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Mustafa Mars Nov 2013
Bliss were your kisses
Never felt before
Warm were the words
I've never heard from you
Sweet were the dreams
Where you always appeared
Horrid were the times
I was forced to wake up
It's been awhile since I posted. Been busy with school and moving. I'm hoping I can get back on here on a daily basis.
Mustafa Mars Sep 2013
Prey upon my mind like it's your holy grail
Cause you understand that I'm one of a kind
Can never be replaced in your eyes
Always around in desperate times
Your personal counselor when you can't take the world
The shining light that lifts your world
Into the wonderland of dreams
Where things are so supreme-ly splendid
And you won't remember what you did
Where you can enjoy an endless bliss
Better than that first kiss
Or a granted wish that you've always wanted
I'm your guide to the slide of your lie of a life
That you can't seem to keep straight
Here to give you the words you need so that you can remain
Sane without gain of pain that's been trained
To maintain a stained identity strained into your mind
Smiling cause you can't gather the strength
Cause life seems to want to hurt you
And only you
But give everyone else a wonderful time...
work in progress.
Mustafa Mars Aug 2013
boxed in with no place to go
stuck with the chaos that was spun out of nothing
my life has become a shadow of what once was
my being split into two
the light
trying to see the good in the world
feeling the love that was once abundant in me
showing mercy to others and
keeping hope alive
the shadow
a force of negativity
embracing the anger that was shelved away from everyone
punishing people for no reason
other than a sadistic joy
neither feels complete
both requiring an equal balance
just so they can feel fulfilled
both wanting the same thing
humanity
light wants to see what lies withing the darkness
but only illuminates
dispersing all shadows from its sight
shadow only wants to feel the warm embrace of the light
never wanting more than to warm its frozen heart
both want what can't be obtained
both want equilibrium
but cannot grasp it without the feeling of humanity
light
shadow
my subconscious mind cannot grasp their pain for long
attempting to block out their cries
trying to remain whole
but always feeling fractured
broken because of the life that has been lived
my mind tries to hold light and shadow together
waiting for someone who can fix what has been disconnected for a long time
Mustafa Mars Jul 2013
This is my fantasy
I play the hero
You my damsel
I protect you
You comfort me
We love each other
*Until the end of time
Everyone has a little fantasy they play in their head...
Mustafa Mars Jun 2013
I'm not in a Genesis crisis
But I am in somewhat of a bind
Stuck behind the kind shield of my mind
struggling to overcome the pain so that I can move forward in life
Can't you see I want to move on?
I want to get a new love life
But the strife that strikes me like a knife just stops me
I want to tell her what I really want to
But I'm stuck believing I'll never be up to standards too great
Why must I keep myself down
Like a clown inside an empty town
Why can't I just tell the truth
And say you're cute
Instead of being mute
Or trying to refute a past statement
Don't you care that I'm hurting?
Why am I so focused on a past
That never lasts
Unless it's fast in the mind
And tries to wrap itself around me like a cast
Why do I have to feel the constant torment
While you get to move on
As if nothing occurred
I get to be stuck in the Limbo of relationships
while you can casually move on to the next guy
Who will inevitably break you down to my level
I see your pain and take it as my own.
I'm just a sucker
I could never let you stay down on that level
I'd rather take your pain
So that you can gain a sane point of view
I'll sacrifice my own sanity
For the betterment of everyone else
Just so I can understand why I can't move on from that past
When I see you, I smile.
I think I finally understand
Why I could never stand
After that day
I lost a part of me
That was meant to be free to see the sea of belief
I lost that part of me to the chaos of love
Only because it wanted me to climb from darkness into light
So that I would never see this as a blight on life
Is it possible for me to tell you?
Now I'm stuck in the Limbo of doubt
But I have hope on my side
To hopefully provide me with
A new stride for my inner kind guy
I can move forward
Without fear of losing my life again
Mustafa Mars Jun 2013
I have hit a point in my life where my poetry is no longer evolving
I write and I write
But it always ends up the same.
No new ideas
No new conception
Just the same poem over and over
It's like I've lost my personal muse to the world outside
And I can't find her anywhere
I've lost the spark that would help me come up with idea after idea
And I just decided that it was okay
Because I grew up from it
I've lost all the inspiration from my childhood
All the joy, pain, anger
All the emotions that I put into my work
Gone as if they never even existed
Why can't I evolve my work anymore
Why do I have to watch with envy
As others create wonderful masterpieces
While I recreate a
One hit wonder from long ago
That everyone has seen too many times
But decide to take pity and read just to satisfy me
What did I do to lose my love
For the art that I first gather interest in
The art that made me think
The art that helped me express myself
Why must I always have a block
Where I can never finish a new piece
Where I just stop and wait to
Finish it later
Knowing I'll never come back to it
How did I become this lost poet
Who can't create work
Is forced to read others works
Who must realize his limit has been reached a long time ago
How can I call myself a poet
When I can't even create a unique poem...
Mustafa Mars Jun 2013
I love you
Love you I do
I possess love for you
My heart aches for you
My mind contemplates about you
My eyes want to see you
My voice wants to say your name
My lips want to touch yours

I don know why
But just the sheer thought of you
Makes me grin like an idiot
It makes no sense
But I never try to question it
Just knowing you makes me feel at ease
Talking to you makes my heart skip beats
And even though my eyes want to your beauty
I can never keep direct eye contact with you
My only solution for this great torment in me
Should be to write you

*I care about you so much
But I can't make this come true
Cause I just too afraid
To know what to do
Every time we talk
I just want to confess
But my heart always stops
And builds up stress
Why is it so hard for me to simply say
I love you
Why is it so very hard...
So I have love on my mind. Love, love, love.
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