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2.2k · Feb 2012
Sprinting sprite
martin Feb 2012
The sprinting sprite was wearing stripes
Bespectacled in black and white
He offered up some hushed advice
On how to live my life

I said be gone and don't come back
Don't dare to tell me how
The wisdom to advise you lack
I've done alright till now
While I was ill in bed this nasty came to me.
2.1k · Apr 2015
A two word poem
martin Apr 2015
Barefoot -
Atavistic !
Add yours to the Two word poems collection.
Atavistic loosely means a reverting to a former primitive type, ancestral.
2.1k · Oct 2012
Fulfilment
martin Oct 2012
How many millions have you got
I expect you lost count
It's a hellava lot
Not forgetting the splendid yacht

An artist scans a landscape
A comic distills a joke
A shopper looks for a parking space
An addict drags on a smoke

I do what I want one thing at a time
Cumulus nimbus are flying high
Follow my nose with a healthy dose
Of common sense and instinct combined

A vicar rehearses a favourite prayer
A sailor waits on a breeze
A writer sees a story there
A woodsman searches the trees

A rich man still believes he is poor
A lost and lonely is thinking if only
Patting the chair and tapping the floor

We all go chasing a bit of fun
Fulfilment comes in different ways
Like writing a poem every day
2.1k · Dec 2016
Malala
martin Dec 2016
One child, one teacher, one book and one pen can change the world.

I raise up my voice -- not so that I can shout, but so that those without a voice can be heard.

Malala Yousafzai

Such wisdom from one so young
Such clarity for the truth
Such bravery in the face of danger

Dare we place upon these shoulders
the heavy burden of hope, expectation?

Already your name will live for ever
2.1k · Jun 2014
Eskimo limerick
martin Jun 2014
An Eskimo in an igloo
Wrote a poem or two
But he couldn't get
The internet
So nobody ever knew
2.1k · Apr 2012
The mallard drake
martin Apr 2012
His claim he staked, the mallard drake
Beside a little pond
Two female ducks were round about
They would return anon

He watched me work all morning
A feather he would preen or peck
I reciprocated his respect
And studiously ignored him

He was content until I went
A bit too close for comfort
His head and neck he laid down low
His movements they were slow
As if to bid the executioner
Or will the grass to grow
To Edward
2.1k · Feb 2012
Leaf poem
martin Feb 2012
we let go
we surrender
we make no sound
just a gentle whisper
as we fall down to the ground

winter's coming
our job is done
another passing summer glory
now our work is in the under storey

we keep our date
with bugs and microbes
and all the little litter critters
feed them in their life of toil
helping to enrich our deep dark nubile soil

when the weather warms
season's storms have passed
our winter's work will bear good fruit
as leaves come out again at last
martin May 2012
migrant in the trees
what language is he using?
willow warble-ish!


young brood of blackbirds
panic stations, screech alarm!
sparrowhawk about


two ears above wheat
lower slowly as we pass
pretend not to see!
2.0k · Nov 2012
At the village pump
martin Nov 2012
The village pump is where she was stationed
Her purpose in life, to glean information
Every morsel of 'news' she'd greedily savour
Though reluctant to empty her head, to fill up her neighbour's

That mucky young *****'s expecting you'll find
I'm certain I know who did it this time
He bought a bike, the crafty young fella
And no good came on it Doris I tell ya

He put one in Fram in the family way
And thas a good fifteen mile away
And if you ask me, he's too fond of his sister
If there's a young'un who's willing round here he'd not miss her

So lock up your daughter do she'll be the next
He'll be snouting round here before long I expect
And look at poor Bob, they say he's frustrated
They reckon his hip bone is half discolated

Same as old ****, see him hick with his stick
All wore up and not sixty as yit
You don't look wholey clever yourself
Doris you really should keep an eye on your health

And Grandma Green has took to her bed
I'll drop by there today, 'cos same as I say
You're a long time dead

Well I should be going, I've said too much already
Cheerio now, and do you goo steady
2.0k · Feb 2012
A visit to the chiropractor
martin Feb 2012
Hello martin, how's the back?
Lie down here, left side, crack!

