I step back and hand you the reins, to this, my sinking ship,

only truth knows lies, as it passes through you, your lips.

I struck a chord, or a nerve, it helps me value my worth,

desperate eyes have been searching for someone like you, since birth.

An idea that is formed in the minds of man,

You and I together - Fate had another plan.

I smile as sadness invades my pores,

Our mystery and intrigue, your beauty the stuff of Lore.

For comfort, I whisper your name at night,

It gets me through the darkness until that morning light.

My eyes renewed, a new day has begun,

you, before me, until the setting of the sun.

I reach for your hand, to secure it in place,

the life of past loves, gone without a trace.

A wall made of words, my past: my mortar,

the time that we have only gets shorter.

The days fly by, just gone in a flash,

tomorrow becomes yesterday, our forever past.

Late nights spent together, asleep in each other's arms,

all that I ask for, as you resist my charms.

Cautious you crept, and slowly you caved,

unsure still, based on past loves that you gave.

Greedy mind of mine, glued to your side,

instead I chose clever words, for my feelings to hide.

There’s a reason that they don’t intertwine,
head and heart, forever war, combustion and collide.

Stalemate, ever deserving,  declares a winner,
decided by the apathy from the hands of a sinner.

To each their own until it affects what we think should be ours,
a cloud of doubt that hangs low enough beneath the storms final hours.

Sleeping sickness surrenders all that’s good and leaving nothing to begin,
I’m in too deep, gone too far, the end is too close for me to start again.

Words caressed, increasing the impression of what’s printed on my heart,
A level of compassion only exists in the form of scandalous figures and charts.

My life’s purpose seems to accommodate comedy,
sips here and gallons there, picking its poison to make itself somebody.

There are days that happen where I’d love to live in my blankets,
and others still where I can’t believe the opportunities I’ve missed.

Feed me knowledge, carefully place me there at the learning edge,
Little victories demonstrating anguish against such large defeats,
back against the wall, I do all that I can to honor my pledge,
a humbled and broken vestige of former self I’d rather not meet.

Concrete plans laid bare, gardens growing, hiding something that was never there,
this life has a tendency to always be unfair.

I loved you yesterday- I just didn’t know it then.

when the wind whistled and brushed the branches against the shed,

that was when I put the image of you and I in my head.

I loved you today, and I didn’t realize it then,

As new snow fell, it reminded me that no two flakes are alike,

and our similarities are ghost like, existing between worlds.

I loved you tomorrow, and I’m realizing it even now,

I swore at the ******* morning birds singing their song,

and it reminded me of you in the mornings and how i’m always wrong.

I loved you since I can remember, and it’s apparent now,

from the moments that as a baby I took my first steps,

sometimes cruel and calculated, they led me to you.....somehow,

I loved you in my early years, and I never put it together,

since I could form sounds and words, it was to tell you “I love you.”

I’ll love you light years from now, when our bodies are busted and turned to dust,

I’ll hold each memory of us failing and succeeding together and all of our trust.

I love you in the here and now, with each mistake being almost enough for me to break,

it’s us, it’s you, it’s everything that falls in between yesterday, today, and tomorrow that I can take.

I loved you yesterday, I love you today, and I will love you tomorrow.

I've been told that dead men don't tell tales,
but even worse are those that live and scream out truth through their wails.

A bleeding heart stored on the cusp of each evenings glow,
I clap my hands at this life's end, such a terrible show.

There's pressure planted at the base of each king's throne,
a different taste, desire and let down for something more homegrown.

A rupture in space through the waves of one heart mimic,
harder and harder to face life's twists and turns by setting unreal limits.

I picture time leaned back, relaxing; testing its own struggle,
a few more breaths, here and there, is what I'm trying to smuggle.

The end of days has a commonality with that of a dial tone,
both calling out, trying to be heard, but ultimately dying alone.

Evicted emotions are the envy and the end-all of the wax and wane,
forgive and forget so that in the near future you can fall prey the same.

Disregard feelings like a dusty souvenir sitting on a high shelf pawn shop,
push on, take names, and whatever you do, never retreat or stop.

Regurgitated fears as I choke back free flowing tears,
taking another crack at your misguided attack has set me back fifteen years.

Using your wit, a bit, you must admit has helped you climb the ladder,
but wholesome, and truthfulness, no, that's an entirely different matter.

There’s a reason that they don’t intertwine,
head and heart, forever war, combustion and collide.

Stalemate, ever deserving,  declares a winner,
decided by the apathy from the hands of a sinner.


To each their own until it affects what we think should be ours,
a cloud of doubt that hangs low enough beneath the storms final hours.

Sleeping sickness surrenders all that’s good and leaving nothing to begin,
I’m in too deep, gone too far, the end is too close for me to start again.


Words caressed, increasing the impression of what’s printed on my heart,
A level of compassion only exists in the form of scandalous figures and charts.

My life’s purpose seems to accommodate comedy,
sips here and gallons there, picking its poison to make itself somebody.


There are days that happen where I’d love to live in my blankets,
and others still where I can’t believe the opportunities I’ve missed.


