There was a young man from Ceylon                                    Another man from Sri Lanka
Whose turkey went on and on                                                Penned an original tanka
Each piece on his plate                                                            ­ With himself he was pleased
He dutifully ate                                                              ­           But his friends they just teased
Till every morsel was gone                                                       And called him a silly old....wally


Turkey in soup, turkey in curry,turkey in sandwiches when in a hurry,turkey for breakfast,turkey for tea, fed up with turkey soon I shall be. Ways to eat turkey different and clever, man this turkey goes on for ever. Can we have something else now please, put the rest in containers to freeze.

How can I put into few words
What we think of her?

How can I say in just a few lines
How proud she has made us, so many times?

She is just a woman, but so much more
             A figure head
                         Ambassador
                                   Diplomat
                                           Sovereign bold

And like a sovereign
Worth much more
Than her weight in gold

Chestnuts roasting by an open fire
Stories gather round to tell
I almost sat too close to it
And roasted mine as well

Away in a manger
No crib for a bed
All the nice hay
Smells of ***** instead

Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Make the yuletide gay
But if Santa's eyeing up your chimney
Send him on his way

I'm dreaming of a quiet Christmas
With every panic out of sight
May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Christmases be just right

Cold and dark the solstice night
But shadows dance inside by candle-light
Pampered spruce holds centre stage
Calendar counts down the days

Festive holly berries red, mistletoe with white
Cards suspended on a string, flashing fairy lights
All is quiet in the house
Nothing stirs except...a mouse

He has no fear
Of cat or trap or carving knife
On his mind is something nice
Perhaps a chocolate-covered nutty treat
Beneath the Christmas tree to eat

Tonight no usual pickings poor
Of meagre breadcrumbs on the floor
For tonight he dines like a king
On fruit and nuts, dates and cake
A little bit of everything

All the Drambuie chocolates he ****** dry
He could not stop, he knew not why
Then he passed out on the floor
One hung-over little mouse, his head so very sore

Comes round every morning
           No days off
           What a star

-       icing sugar snow       -
like dusting on a mince pie
-        very seasonal            -

Chemistry that's a start
History broken heart
Geography been around
Current affairs lost and found

Politics no nasty shocks
Anatomy got the lot
Philosophy will it fit
Astrology if you believe in it

English Lit Great Expectations
English Lang communications
Mathematics work it out
Music we could twist and shout

Psychology games to play
Economics I can pay
Algebra think of walking
Poetry now you're talking