From the depths of hell
Where I slowly fell
A deal made with the devil
As I started tossing pennies in a well

But the angels came and broke my fall
Saved me from sinking, down this hellhole
The life I sold is more precious than gold
That my friend is what I saw,life is now more clearer and bold

But after all upon throwing them all
Before the saving and breaking of my fall
I drowned in fame,money and ***
for 7 years I ruled the world as it rise to an apex

But then downfall and recollection came tormenting my soul
Hellhounds came gnarling,scratching and waiting at my bedroom door
Regrets starts falling alone with my tears as I prayed for salvation
Never thought God listened, As the angels descent ended my damnation

The devil is a salesman and you're a valued costumer
Starts thinking 7 times before you go and starts to barter
For your soul is more precious than what you think you'll be having
God gave me a second chance never thought my soul is worth saving

Don't cry for me
don't smile for me
because no one can see
the people beneath
these masks that we wear
to hide our pain, but
when we find someone who cares
the masks start to break
and fall apart
when someone happens
to touch your heart,
and see's your inner beauty
maybe they'll say,
"Hey aren't you a cutie"
the pain is gone
and it will stay away
it's gone for a while
at least for today...

and inside i was a tide
but all they saw were barely ripples
and inside i was screaming
but no one heard me begging there

And inside i was a mess
but they decided that my hair was neat
and that i was already clean
because they didnt see the shadows lurking under my eyes
or the dust collecting in my thoughts

and when i wasnt even hiding
when i knelt down and prayed
you said that you were always there
but you never dared to answer me

because i am still ******* here
and though i beg for you to let me go
i wake up and my heart still beats...
i thought you were always listening

and inside i was dead
how i wished that the outside
would show it

And i needed to voice my thoughts
but if i did, you would worry
so my thoughts shall remain thoughts
and my voice will stay voiceless

I am tripping on a corner watching the whole world spin;
As I wrap myself with smoke, the suicidal taste of nicotine
When boredom strikes casting me my final moment of doom;
Eventually I realize things are redundant as I lock myself in this room

What a beautiful way to live life only to feel you're dying;
So shut the hell up my friend!Stop preaching we both know you're lying
Bearing the cross, carrying the weight of the world on my shoulder;
Holy mother of christ it gets worst as I get older...

My dreams turns to a living nightmare everyday I hang my ambition to this gallows;
I sentence me to death!Taking away my existence so the rest will follow
Never before I contemplate what's with the issues I'm having I gladly surrender;
In the cold embrace of death in the name of thy father, the son and the holy spirit may I shall be remembered

Hail, dreamcatcher, hear now my thoughts
Free my soul of fond hopes of naught;
Of brokenness these dreams had taught;
Of ceaseless pain this life has brought.

This heart is weary of shouting;
Of being empty yet drowning
In insipid words befuddling;
In ashed promises succumbing.

**** this anguish feasting inside
That this shiv may be put aside;
These damp sheets be given a rest,
And that may bliss in this room nest.

Hail, dreamcatcher, hear now my sigh,
The words I'll mutter as lie
Below the grass, hear my cry;
My soliloquies ere I die.

The dreams that I wove with your strings
Are dreams that 'til I slumber clings;
Dreams that on stars I'll be wishing
That I with the stars be dreaming.

Farewell to you, dear moon, I say
Awake I can no longer stay
In peace on this bed I shall lay,
Never again shall I rise, I pray.

So dreamcatcher croon me to sleep
And let me drown in thoughts so deep
Don't wake me up, I had enough
Last wish: I be gone in a puff.

I did a fine job this time
Mucking up my own thoughts spiraling me down
To the pitfalls of logic
Where I loose the poet
And attach the analytic mind straight to the brain
Forego the heart
Snip it like some bothersome string attached to my favorite shirt
But here is where I wake
And realize that though logic and rhetoric help the structure of the self
The spirit is starving behind those cold bars
Scared to come out lest it be cut once more
Violated like a child
Helpless to the mindless bumbling oafish screams of listless beings
Whom's only goal is to crush it
Maim it to something other that what it is
Taper it's wings
And stunt the flexing whiles of its witless abandon
Oh how it shone
That beautiful fluctuating penumbra of brilliance
That taps into the ether and brings forth light and wonder
Abandoning my skepticism at least for now I bathe in the glory of freedom I have unbound

going through old memories of you. all the time wasted saying "I love you" but never showing it. I'm sick of writing about you, but I can't get what we had off my mind. now that I seem to be doing just fine, you are quite the opposite. unfortunately, I haven't the time to care. you broke me to pieces but I've mended myself. all you seem to be able to do is shatter yourself until all that is left is the scattered memory of us. I haven't forgotten and neither have you. when I look into your soulless eyes, all see is the emptiness you have inside you. but now that I am just a ghost to you, I'll let you walk right through me. I don't miss you, not anymore. I just remember. so goodbye for good, you're done haunting me. now all you're left with is your own demons.
m.c.