Feed me knowledge, carefully place me there at the learning edge,
Little victories demonstrating anguish against such large defeats,
back against the wall, I do all that I can to honor my pledge,
a humbled and broken vestige of former self I’d rather not meet.


Concrete plans laid bare, gardens growing, hiding something that was never there,
this life has a tendency to always be unfair.

Solitude, in itself, is just another form of loneliness,
sometimes a faint smile is equal to forgiveness, I will confess.

A hundred wrong decisions, life shattered and splintered,
Cover me deeply, this coffin,  protecting me from the winter.

You can’t come here - you belong buried where heartaches seeks,
Hammer holds, reaching, bidding, pulling back life nails as they shriek.

Silence. Absolutely brutal, savage silence.
Darkness. Terrifyingly cruel, misquoted guidance.

There’s time for me yet, even as I bow at the last curtain call,
at the end of this life, no regrets, no mistakes, “I lived” as a reply all.

Minor memories stir up old trouble behind closed eyelids,
a silly mistake here, a proper reply there, it’s just what we did.

Shut out, bow down, a troubled childhood led to substantial grief,
Hold on, power through, persevere it’ll be brief.

Death held my hand which is such a sad way to live,
His bony fragmented clasp, helped me learn to forgive.

I’ve practiced what you preached, always hoping it was correct,
In the end, I was wrong, because it’s my life that you wrecked.

We stand there listening to our hearts increased pounding,

screams are no longer heard, they’ve left us to our drowning.

Your words encourage, lift up, and wash away all ire,

A mode of respect, a taste of morale victory that will always inspire.

Every future idea, a moment of consistent need,

all of your energy, attention, and efforts fuel my greed.

A hidden meaning presented in perfect plain sight,

a loose embrace, or hand held tight gets me through each night.

A way with words, and each syllable increased meaning,

the curve of these lips lift up a soul that’s comfortably beaming.

There’s a knock on Death’s door as you perform compression's,

A stable stream of stagnant lies that helped cover me in depression,

some half-truths, and even more half-measures,

have led me to reduce my self worth and avoid most pleasures.

Then there’s you: a light-wielding saint with unmatched power,

a simple word, or look helps raise me up in my darkest hour.

You are warm and welcoming, a shelter for my deepest hurt,

a shovel fit to bury each woe and regret under a world of dirt.

I closed my eyes for the final time, or so I thought,

but god ****** me this morning, as my vision, the sun's rays caught.

We circle the days that we look forward to with invisible ink,

trigger finger, coping mechanism, drink this lead so you won't sink.

Imagine images colored all the same, pictured differently,

trying to take away the pain.

A mistake was made the day that I was claimed, revolving melodies,

that all just trade away.

Hope evolves, and then there's me not believing in evolution,

"clean up your life," but I'm just that forever pollution.

Life lives and death dies,

another day goes by and my existence is surprised.

Tempt with discovery, a new needle-tongued lie,

close my eyes, embrace the darkness, because tomorrow we will "survive."

Cling to the good, the best, maybe my childhood?

You'd think there'd be something there, a joy, a love, I wish I could.

Broad brush painting black thin lines,

Second-Hand clock retreating, trying its hardest to turn back time.

It's stuck, my luck, right here in the un-divine,

a holy disaster unfolds as this ball of yarn unwinds.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have ears to hear, dear,
eyes that'd be lost in a sea of salt water, effects unfounded, I fear.
I tried to multiply the designation of landed blows,
and where and when the next one happens, I'll never know.

A cushion of comfort, radius rewinding,
a stinging snakebite, un-healing, somehow reminding.
A breath, deep, swallowing rationality,
a misguided answer, pointing towards practicality.

Keep me bound, claws fixed in a fury,
bury me deep, cover these wounds in a hurry.
Pick up pieces of me leaving, chase me down as I'm retrieving,
draw a hundred different pictures, one broad brush I'm heaving.

Hands white, outlined in chalk,
Heart dark, filled in with hate-fueled talk.
Picture-perfect, broken camera, eyes red,
hate me now and love me yesterday after I'm dead.

Healing process exists, but I maybe missed the bus.
A broken cough, signs I'm sick, blink of an eye on the cusp.

Comfortable in my confusion, cracked inside, depleted confusion,
defense of the heart, standing ground, shaking like two hearts' fusion.

Peel back, layered doubt, insisting on eternity,
Feelings lack existence, doubt buried here, uncertainty.


A fever, no a glow; Contagious? Severe? Let's go slow.

Fingers pace, twitching, life force leaving as I try to trace your face,

This isn't the place, bloodstained wonder, journal falling from an unsteady bookcase.

I read and bleed as you write about my wrongs,
A subtle stab in the not-so-dark as I try to right my wrongs.

I pretend to be happy, but each smile drops my days by one,
Begging for a shiny new thing, trade in for one that's more fun.

There's a case, a cause for a ringing alarm,
Everyone is safe - save for me, there's harm.

There's the way you make me feel,
and that's the other side of how I heal.

Snake-tongued intent, kindness it seems, forfeit.
If there's nothing left there, I can't force it.

A pool of melted memories flows down to the ground,
we enter this earth so loud, yet leave without a sound.