tick. tick.

Breathe in, breathe out, listen to your heart beat.
one. two. three. four.
okay here I go.
I'm stuck here aren't I?
I'm trapped with thoughts of goodbye.
one. two. three. four.

Stop digging yourself into a deeper hole.
one foot,
two feet,
six feet under.
trapped in a box,
forever, ever after.
*four. three. two...

— The End —