Where you be
girl
you got sand in your skirt
had a dream that the cat
from that show
slapped me on the back
said "hey girl
I like your style
won't come
and play a while?"
I giggled
it's what I'm good for
what's funny?
All of it
the people
the nothing
the fact that's it's so boring
when there isn't a single thing to do
or person
or place
just nope
but oh well
sing in the sky
like it's 1985
and fall back down
when it's midnight,
curfews are for your own good
like veggies
you like em, you love em, you need em
and then
you leave

Electric
tingles
primal
friction
diction
in movements
bristles
sweat
breaths
skin
necks
dark
rolling
sliding
­grabbing
and then
nice knowing you

Today is only,
this second the last
tomorrow isn't promised
let's have a blast.
Let's get our feet wet
and make some boys cry
and get really mellow
and make the slugs dry.

it's a hard knocked life
for a bus
rolling down the highway
which way
go left go left
stop!
don't know why i'm here
anywhere
and it doesn't matter
really
but it gets you down
when your existence is brought into question
like why?
and more importantly
how
can you make it feel
not so empty?

so there
it's all settled
be it and leave it
up to the gods
to decide
the innocent from the guilty
and then
to figure out
what exactly to do
with all that
apathy

I’m feeling awfully selfish
So listen-
One time I thought it’d be cool to be a person,
One with feelings and thoughts and one hell of a body
But it was work, let me tell you
To be so mortal
It was uncomfortable, caring and loving and dealing with necessities
So I left it
Left my skin and drifted away
Like the breeze
I was gone
And I do not intend
To be quite so human
Ever again.

Ooh you make me
So frustrated
With myself
But it should be you
That I want to punch
Because
It’s hard to read
You,
I want to,
Just know what you’re thinking
About my existence
And speaking with you,
If you get the silly feelings
Smile randomly throughout the day
Because you know the other is doing something somewhere,
But I can’t know such things
You won’t tell
Perhaps you have nothing to say,
And it’s all in my head
This thing I want to call a maybe us
And really
We’re just two people
In the world-
But really
I can’t accept that
Because really
You’ve made me happier
Than any other ******* I’ve met
In a long, long
Ever.

Theoretically
(not)
life will be changing more than I have ever previously known.
Home will be more relative
family depending on the location,
friends going far away and being introduced
dear God I'm scared
I'm scared of the distance
of the difference
just keep things the same
please?
Can't we just keep with the now
and never tell people good bye?
It's too painful
too unknown
what if you never see them again?
What if too much is never revealed?
Give me more time please
or just speed it up
stop with the ambiguity time!
I don't play well with new people
let's just keep the same ones!

Today
when your fingers were almost grazing my thigh,
and you were leaned in,
and I could hear your passion in my ear....
when your eyes emitted blatant tension to my pleasure receptors
and I could only breathe to keep from losing consciousness,
all I could think of
is how restrictive clothing is,
and how your skin would feel otherwise.

Dear you
Why are you so sad?
You must know
How absolutely magnificent you are,
How when you look at me
I believe
Space shatters
Because the molecules in the air between us get tighter,
They can sense your immense
Whatever the hell you are,
How ******* amazingly you exist
There
Everywhere you go,
You’re you
And it makes me proud
To say I know
The most interesting
Perfect man
Who breathed the same air as the unworthies.

He says he wants to travel the world
with me, of course
and I say
I think that's one hell of an idea
you got there
in your head
which I think is pretty **** great
acceptable in my eyes
I think about you
more than you'd like to think about
and I just want you to know
although I'm not good enough
(trust me)
I want to be,
want to be yours
in the sort of way
that allows for sweet walks
romancing talks
want to hold your hand
and just do ****
like read books
and nap
and go groccery shopping;
I want to do anything with you
because with you
it all becomes
infinitely more worth doing.

On nights like these
when I feel the absolute singularity of my soul
I sit
and I think
of anything I possibly can
but you-
can't say why exactly,
I don't think of you often,
not explicitly,
but I know that you are always in the deep recesses of my thoughts
lurking
you are no longer who I knew,
you are a concept
not alive but merely subsisting on my former affections-
I don't know who you are today
or why I feel
that even though we belong not at all to each other
I feel responsible
left out
and yet I know
if I were to know
just what you do between the hours of awake and asleep
if I knew what you were seeing in your dreams
I would fall apart
millions of shattered shards of pain
I would rather never see or speak to you again
than to know the truth of your existence without me.

Could I be
Your little lady?
Don’t have to tell
Anyone at all
Just want to be
Yours and yours
And nobody else’s
I can keep secrets
Would like to be one of yours
Although I’d want to shout it
To random people in streets,
From the furthest star from this point of the universe
That I belong
Wholly and 100%
To you.

Who is you
that boy
that thing
what is his thoughts
who are his voices
why is he thinking
not of me
or improperly so
so
what to do
about being too odd
too even
never right
left out
of his mind
I think
therefore, I go insane
just want to know
if the feelings are positive
or at the very least
not related to disgust

no matter how
or who
or whenwherewhy
things happen,
almost naturally
as if time is true
and matter interacts with said time
in such a way
that life exists
and then
it doesn't matter
because
all is
and all
is all
there can be expected
to be

Little lively lovelies
Sitting in a tree
What do you see?
Does the planet look so different
Ten feet higher?
I can get up there,
Conspire, desire
Want to be
In the trees
Where the beautiful things
Open their beautiful wings
And don’t even fall
When they jump for joy
But live in the sky
Like wonderful moving paintings
Of color and form
Just a swarm
Of frenzy in a new degree.

believe it
and let it be heard
that all that is here
is not
but a thing in your
bed
take a good look
next time you're out
about
walking down the street
and you see a man
just a man
nothing more
nothing less
and he's standing
nowhere to go
that you know
and he looks
and he is aware
of what you will never be;
he is aware of things
that you can not know
because
they are his things to know
and our things
to not care about
or at least
**** on in our dreams

it's hard to say exactly
what it is to get your heart broken-
three times, to be exact
by the same person-
difficult to discern why it is
you keep going back
but maybe it's simple:
you love them
you miss the way your life was with them,
so why was it so easy for them to cut and run?
they say "I still love you"
"I wish we could be together"
so why can't we?
long distance *****
but do you know what ***** more?
living without your other half.

don't even know
can't
too soon
but maybe....
all is well
or acceptable
it's alright
for now
for later
not so bad
when things fall
together, apart
inevitables taking care of themselves
cells having souls
that's the goal
of all of us who'd like to believe
that cities are simply breathing rocks

I think I think of things
in a way that alters not their reality
but my own true ways of being happy around them.
I think that I think
so much
that the world around me warps into a nightmare
filled with people
the dreaded people
making me interact
talk
have feelings
my thoughts make them monsters
who want either to hurt me
or wish that I would disappear altogether
but mostly
I think my thoughts can be tamed
with a little courage from my cowardly lion soul
I can be
dare I say it
content

i have lots to say
just can't say them
with words
out loud-
they remain in my head,
forever and always,
locked away
never to be heard
by ears
or minds
of those who should
know what happens
when I'm breathing

or at least
those I wish
to care

Ifs and ifs
and I know what I want
but how
to find
it
him
without things
getting weird?