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 Oct 2012 matthewkirn
Deswer
This poem is going to be a lie
He tells himself
Writhing in tantalizing filaments
The bright asphyxiation drawing him closer and closer
To this
An ideal
Of the perfect truth
Told out in unwritten song
Painfully typed words
A clever shower of meteors
Belittling the dangerous craters on the surface
The danger of tripping and dying
Not withstanding what we know to be
A falicy
My multilingual interpretation of her feelings
Old testimonies heard in the court
Of the already guilty
This poem is a complete distortion of facts
My trivial response to empowered individuals
Standing on my Adam's Apple
And beating on my lungs like drums
Rhythm meaning honor
And the attention of the onlookers meaning
The inviting glow
Of the fireplace.
She sat down next to
That night
That town
That unfamiliar castigating of a child not belonging to
You
Or her
Or the abyss
"Unbelonging"
"Inbelonging"
Not.  Yours.

The wordsmith falters
Checking his math
Calculation, equation, kiss on the cheek
For luck for death
For the noose to slip, lovingly
And gently to the ground as the trap door swings open
A great, open toothed smile
Laughing at silence
BARBARIC to interrupt such delicacy
Straining to look into my eyes
She whispers low
I want to find a home...
And i tell her, with my heaviest conviction
"No home is."
Which could mean anything.
This poem is a verisimilitude
A lie about a truth
Which, again...
Could mean anything...
 Oct 2012 matthewkirn
Nathan
Look to the horizon
this day we fight.
We start our uprising
and battle through the night.
No one can stop us
today we break free.
Free from asylum
we have found the key.
loves grip has never frightened me
but then again
I have never been so tied down.
And not until the unwritten laws of tradition
have been cast upon you
can you experience such emotions
And when the two intertwine, twisting, combining can you see
how that grip is burning
and how tightly it is slung around your forearms
tugging and tugging
and the refusal to loosen
or break, and then once, he lets go for a breath
you make decisions
and are hauled  from reality,
from tradition
hauled into the escapade
of someone else's game
and then you learn
The course you're in
never did run smooth
and you're indeed,
frightened.
***
Tears fall to the ground,
She wonders
How did I get like this
Why did i let myself fall,
Her old ways
Settling in,
Her guilty pleasures
Wanting to take control
The pills call her name,
The razor fits so perfectly
In her hands,
The sick
Twisted
Happy feeling that she gets
At the sight of her blood,
And the tingling sensation
She feels as the pills set in,
She gets shaky
Nervous,
Flustrated,
Just thinking about it,
Wondering if she will have the strength
To stop it before it even starts.
Almighty Printer
So big and so strong
So powerful and noble
That you could never go wrong

Or so they say on the box,
Through the ads, on the phone,
But have they ever mentioned the fact
That it has a mind of its own?

When it suddenly stops working
And decides to break,
you start to wonder, was it really worth the pay,
the wait and all those tantrums by the lake?

Almighty printer
So big and so strong,
But really, at the end, you always go wrong.
 Oct 2012 matthewkirn
Zoe
Tonight I will dream
that I am
falling.
I will clutch for safety
and grab nothing.
It will dawn on me
that I am
twelve stories high,
and the unforgiving ground
is quickly approaching.
My face to the sky,
I will accept my fate
and brace for impact.
A moment before
I am no more than
a starburst on the pavement–
I will wake.

Gasping for air, strangely
metallic in taste,
I will take a moment
to realize I am still alive.
My eyes will be open, but I will see
nothing but darkness.
My ears will be alert
to nothing but
my dry sobs.
Still paralyzed from the dream,
I will take inventory
of my legs, my arms, my spine,
and only when they are all found in tact
will the air stop tasting
like blood.

Shaking, I will turn blindly
to my left, wanting only
to murmur into your sleepy ear,
"I had a bad dream."
My fingertips will reach
for your shoulder, your back,
eager to trace your warmth
under my palm.
I will know
that the only way to calm my breathing
will be to tell my bones
that you are lying tangent to me,
wrapping yourself around my curves,
so close that if I am
silent, I might be able
to hear your heart beat–
and this will bring me back to life,
for my bones know
that you would never let me
fall.

Tonight, I will dream
that I am
falling.
I will prepare myself
to meet Death.
And I will whisper to you
in the dark, until I remember
my voice cannot carry
a thousand miles in the wind
to where you are sleeping.
So I will close my eyes,
force my chest still,
and wait for the nightmare
to strike again,
knowing it is better
than being awake.
 Oct 2012 matthewkirn
Liliana
As I find myself in a state of sorrow, on look from his brown eyes lifts my spirits greatly. As he nuzzles into my embrace, the smile that plays about my face grows brighter with each second that he continues to show his love. I lean down to kiss the top of his head and his excitement for my affection and love for him shows greatly.
 Oct 2012 matthewkirn
Sandra
The crisp of autumn’s sigh
brushes my hair into my eyes
With a giggle that muffles
behind my closed lips
I am kissed with a
nostalgic bliss
Beauties of golds, reds, and yellows
orange and faded greens of trees
A crunch follows me with every footstep
Upon fallen leaves
I am lulled into a wakening dream
a fairy tale I love so well
Made up with every single sight
a sight that leaves me breathless and light
So innocent, how children do
living within their childhood hue
I grasp for that inner being,
that little girl that never stopped dreaming
and its so wonderful, that naivete
to stop and not worry of how life is supposed to be
The reflection from your smile bursts past my eyes & burns spots into my conscious.
The kindness of your words empty doubts planted from years of self-lament.
The lovely spirit of your touch engulfs my senses and leaves me restless.
Then I picked you a flower, and it withered in your calloused hand.
You encourage progress, but through strict and taut reprimand.
You're so close, I cannot breath.
Suffocated by your presence.
Thoughts that could not deceive.
Decaying along with my dependance.
Obviously shaking from lack of reality.
Unwillingly anticipating your unruly authority.
Exploded, but there's still some attachment.
Don't you think so?

-grace12.3.2011
I love you, these three little words are the words you say to mean
but is that really what you mean?
Again you say those three little words and again I wonder if it is true.
You see it is not fair to do this but, I just wonder if you even know what those three little words mean.
So just stop and think, is this real or make believe?
At night I say this to you and there is no return but silence.
This all seems so fake, just look me in the eye and just once return those three little words that can mean oh so very much!
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