I’m just that - your favorite pair of jeans, loose fitting at times when need be,
I’m your favorite worn-out shirt, snug in all the right places with faded colors that beam with familiarity.

I’m your decision - the good, the bad, the in between.
like failing, falling, magnets when the attraction is gone.

I tried to tell myself that it was fine,
Humbled and hollowed at the thought that you’d be mine.

I offered what I had it wasn’t much....it was everything.
I’m like your favorite song that just gets old as shoulders slump and you respond to the chorus cringing.

I’m the least of your worries, the let down was there from the start,
We’re false flames ignited, I’m just a stain mistaken for art.

I’m the deepness, the darkness the choice and your chore,
I’m the writhe, the angst, the agony - a cancer and nothing more.

There’s you. ******* there’s you, shining, wrecked, yet flawless,
I’m every mistake that’s ever been made, ashamed at the power you possess.

I’m your favorite quote, present, and reliable.
I’m a flame extinguished, burned out, a future not quite viable.

I’m your final missing piece, bent and broke,
Sawed off, devoured, with nothing more than missing strokes.

I’m your energy, fainting and forever fleeting,
I’m a backstory. A “what if”. A possibility that you may not ever be needing.

The night does so little to appease my discomfort,
tremendous darkness; “here, hold onto these nightmares as a last resort.”

Whimpers only server to wake memories and practical mistakes,
kind eyes and a crowded heart, a good person this does not make.

You, the dry grass - my intentions the burning and the falling ember,
there’s magic somewhere there between us, the key is just trying to remember.

Innocent eyes lead me to believe in vintage dreams that die,
I picked the perfect poison, it’s no longer a matter of choosing sides.

I salvaged suicide; burdened and buried beneath another’s lies.
One soul crushed, it was never enough, between the waves and tides.

I’ll try my best to pick up pieces of myself that I left for dead,
I tried everything that I could to paint a picture with words instead.

I’ve encased repressed disasters, situated, ‘in case”,
a well placed stab in the dark, is still blindly swinging in place.

Retreat, I say, retreat. It’s a desire I wish I didn’t have to repeat,
curious decision, insipid revision, in boredom this cancer did secrete.

There’s a ballroom breaking, barking and demanding order from footsteps falling,
hide my hand in the comfort of your palm, it’s pressing, love lingering and mauling.

I’ve cradled our future, torn between the broken and drowning,
you are the special, the heathen, the dead Queen that we’re never crowning.

I’m pushing and praying for any signs of a pulse,
fidgeting thoughts, a conclusion proven false.

Hope  has its heroes, like buoyancy in the event of a flood,
eventuality digs in, like being at the bottom of sinking sands and mud.

Shock and awe at the distress and unrealistic expectations that flow from your jaw,
balanced beliefs, with envy of the sky, theories set aflame like straw.

I’m begging now, here in the deep; sleepless in the dark,
I want what I already have, a blazing fire when i’m missing the spark.

Revived memories, dying, pushed off, on repeat, revived memories,
Reach me - revile me based on easy decisions and heathens stuck with treachery.

A supplemental divide, living there between heart and mind,  
If we threw our cares to the wind, and closed our eyes, I wonder what we’d find?

Imagine this: disaster in the form of false friendship, that - a sinking ship,
anxious awareness clutching barrels reserved for killing, loosen the grip.

If there’s a light on in the attic, then let me hear you scream through the static.

It’s finally here, the answer always living and unclear,
“I promise there’s nothing to fear my dear,” as we grow stagnant for another year.

Balled fists leveled by my sides, like autumn leaves hiding discolored lies,
in the face of folly, dismembered grief, relocates to my own surprise.

Hurt in every way. Kiss me and tell me to stay away.

We exist like this: in the form of an angry dream,
a flag that’s planted,  a form of feeding the hill.
pursuing pleasures, mistakes retraced are what keeps our hearts beating still,
pull me back, realign the lie, dictate the difference so that I can be more than I seem.

Life is there, swirled in between dead eyes and a furrowed brow,
confusion musters courage, leading to discreet secrets before now.

Pressures mounting, shadows bleeding, and hiding the end in sight,
grip is loosening, rapid breathing it’s the end we warranted without a fight.

Close those eyes, but open your mind, sin again, and put the good behind,
drifting desire, I’m a million pieces stuck together, screaming “one-of-a-kind.”