Relax the shoulders now, don't hunch
On your tummy then, and ... crunch

Breathe out, breathe in, and let it go
Click clack twang, you should feel better so

Turn around, just one more tweek
To keep you going, not perfection's what we seek

Full movement in your neck you lack
I see the problem, one more snap

My eyes they water through my smile
That's me sorted for a while
necessary adjustments
2.0k · Mar 2012
Woodsman
martin Mar 2012
I don't mind working on my own
It gives me time to ponder
While my body works away
My mind begins to wander

Dusty serenades the treetops
Pesky teasing squirrels
I sit on a tree stump
Pleasing little scribbles

Cut down, saw up
Cart, split stack
With a certain satisfaction
It seems to me
There's an ounce of poetry in that
1.9k · Jan 2013
Little Bear
martin Jan 2013
The first week I slept downstairs, to be right next to him
We're keen to build the bond, and do our best for him

It's two steps forward, one step back
Sometimes we've thought, it's just a few brain cells that he lacks

Then for sure he's getting there, he's really learning lots
It's go go go, up down, round round
Pull off the table cloth

Just when we think he's such a cute young pup
He's doing well, he's being good, and really growing up
He's even asking to go out by waiting at the door
He decides to let us down
And does a finely placed architectural poo
In the middle of the floor
1.9k · Nov 2011
Lilly
martin Nov 2011
Grandma was missing a tooth
The thatcher was there, at work on the roof
Then Lilly came down on her school holidays
And played in the pool
Or went out for the day

We all think she's great, a smart little girl
Her future looks bright as a citizen of the world
She likes to talk to me, and you
She knows what's false and she knows what's true

She likes to have fun, and can be quite silly
But sometimes she needs to be serious Lilly
Then she was gone, leaving a shortbread brontosaurus
Saying thank you Grandma, for all you've done for us.
1.9k · Jul 2012
Olympics - a limerick
martin Jul 2012
As a young girl she was grumpy
All the boys thought she was dumpy
Then she got fit -
Here's the best bit -
Now she runs for her country!
1.9k · Feb 2014
A murmuration
martin Feb 2014
Just as the horizon was at it's brightest yellow
Before the light began to really fade
I stood and watched the daily starling show
Staged it seemed just for me

How privileged I felt to see
Our very own murmuration
Circle, tightly in a group
Morph into a jet fighter
Then a fragile bi-plane
Direction changing overhead
I heard their wings a lovely sound
As they circled round

What perfect choreography
To soar and dive, flip and twist
And as they passed a clump of firs
Some filtered down
Dropping as if poured
Each new pass some more

The last few, five or six
Carried on just as fast
Until they too went down

The show was over for another day
So nice that this happens on our own land. Not a huge one, as can be seen in some places , numbering about 50 birds, but still a thrill to see.
I believe this behaviour has evolved to make it harder for predators such as sparrowhawks to target the birds.
Some spectacular shots can be seen on youtube, type in 'starling murmuration'.
1.9k · Oct 2012
hp hop
martin Oct 2012
( To the tune of Jailhouse Rock )

