dreams last for so long

I am going to get words tattooed
all over my body

"Busy is a choice. Stress is a choice. Joy is a choice. Choose well."

forgive your brother not seven times
but seventy times seven.

I have aged a hundred years

I scan my past and find nuggets and cold gems
of things I didn't see while they were there
but now, because I didn't pluck them up and keep them
for myself when they happened initially-
my history now looks like a glittering treasure.

if you only asked what I wanted from you
the answer is no more or less than what you can give me
but you didn't ask.

lights will guide you home

some dreams never do come true
some love doesn't hit the target

You're still tired of me and
I'm not ******* treating you as anything more than a stranger
you're barely an acquaintance now.
Are you happy now that we don't speak?
Isn't that what you wanted?
You dislike me and fine,
I'll ignore you, if you return the favor.
I have other friendships to **** up,
with people that actually give a **** about me.

I look out and see a different life than the one I had left

I too have secrets and corners of my mind too dark to wander into
but we all do
and the sculpture of our hearts
wouldn't be the same without its highs and lows
bright places and shadows

I dreamed that I was at camp
but the strings and the ropes were there
pulling me empty, leaving me home.

spring has the world drunk and halfway dizzy with joy
I can hardly see reality for spinning

you don't realize how little of someone you need
until they are gone forever
and you don't forget how much of someone you need
until they are there all the time

He stays home from work this time
He never really told his wife
He never really told a lie but this time he decides that it's alright.
It's alright.
No one really knows his mind and no one knows behind his eyes.
The man deserves a medal
But he's never really won a prize before.
He goes to lock the door.

He is falling in love
He knows it's enough
And the world looks down and frowns.

do you realize my uniqueness?

you can be who you need to be
and I'll let you,
because I love you.
and that's all.

I can breathe for the first time

I don't want less of you, I just don't want you in the way you want me to.

"I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance."

"man always has two reasons for what he does: a good one, and the real one"

some days you're with your friends screaming along to your new favorite song ******* up the words but enjoying it and feeling like you could cry or die or just make pies all day
and some days it's eleven o clock and you're alone in the Applebees parking lot smoking a cigarette on the verge of tears but you won't cry because it's not exactly sad it's just ****** up and nothing is like the movies anymore.

a new soul is the most free of them all
because she has not yet learned to be scared of her own depths.

but I don't even know half of you

what used to be warm in your eyes looked like it had been hardened by something

let me give you my life

I'm on my way back to God
I think I need to start addressing my prayers
and thoughts- rather than
to 'Him', this objective thing
that I'm just thinking about,
to 'you', 'father', 'abbah', someone
that I am talking to.

I say 'this feels different' every time, don't I
but I have stumbled upon something that sets this apart
a very small detail that implies a very big change
I can't touch myself thinking of you.
it seems as though you've buried yourself too deep in my mind
all I can see is our laughter and your goofy grin
I find myself sitting here smiling to the dark room
laughing alone, and I feel guilty because you're not here,
maybe you're not a crush I'm objectifying any more,
maybe I get it now,
I understand WHY the rules are what they are, this time,
because to touch myself thinking about you
uses you, it takes something golden and makes it tarnished
takes a picture of it rather than having it here
it makes you less than you are-
I can't ignore the whole of you rather than parts I want
I have to love all of you, and I am finally equipped to do it
and I would much rather be touching you, than myself.

my every waking moment is more than you know it is
get inside my head, I dare you
and then tell me what it is you think of me

maybe love is when they're the only one who
isn't driving you crazy

how can you be in love with
something that is the opposite
of all you've ever loved?

I like this

when and at what point did my childhood end?

Tyler? Joseph? Caleb? Mark? Max? David? John? Zack? Dylan? Cole? Blake? Gabriel? Michael? Eric? Alex? Logan? Jack? Luke? Chris? Daniel?

even though it feels like just a dream,
and though I'll try and erase it from my mind,
and though the feelings are fading,
my body will never forget
how yours felt
laying next to mine
as I fell asleep holding you.

life's good.
be at peace.
the flow of the heavens can go on without you.
just accept it as it is,
and breathe love.

I would love to have some silence, some time away from myself

the "thank you God" erupted from my being like a reflex
when I finally understood.

how do I pick myself up
I don't know how to get out of this
I am nothing but ashes

"Love people for all of them, not just the good or easy parts"

I don't want to fly off this cliff again
*my heart can't possibly break when it
was never even whole to start with

you can't measure the worth of a person by how fast they run the mile
you can't time how long it takes a person's heart to fall
or approximate the songs that run through their mind.
you can't put a number to the distance
their eyes have traveled,
or label, on a map, the tracks of their train of thought.
you can't measure the worth of a person,
but if I could measure you,
I'd find you first in all the world.

I used to wish you'd write sappy poems about me
and dream about me
and want to be with me
but I think
for you to be in love with me
would be out of character,
like Sherlock falling for John,
or Darcy and Elizabeth getting
together on the first try.
I don't want you to be out of character-
I want you to be YOU,
with or without me,
and that's enough.
you're wonderful as you are.

You don't need to look at me like that
like you're a little bit in awe
and my fingers are encased in sugar
my eyes are made of pure gold
lungs of diamond
Don't look at me like that
stop looking at me like that
No one's ever stared at me
and meant it
So don't do it
stop it
unless you mean it

please don't tell me what you think I have to do
because it's none of your business
what your righteous mind thinks is right or wrong
has nothing to do with my personal situation
I am not obligated to crucify myself because you think I should
I will only if my heart of love demands
and some things my heart of love must do
even if they seem wrong to you.

I like us like this

the world looks different today

we aren't so alone

why me? when did it become me?
and why not anyone else?