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 Feb 2017 Mary Pear
AprilDawn
Blaze
 Feb 2017 Mary Pear
AprilDawn
a bright trail
of stark Spring sunshine
through the  bedroom
window shade
pry my eyes open
to see
***** dancing
dust bunnies
reminding me
that
spring cleaning
needs to  move up
on my  to -do
list
yeah....dust bunnies, dog hair and winter clothes have set up camp at our house .Got to get to it !
 Feb 2017 Mary Pear
AprilDawn
broken heart
made from all the finest
ingredients
baked to perfection
or so I thought
jagged crumbles
trail down my mouth
scrumptious failure
iced with
bittersweet defeat
never tasted
so  divine
Even broken cookies taste just fine ...
 Feb 2017 Mary Pear
AprilDawn
Really
the longer you live
the more you shift between
the what is and what was
sometimes the transitions
are smoother than others
today I found myself
within a few layers
of my former life
interwoven
with my current experience
always a bittersweet mixture
somewhere half way
between gratefulness
with a touch of regret
and a modicum of relief
that so many frayed edges
were smoothed enough
to make it all stay together
for the most part
not sure where tomorrow is going
but right here, right now
just hanging in there
and not sure
how long the thread
is…
My life and times
 Feb 2017 Mary Pear
AprilDawn
so many tables  
stacked with catalogs
and coffee cups
our long discussions  
cluttered  with memories  
and
relatives
long renting spaces
underground
potential plans made
like  guest beds in our minds  
favorite tv shows
devouring  our  
afternoons and evenings
together  
dotted  with  
occasional power
struggles
minds at odds
a generational
dissonance
the  backdrop  
for  the need
to leave  the nest
again
freedom I sought
and liberty
was gained
now
flash forward
less than a decade
later
and you
are wrapped
  in a mere
flesh shell of existence
no longer engaged
in this world
with anything
but breath  
and  discomfort
thankful
for tender mercies
am I
  for you
still remember me
for
now
I have begun to lose my mother to  some form of dementia over the past 2 years .I have to relive old conversations from years and decades past , because she cannot  actually discuss anything really anymore  . She is   repetitive and circular in nature now and short term memory is  getting worse. She  was so sharp witted .We had a rough mother -daughter relationship. She does love me , and I am an only child.My father  takes care of her currently   and they  live  several states away from me .She hardly laughs anymore.It is sad for us all to see her disappearing.
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