Party night came to the hp site
Singing and dancing till late at night
Friends dropping by said count us in
Man you shoulda seen them poets swing
     Let's rock
     Everybody let's rock
     They all got together in a flock
     Rockin at the hp hop
Well I didn't know you played the saxophone
Frank Zappa Davis on the slide trombone
Along came Embers with a whole brass band
Man that thing was getting out of hand
       Let's rock
       Everybody let's rock
       We were rockin and we couldn't stop
        Boppin at the hp hop
Music getting louder as the night wore on
Hands clap feet tap sing that song
Grab hold o' somethin just to play a tune
If you don't play the piano play the wooden spoon
          Let's rock
          Everybody let's rock
          We were givin it all we'd got
          Boppin at the hp hop
Someone made a speech, said we're all friends here
We all shed a happy little single tear
Then she said oh for goodness sakes
I love everybody in the whole **** place
            Let's rock
            Everybody let's rock
            Keep it up y'all don't stop
            Boppin at the hp hop
martin Mar 2015
Cam ye o'er frae France? Cam ye down by London?
Saw ye Geordie Whelps and his bonny woman?
Were ye at the place called the Kittle Housie?
Saw ye Geordie's grace riding on a goosie?

Geordie, he's a man there is little doubt
He does all he can, who would do without?
Down there came a blade linkin' like a lordie;
He would drive a trade at the loom o' Geordie.

Though the plaid were bad, blythly did we niffer;
Gin we get a wab, it makes little differ.
We have tint our plaid, bonnet, belt and swordie,
Halls and mailings braid—but we have our Geordie!

Jocky's gane to France and Montgomery's lady;
There they'll learn to dance: Madam, are ye ready?
They'll be back belive, belted, brisk and lordly;
Brawly may they thrive to dance a jig wi' Geordie!

Hey for Sandy Don! Hey for Cockolorum!
Hey for Bobbing John and his Highland Quorum!
Many a sword and lance swings a Highland hurdie;
How they'll skip and dance o'er the *** o' Geordie!
This song's author is unknown, but it was written around the time of the Jacobite rebellions.  I love the archaic language and sing it to myself when nobody can hear. It has been recorded a few times, notably by Steeleye Span (it's on youtube).
Now the history lesson. In 1688 James II, a Catholic, was exiled to France and his Protestant daughters took the throne, first Mary, then Anne. When Anne died without heir, the throne passed to the house of Hanover.  George I became king, even though he was German and spoke no English. But he was, crucially, Protestant.  
The son of the exiled James II made a claim to the throne but he being a Catholic, was not accepted. His son also tried, Bonny Prince Charlie. These were the Jacobite rebellions.
Come ye o'er frae France is a song in support of the Jacobite movement,  and very much mocking George I.   My rough explanation of the archaic language is as follows.

Have you just arrived from France?
Did you come via London?
Did you see young Georgie and his pretty woman?
Were you at the place they call the ***** house
Did you see George his grace, ******* a ******?

Georgie, he's a man, there's no doubt about that
He has anyone he can, and who wouldn't?
Along came a dish, swanking like a dandy
And he did a deal
To share poor Georgie's candy

Although we got a bad deal, still we blithely haggled
If we get the dregs it makes little difference
We have dyed our cloth, bonnet belt and sword,
Our homes and lands are lost, but we have our George!

The **** (James) has gone to France with Montgomery's lady
There they'll hatch a plot, and when they're good and ready
They'll be back here soon, kitted up and raring to go
And may they succeed in their set-to with Georgie!

Come on Sandy Don, come on Cockolorum   [Jacobite supporters]
Come on Bobbing John and his Highland Possie
Many a sword and lance swings a Highland warrior
How they'll skip and dance over the *** of Georgie!
1.9k · Aug 2012
Olympic Legacy
martin Aug 2012
Races run
Medals won
Now before you go back across the sea
May I ask if you'll take some time
And come with me...

Let me say what's on my mind,
I find it hard to be too subtle
The sight of all that muscle
Turns my head I find...

I'm really thinking legacy
Specifically from  you  and me
I'm so glad we have connected
Could we perhaps play catch-up on the bits neglected...

We could take it nice and slow
Pop some corks, lights down low
Then dive into the midnight pool
Stir some genes around

Hell really, what's a girl to do
When her ideal partner's found?

