What doesn't **** you makes you stronger,
at least that's how the adage goes.
But it fails to mention how strength can be shrouded in woe.

Sometimes what failed to **** me makes me
bitter
untrusting
and quick to rage.

On the days where sadness permeates the air,
Where the only thing I can feel is despair,
I find myself wanting you here, not there.
Wishing for your shoulders to share in the burden,
hoping for some wisdom,
to ease in the hurting.
But then I hear a songbird chirping,
and the sweet sound of chiming bells,
and I know you're here wishing me well.

When I was younger, I refused exiting a car unless the song was done,
I sat, eyes wide, under the sky
watching clouds,
watching stars,
letting them fill me with wonder, warm with light.
When I was younger, but older still,
I met a boy.

He told me keep walking,
never taking his eyes off the ground.
For to him the sky was just sky,
the clouds were just clouds.
And a song was only ever just that, a song.
After a while, I believed him.

Today, I sat in my car.
Bass booming, late for work, but I didn't care.
I wanted to watch the clouds,
I needed to finish the song.

It’s said a smile shows warmth, confidence.
But in the animal kingdom,
to show your teeth is a sign of aggression,
or predatory intent.
But they’ll say that’s just happenstance,
and act shocked at what happens next.

Toxic things, nightmare dreams
None of them meant a thing.
I want you, you don't want me,
So round,
         round,
            merrily go round.
down,
    down,
down we go,
   down,
       down,
           down the rabbit hole.

Your words hollow, much like your head.
I can no longer believe any words said.
For actions speak much more truthful,
and eloquently than your mouth.
Within them, I suspect, the truth is truly found.

I've been told
No one loves the girl so openly critical of the world.
So Romeo, oh Romeo
stay far, far away
There isn't much to explain,
that girl and I,
we are one and the same.
A collection of mixed up,
once shattered,
broken shards.
Carefully glued back together,
not looking to be broken again.