I’m a stain that’s spreading, a smile cloaked in grace,
a laugh that’s needy, when misfortune takes my place.

We exist like this: in the form of vicious wind the telling sign,
You, my stable, unending, desperate attempt to define.

In a way, you’re a world; creating liquid chaos through the vestige of paper cups,
in a moment, you’re hated, targeted, and placed on every list of individual distrust.

I’ve split the difference, in the end, what difference does it make?
A matter of perpetual indecision, you are my deepest dream while I’m wide awake.

Emboldened by heartfelt moments that were stolen,
we’re a pleasant breeze, a miracle in the making, turning a silver lining into something golden.

I’m pushing and praying for any signs of a pulse,
fidgeting thoughts, a conclusion proven false.

Hope  has its heroes, like buoyancy in the event of a flood,
eventuality digs in, like being at the bottom of sinking sands and mud.

Shock and awe at the distress and unrealistic expectations that flow from your jaw,
balanced beliefs, with envy of the sky, theories set aflame like straw.

I’m begging now, here in the deep; sleepless in the dark,
I want what I already have, a blazing fire when i’m missing the spark.

Revived memories, dying, pushed off, on repeat, revived memories,
Reach me - revile me based on easy decisions and heathens stuck with treachery.

A supplemental divide, living there between heart and mind,  
If we threw our cares to the wind, and closed our eyes, I wonder what we’d find?

Imagine this: disaster in the form of false friendship, that - a sinking ship,
anxious awareness clutching barrels reserved for killing, loosen the grip.

If there’s a light on in the attic, then let me hear you scream through the static.

It’s finally here, the answer always living and unclear,
“I promise there’s nothing to fear my dear,” as we grow stagnant for another year.

Balled fists leveled by my sides, like autumn leaves hiding discolored lies,
in the face of folly, dismembered grief, relocates to my own surprise.
Hurt in every way. Kiss me and tell me to stay away.

I’m the bland, the misguided misfit who is always “with the band,”
Feigning prestige, I’m nothing more than a coffee-carrying consumer,
I’m eager, yes, visibly excited even, to hide uncomfortable truths behind a stain of smiles.

Walk with me. A mile in my shoes; follow the trail of tread wearing down like my patience for the songs of the dead..
Listen closely, purge evil intentions from distant futures.

Culture has clouded my judgement, raised and reared like a starving artist, fighting against nature and nurture for my next meal.

Peel. Layers laughed as you ripped again and again into each one, never reaching the source or your full potential.

Essential. Liquid love, your words entomb practical promises deep inside of me where the truth hurts the most.

“I don’t think I can ever love someone again,” I whispered to myself; remembering to practice what I preach. “Not since the last person let me down.”

It was me. I tried to love myself, but it was like grasping at straws that fates fire had decided to light aflame.
Blame. It is me; gifted in ways that matter to none. “Remember, there’s someone,” But.. what if I were honest and told you there were none?

Bliss sometimes comes in the form of a kiss that we missed. Lips locked in a battle that should have never began.

I hate you for this. I love you for that. Let’s just skip to the end, and end this. Reach for the stars so that when you fail, you’re high enough to fall to your death.

Tell me, once again, how “I’m everything you never wanted” with your final breath

Memories ghosted, thinly veiled, tied together with heartfelt broken strings,
time bombs eating away and brilliant brain cells, persuading unnatural things.

Step up, reset - hold it together so we can predict everything that can destroy,
steadfast, unsteady rise, there’s no use anymore in being coy, just state your ploy.

Intertwining, relentless, ruthless and ever-dividing,
take my hand in yours, suffocate myself to stop the whining.

A solar system crashing and you’re my world that’s ending,
these last days, our final moments, ashamed that this is now pending.

Make me cringe, unloving and precious in a sacrificial way,
they force permanent chalk outlines for the only reason to stay.

Take notes, tabs, apply unending units of measure,
place doubt, exercise caution and fearless when led to blind pleasure.

A passion poisoned by hints of the afterlife,
beguiled by moments, pleasantries turned rife.

Take hold, slipping grasp, mere moments for a chance to last,
Heaven holds its head in my arms, with life gone too fast.

Kaleidoscope impact, vision distorted with a colorful retort,
violence in the form of a multiple choice question as a last resort.

Purchased ignorance, adolescent regression in an unfamiliar form,
thunderous applause, and lightning quick remedy as a pause for the storm.