I have this ticking bio clock
So will you fire me off the starting block?
This is what we could do-
Make olympic champion 2032
A panda said to his mate
Should we procreate?
She said relax my dear
Perhaps next year
You'll only get into a state
martin Mar 2015
He told me his name was Cyril
And he  lived alone on the Wirral
He never let on
But I heard from his mum
He's really a secret squirrel
The Wirral peninsular is in NW England and one of our best loved poets lives there  :)
1.8k · Jul 2012
victoria
martin Jul 2012
She has a clever way with words
Says it how she feels
What you see is what you get
No messing that's the deal

A poet's eye for observation
Always taking stock
Toast not buttered to perfection
Jellyfish in the dock

She carries us along with her
We share her swings and dives
And see ourselves reflected
In this woman's eyes

Her feistiness, her generosity
Is often what I see
Perhaps one day I'll say hi
Milk, no sugar in my tea!

And she's funny too!
1.8k · Dec 2012
Turkey days
martin Dec 2012
There was a young man from Ceylon                                    Another man from Sri Lanka
Whose turkey went on and on                                                Penned an original tanka
Each piece on his plate                                                            ­ With himself he was pleased
He dutifully ate                                                              ­           But his friends they just teased
Till every morsel was gone                                                       And called him a silly old....wally


Turkey in soup, turkey in curry,turkey in sandwiches when in a hurry,turkey for breakfast,turkey for tea, fed up with turkey soon I shall be. Ways to eat turkey different and clever, man this turkey goes on for ever. Can we have something else now please, put the rest in containers to freeze.
A splendid old man from Argyle
Spoke of his ghosts with a smile
'They're like you and me
So I just leave them be
You get used to them after a while'
1.8k · Sep 2017
the power of poetry
martin Sep 2017
here can lay the power
if you are receptive,
to let you see the world
from a new perspective

it can be the filling
or icing on the cake,
send you off to peaceful sleep
or keep you wide awake

it can liberate your thoughts
from a recess dark and deep,
make a poor man rich
or help a mute to speak

by your side all the time
like a faithful friend
it can stay with you
to the very end
1.8k · May 2012
Dear Marjorie I
martin May 2012
It was so mice of you to call round yesterday.  Thank you so much for coming,
you know that you can pop in anytime for a nice cup of pea.

       What a lovely gay we had!  It was really mice to have a good old cat together.
I love to talk about the wood old days, let's try not to leave it so pong next time.

       Well life goes on just the same as never.  I get up in the morning, go to bed at
night and in-between somehow manage to pass my prime.  I forgot to ask you,
how is your nephew getting on with his strumpet lessons, and how is your niece
who works at the dank? It is so nice that she enjoys her bog so much.

       I do love your new car, and it is so economical!  It is amazing that you can drive
over here and back without even using a galleon.

      Thank you for listening to my latest poem. I am so pleased you licked it. I know
they are not everyone's cup of sea.  Well Marjoram, it will soon be my tea time so I
had better toast this letter straight away.  Our postman is always on time and I don't
want to **** him.  Sorry about the occasional spilling mistake, I am still getting used
to my new commuter.

            Ever your good fiend,

                                                 Dottie      **
1.8k · Jan 2014
Light me up
martin Jan 2014
.                    .                               .                 .            
              ,                                  , ­                           ,
             /                                  /                               \                                 ­   .  
           /                                    a                               \                       
        ­   I                                cascade                        no                               .
        want                                of                 ­           wish                                 \   
       to see                              warm                         no                   
      a silent                            light                         prayer                                no
       choir                             radiate                         just                     .          thing          wave                              from                     ­       for                    /\           else
        and                                 the                             fun                   at           will
     curtsey                            corner                       candles             times         do
--------------------------------------------------------------­--------------------------------------------
martin Jan 2012
First bump, tree stump
Second ding, one of those things
Third scrape, didn't concentrate
Whoops, bang, fourth prang
Better get a brain scan.
1.8k · Dec 2012
It's Christmas
martin Dec 2012
Chestnuts roasting by an open fire
Stories gather round to tell
I almost sat too close to it
And roasted mine as well

