You find out
It gurgles to the surface
bubbles,
pops
You wipe your eyes
of the residue of my ghosts
The later it gets
Every face of pain begins to show
a haunting felowship

I succumb
roll around in graves of
vampire
monster
men
soils of  a strangled me

Flesh and all,
you pull me out of shallow ground
Resurrect and remind me
of the before

I sigh in your ear
Thank you,
my dear
I forgot about the her
Who is so near

It was in the wait
The gurgling spitting surface
Where I found myself

The alone

The trembling affliction
I salivated and salivated on
until I could finally swallow

Everything has dissolved

Do not get this confused with not having memory
My body has anologues of dialogues o

You reach your tiny arm out,
unable to sleep
Curled up under rib
I whisper to you

"Baby,
tell me your dreams."

"Popsicles
Frozen
Minnie Mouse
Lights
The song 'The Wheels on the Bus'
Reggie
Mamma holding my feet"

.I only dream of what affects you.

The last three months I awake
my *** is pillow
to your toddler cheek
I sacrifice sleep,
watching in AM wonder
You stuff
special blankey,
ferociously
into teeth
There is a tiny corner of fleece
you wrap around thumb
and rub to the tip of your nose
back and forth
A soothing swing
Material fluff rocks you to sleep

It is holy
to be your mother

I am still hell.

say "please" and "thank you"
"share, please"
"do not put that in your nose."

Sometimes I think
I want
to be
back in my body,
feeding you
holding time
You in my core, as baby
Then again
Who are we fooling?
Wild, tender Audrey
fearless flower
I am lucky to be the seed

I wait for the punchline
Curtain to cinch back
This nightmare
is an Oz of affairs
Emerald streets lead to hunter green tears
Ducts never dry
My voice hitch-hikes to my gravel road pain
Thumb points back to rib cage
There is no place like home
Sharp shame
Bone bars crumble when you ignore my name
This heart never stops with ruby red ache
There is not enough air
Inhale is at stake
You cast me as the wicked witch every time
I choke on every biting mistake.
The air remains a

You hold pink peaches
in the corner of your cheeks
Only in moments
where your words are withheld
I dig deep into your eyes
for the pit of your
passion
What a hypocrite I am--
shovel sways from root
I lay next to soil,
cradle grit and bruised apple
I am inner core,
mantle, lithosphere
the cliche words "I miss you"
orbiting around the sun
All different earths of myself
I hope when it rains
you don't find shelter
that your arms are the roof
I have waited my whole life

We force ourselves to stand
Three feet apart
hips hug both sides of my stove
This is the only way we can exchange words
without clutching jaw
and drinking down
the longing on our tongues
without inhaling goose bumps
and locking fingers,
palms and tips--
our roots
twisting around an angular world
Our words might as well be our pores
touching and igniting into the night
They dance around our mouths and
tug at our stories
It is our pause that holds me,
Where silence steps in like a sister
Nodding and approving
of the way
we look at each other
like a night sky
bursting with bright
You are my light.

I will
go
ahead and
break my own heart
thank.you.very.much

Hand me clamp
Your clenched jaw
Waiting to chomp at the bit

You grip my hand,
introduce yourself
My aorta crushes your knuckles
Oh you can't let go?
What a shame
Beat you to it.
Broke rib cage
Crunched down on
beating
Crimson

All before you could tell me where you came from

Hell.