I thought of him
as a flickering of light
In the dark

But I think of you
as my day

My day before night,
through night
and through the rest
of my life

He made the dark bearable
You make it disappear
like an echoing sound
in the empty space of my soul

It seems in this life
there are those who sit still

and those who simply cannot
for the size of the world is too great,
the desire for more too strong,
the aching for change too wild to contain

Those left behind
can only try to forget the dawning of the end,
suppress the fear of wasting it,
shut out the noise of the tick tick ticking clock
on the dusty old windowsill

Find comfort over danger,
somewhere to rest their bones
safety over risk,
home

which seems easier because

Once we begin to search
We never return

Love
Is not only actions
It is intentions

Helping others
for a pretty reflection
is not love

Feeding on admiration as if
you're anything more
than human
is not love

Flowing golden with pride
until you believe your worth
five million dimes
is not love

You're full of impressions
not expressions

Humility, empathy, honesty,
will become the very soul
of your growth

that is, if you plant the seeds
and then you will learn love

It's time to say it
That cruel, senseless word
which hovers an uncertainty
of whether we will meet again

Goodbye,
to a whole world of possibilities
to a whole world of me
As I return with reluctance
to reality
where truths are like splinters
to what is easy
Where realistic and good
are faithful enemies
and I must choose
one,

and I can't do it alone
I'm blind for where to start
I can't see where to turn

So Goodbye,
It's been wonderful
I know I must be strong
Goodbye, to all the ropes which
I know must now be torn

Still, a space will linger
in the center of my heart
for all the friends,
memories,
faces

But most of all
the future,
for this
      is not goodbye.

It is easy to trust what is known

But to trust concept,
to rely consistently on the unknown
requires courage and grace
beyond human power,
outstretching the capacity of our heavy,
selfish hearts

So the fact that we try
is a remarkable riddle in itself
Thus, I am burdened to ask:

Why do we try
if there is nothing at all?

It hurts
that you don't notice
me in my bluest blue dress.

It is brisk
       It is brisk
  You are cold
     and I am melting

before you I flush
to my reddest of red
like the lipstick
     I wear
for you
    
It is brisk
             It is brisk
      and still
You don't notice.

Blind to my blue and my red
Whilst I stare a your
    silver and gold
and before you I melt
    to ashes and coal

and still you don't notice.
   Still I am blue
and the sky droops down
       over me,
           not you.
You are shining
     You are shining

You are the stars
I am the void
    in which you hang

You thrive
    even when you die
I still see you

But you are blind
     to my blue and my red.

Still,
    you don't notice.

It hurts
    that you don't notice.

It's hard to speak
when the quiet prevails

When the truth dawns
with all home entails

A storm strives to ****,
destroys my fragile soul

I call it 'home'
but it's not home at all

So I'll let my love for you abundantly flow,
I'll feel the same wherever you go.
Still sweeping the ash from where my heart sparked alive
under the stars,
under the stars.
My chest is sore,
you've made me raw,
I can't break out of this skin.
Let me go, let me go, let me go.

I am frozen in the vastness,
so far from you.

Though the bitter taste in my mouth might fade,
I'll miss you, I'll miss you. Always
your skin in the moonlight.
Always madness.

I woke up two nights ago,
a heavy weight in my chest,
knowing that you would leave

then I knew my heart was gone,
my rib-cage empty,
I stumbled to the door

In my fear I stared
into the ghostly sky of the city
Where no stars were hung

but I saw a plane above
which may have carried you
You, carrying my heart

They often say 'you stole my heart'
as if it was no choice
and yes, it was beyond my power,
this is a wondrous force
but I would give and give
three thousand times again
the vessel of my being,
the source of my existing,
the reason for my breathing
to you
because
you are this too

I don't believe I will get it back
any time soon.

The sky is old,
a new one dawns.
Across the world
are souls reborn.

Faces of pink,
pale and blue
no longer stiff from cold winter's grip.

Green now disperses,
rich in the earth.
Iciness fading,
lifting eyelids each morning,
hopefully waiting, waiting for Spring.

Eyes again bloom, glisten and gleam,
life-filled and bright as trees sprouting their leaves.
Our souls are since stretched, made bare by the cold,
now breathing fresh life
as restored is the old, the new, the rise and the fall of life's changes due,
the daily difference of the warm and the blue.

you loved me
to the sky
so much
that I might die

Why did you leave
Oh my, oh my
I am so afraid
that you like pie
more
than you love my eyes

Who am I?
Who do you want me to be?
I'll paint my face, cover
every inch with layers of
new because old's no
good. Of course you'll
never know.

There's no truth, no
sound or smile escaping my shell
which could tell you anything
true.

Is anything real?
We'll dance in costumes of
silver and gold and
never know a thing.
I'll give you my name,
splatter some words.
on a page or in the air,
what's the difference?

What does it tell?
You'll take the stage for
an hour or so,
give me your name which
wasn't your choice and
I'll judge you for all
you allow me to know.

Year after year we'll
talk about our day.
I'll cry in your arms.
You'll  tell me something
you've never told
anyone before.
     You'll study my every
inch and I yours
and we'll give all that
we can offer
     but never
   all that we own.

We could spend centuries
together but our
ever-changing souls
will never, ever know
any truth
as we know
ourselves.

We are blind,
always.