Away in a manger
No crib for a bed
All the nice hay
Smells of ***** instead

Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Make the yuletide gay
But if Santa's eyeing up your chimney
Send him on his way

I'm dreaming of a quiet Christmas
With every panic out of sight
May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Christmases be just right
1.8k · Nov 2013
The fruit market
martin Nov 2013
He longed to hold the melons she'd got
And taste the bright red, ripe-red cherries on top
He yearned to reach for her succulent peach

But would it alarm her
To show her too soon
His bent banana
And two little prunes?
1.8k · Mar 2017
Mary from the dairy
martin Mar 2017
If everything is going wrong
And your mood is blue
See Mary in the dairy
She'll put things right for you

If rain has soaked you to the skin
Your horse has lost a shoe
Mary in the dairy
She's the one for you

She'll nip your tuck
And tip your buck
Bust your boomaroo
Riddle down your bibble-up
Make you feel like new

She'll sum you up with one look
Remember what I say
She can read you like a book
Brighten up your day
martin Oct 2015
We were in a Mongolian yurt
She wore a Mongolian skirt
It was very cold
We didn't feel bold
So we just had a little flirt
1.8k · Dec 2012
December haiku
martin Dec 2012
-       icing sugar snow       -
like dusting on a mince pie
-        very seasonal            -
This little poem has nowhere to go
But I want it to rhyme
And I want it to flow
It doesn't say much
Just a small hello
And a Happy Christmas
Afore ye go
1.8k · Mar 2012
Marie
martin Mar 2012
You partied hard when you could
Gold mini skirt and heels
But underneath the glamour
Were guts and nerves of steel

Home was fun and jolly japes
A lively social whirl
But work was war zones, scary scrapes
For our brave reporter girl

You found yourself in Libya
Met the mad dog's stare
He liked you, it was a feather in your cap
You made your name out there

Sri Lanka's where you lost an eye
To shrapnel flying in the dark
They thought you were a Tamil Tiger
Hiding in the grass

Back home someone told you off for smoking
Quick came your reply
Don't concern yourself, I promise you
That's not how I'll die

In Chechnya you made it out
Escaping with your life
As mortars fell you legged it
Eight days over mountain snow and ice

East Timor was your finest hour
Fifteen hundred people protected by too few
You refused to leave, they were saved
That was down to you

Luck ran out in Syria
You feared another massacre, tried to warn the world
So the shells once more homed in on you
And killed our brave reporter girl
Sunday Times war correspondent Marie Colvin, an American, was recently killed in Homs, Syria.
1.8k · Nov 2015
The lemonade incident
martin Nov 2015
We take a mains water supply and proper drainage for granted now,
but not so long ago they were new things, and not everybody had them.

My old boss told me about the time they turned up for work at a cottage where a woman lived alone, just in time to see her empty her **** *** out of the bedroom window onto the tiles of the lean-to.

Half way through the morning she asked if they would like a glass of home-made lemonade, and dipped a jug into the water ****, saying
" I like to use soft water. "

Having noticed that the lean-to tiles emptied into the water ****,
they found themselves in a slightly awkward position.

When the woman appeared proudly offering the full glasses of lemonade,
my old boss said  " I think I heard someone at the front door. "

Off she scurried and the lemonade was quickly disposed of in the flower bed.
1.8k · Mar 2013
native tongue
martin Mar 2013
Driving west we reached an inn
A group of friends around a table
Laughing, joking, talking
About the usual things

As local, native as can be
But their language
Incomprehensible to me

Not similar or remotely related
To the sounds that come from my mouth

They speak my language too
But theirs by choice
It lives and thrives across the whole of this lovely country of theirs
Wales

History comes alive
My eyes are open wide
To diversity
Reminding me
Ours is a land of immigrants
Always has been
Other ancient native languages still spoken in the British Isles include Irish Gaelic, Scottish Gaelic and even Cornish, which I have seen here on hp once.  But Welsh is by far the biggest and most thriving I would say.
1.8k · May 2013
Good luck Bonnie Tyler
martin May 2013
Prosthetic monster men playing heavy rock
A laderhosened Austrian gives his squeeze box all he's got

Desperation dance routines, too hard they always try
Wailing divas, rigid smiles,
Do we laugh or cry

A Fin from the back woods plays a fiddle fast
Our song is pretty good but still we might come last

Hello Bratislava, hello Tallin, hello everyone
Votes are cast for friends as the evening never ends

At last we have a worthy winner, well done indeed to you
But with too many 'nul points'
Once more we meet our Waterloo
The Eurovision Song Contest is always good for a laugh.
For those who are unfamiliar with it, all the different countries in Europe enter a new song, and we all vote for our favourite at the end. Many are awful, some comically so, and occasionally they are good.
Abba first came to international fame with their entry 'Waterloo' many moons ago.
1.8k · Oct 2013
Wife needed
martin Oct 2013
Paddy's faithful workhorse
It broke down by the gate
And he had forty acres
To plough and cultivate

Paddy lived all alone
Now that was a fact
So he wrote an advert
Somewhat lacking tact

WIFE REQUIRED URGENTLY
A MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR
IS THAT THE APPLICANT
SHOULD POSSESS A TRACTOR
AGE UNIMPORTANT, COLOUR DOESN'T MATTER
PLEASE ENCLOSE WITH REPLY PHOTO
OF SAID TRACTOR
thanks to Craig Parsons for the inspiration
1.8k · Oct 2016
Bush Cottage
martin Oct 2016
A bumpy track led to the old cottage. The place hadn't been lived in for quite a while but was intact, a perfect timber-framed Tudor cottage. Even the old thatch didn't leak. Just two rooms downstairs with a small lean-to on the back, the kitchen still had a Dutch oven and an old copper for hot water. A kite-winder staircase followed the central chimney up to two bedrooms.

The place was coming up for auction. Desperately I wanted it. At the auction it made four times what I could afford. The buyer did not move in however. There was a story about him being in prison. At this time the farmers used to dispose of waste straw after combining by burning it in the fields, a practice now banned. That's how the thatch caught alight. There was no attempt to fight the fire because no-one even noticed it. Gales later blew in the gable ends, then the chimney crumbled, brambles grew over it until there was hardly a visible trace of the place left.

I wish I could have saved it. It would have been beautiful. Instead I bought a little terrace, then a detached needing renovation, then the one we have today. I got what I wanted eventually, but I still think about that old place sometimes, and how I wanted it.
1.8k · Dec 2011
The Christmas Hijack
martin Dec 2011
What does Christmas mean to you?
Lots of parties, things to do
Presents to buy,friends to see
Got to get a Christmas tree

The lights are up, the decorations
Excitement grows, anticipation
The turkey's stuffed, ready to go
If we're lucky we may see snow

Get caught up in the Christmas mood
If you don't you're Mr Scrooge
Flash the card, splash some cash
Don't turn up drunk for midnight mass

But let's go back to days of yore
When our god was nature in the raw
A Pagan celebration there we find
A twelve day feasting known as Yuletide

Times have changed but traditions survive
In a slightly different guise
We'll follow suit and do just that
Like the druid and the bishop
We'll put on our Santa hat.
1.8k · Jan 2015
Handsome Nell (Robert Burns)
martin Jan 2015
Once I lov'd a bonie lass,
Ay, and I love her still;
And whilst that virtue warms my breast,
I'll love my handsome Nell.

As bonie lasses I hae seen,
And mony full as braw;
But, for a modest gracefu' mein,
The like I never saw.

A bonie lass, I will confess,
Is pleasant to the e'e;
But, without some better qualities,
She's no a lass for me.

But Nelly's looks are blythe and sweet,
And what is best of a',
Her reputation is complete,
And fair without a flaw.

She dresses aye sae clean and neat,
Both decent and genteel;
And then there's something in her gait
Gars ony dress look weel.

A gaudy dress and gentle air
May slightly touch the heart;
But it's innocence and modesty
That polishes the dart.

'Tis this in Nelly pleases me,
'Tis this enchants my soul;
For absolutely in my breast
She reigns without control.
for Burns night
1.7k · Sep 2012
At the cattle market
martin Sep 2012
Jim and Jill on market day
Watch a gret ol' bull hev his way

"Do you look at that now Jim,
Why can't you be more like him?"

"Well," said Jim, "there's a difference now-
He don't stick to the same old cow."
Another adaptation of an old country joke, again inspired by Raj.
1.7k · Jul 2012
Terracotta town
martin Jul 2012
We awake to morning sounds
Of pavements washing down
Everyone's a trader
In this terracotta town

Wander through the winding streets
Drink in sights and sounds
A trader or an artist
In this terracotta town

Time to find a slice of shade
Siesta hour has come around
All is quiet, all is still
In this little tourist town

The waiters they are waiting
No-one wears a frown
Everybody holds a stake
In this their terracotta town

The fishermen are coming in
The sun is going down
We hold onto a painted pebble
To remind us of the peace we found
1.7k · Jan 2013
I love you Senor!
martin Jan 2013
A Massey Fergie tractor
An old VW beetle
A worn out pair of boots
Manuela the 3 legged dog, and Senora
In their humble tumble home

The small concession to modern life
Just a mobile phone

Nothing special here
No status or wealth is evident
I love you Senor Mujica!
You do not change your way of life
Just because you're President
The president of Uraguay to be specific.
A former revolutionary and long term political prisoner,
he gives away 90%  of his salary.  Google him!
1.7k · Nov 2011
Antarctica
martin Nov 2011
I love my work, I love my dogs
I love my wife, I love my life
It's not that I don't want to stay
But I'm looking for adventure
So I have to go away.

I'll never say I'm cold again
Not after being here
The stars will  never shine so bright
The air will never seem so clear.

Not many people witness this
It's not a people place
Where the sun stays up all day and night
And the earth meets outer space.

There's not much food down here,
Just krill and fishy treats
No vegetables will ever grow
And you can't go out to eat.

Some say this  place will drive you mad,
Nothing but ice and snow
Others that it gets to you
Like nowhere else they know.

Now I'm ready, soon I go
To the cold round bottom of the globe.

I will be busy, but there may be times
In those quiet moments that I find
To sit and reminisce
About the other cold round bottom that I miss
The one I left behind.
Rob has gone to the British Antarctic Survey base as a mechanic for 15 months. He reports that a white Christmas is looking likely.
1.7k · Aug 2012
Athletic
martin Aug 2012
Did you see that Usain Bolt
The surname sure fits there
Yeah, not bad thinks Dusty dog
But can he catch a hare?

That long jump champ, well done mate
You're better than the rest
But any Ozzie joey
Would hardly be impressed

Those divers, back flips in the water
Splashing two by two
Any dolphin anywhere
Could make you look like fools

So it is with everything
Try as hard  we might
Mind, I've not seen anything
Go quite as quick by bike
If I raise a smile
It's all been well worthwhile
1.7k · Mar 2012
Cuckoo, miss you, miss you
martin Mar 2012
We miss you cuckoo, miss your song
At this time of year
Once, we heard you all day long
Now gone, for good I fear

But we have a substitute
Harbinger of spring
The humble little chiff-chaff
Proclaiming loud and clear

Truth to tell he always did
But now the cuckoo's gone
The little brown job got promoted
We're holding him more dear

Keep singing tiny chiff-chaff
Come back again next year
Escape the winter's chill in Africa
Come springtime, re-appear
Once widespread, the cuckoo is now a rare bird in my area.
1.7k · Jan 2012
The Iron Lady
martin Jan 2012
You're working for a woman now he said
I thought a bit, scratched my head
You've got it wrong, how can that be?
It's she who's working now for me.

She promised truth and faith
Hope and harmony.

Her faith was tested early on
To set our people free
And wrestle back our islands
In the southern sea.

With Ronnie Reagan in a golf cart
She found her harmony
In front of all the cameras
Together for eternity.

She stood up to the unions
Never giving way
She set the miners free
Took their hopes away.

They tried to **** her at the Grand
They all so nearly died
But she was out next morning
Defiant in true grit, very much alive.

But now the iron lady's lost her wits
Her intellect is shot to bits
She starts to speak but half way through
Can't remember who is who.

The iron lady's lost her touch
Her brain they say has gone to mush
Back in the day some called her great
A woman no man should underestimate.

The iron lady's had her time
Now condemned to slow decline
From all she could command respect
Now not love nor hatred, just neglect.
Old friends, her children absent somehow
The iron lady's lonely now.
1.7k · Dec 2011
She was only 15
martin Dec 2011
She was only 15, no boyfriends yet
At a family gathering their eyes first met
Now Rob's not shy, with plenty of chat
So he gave her a call and they never looked back.

She went to Cambridge to get her degree
So every weekend, so did he.

When that was all done, what's next to do?
No more travelling, just me and you
In a cottage in Framsden made for two

With ferrets and fish and a couple of dogs
Oka cooks happy meat while Rob chops logs
A veggie garden appeared for a spell
A few came up, but the weeds did well.
Some chickens arrived and did their thing
Then so did the fox to commit his sin.

Now Rob loves his hobbies, it gets on her wick
When he's in his shed fiddling with his welding stick.
But life is quite settled, time passes like this
Living their version of unmarried bliss.

But something is missing, the feeling grows
She thinks to herself, will he ever propose?
Then leap year comes round, with it's extra day
That was her chance to have her say

Rob knew it was coming, he took the day off.
She said I want to be married, now don't you scoff!
But Rob wasn't scoffing, he said now I'm sure
I do love my Landie, but I love you more.

That brings us right up to this special day
We all wish you well, we all want to say
May your lives together be happy, healthy and long
May your love for each other keep growing strong.
(Landie is Land Rover, like Jeep just in case you didn't know.) This was my tribute to my step daughter and her man on their wedding day.
1.6k · Feb 2017
Rosene, a song
martin Feb 2017
I was just a lonely boy
And always had I been
The world became a kinder place
When first I met Rosene

She had the most enchanting smile
That I had ever seen
My heart jumped like a salmon's leap
When first I loved Rosene

We lived together many years
That now seem like a dream
Our children grew and then they flew
To tend their pastures green

She fought as hard as she could fight
But fate was cruel and mean
The world became a poorer place
The day we lost Rosene
1.6k · Nov 2012
Bill Millin
martin Nov 2012
There was a Scots soldier, Bill Millin
The sound of his bagpipes was thrillin'
The Germans thought how sad-
The poor man's quite mad-
We'll not waste a bullet on him then
Limericks are usually light-hearted, this one not so much.
The tradition of going to war playing morale-boosting bagpipes was forbidden in the British army during the 1914-18 war as it tended to attract enemy fire. On June 6th 1944 however, Bill Millin was ordered to play the pipes on Sword beach as the D-day landings were in full swing.
He escaped injury because the German gunners, deciding he was completely bonkers, did not fire on him.  He died aged 88 a couple of years ago.
1.6k · Nov 2012
Full moon
martin Nov 2012
Like a shining sixpence perfect cloud
Why waste your light at bright noon day?
For when darkness cloaks us with her shroud
Who will light our way?
1.6k · Oct 2014
Plus c'est la même chose
martin Oct 2014
Scientists tell us
Before the BIG BANG!
There was no time

Plus ça change...
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