She should not be left alone.
starfish will form from her shoulders
Extremities become tentacles
each breath sprays an ink of green passion
her iris's become piranhas
her heart--a sea-like Venus flytrap
solitude will transform soul
and vertebrae is coral cuffed
her siren lips sync to fatale vocal chords
and you, poor sailor are brave enough to return
entranced, you can't help but look at what has become
of your love
Your remains
are gold skulls in sunken ships.

I will not be punished for what I feel
I will not let the anti-vagabonds knit together the
unsanctioned holes in my chest
Color will dagger
prisms will blind between ribs
And every day that I trudge through blank stares
and twin smiles
my hair will tangle and the moons of grit will sleep soundly
in nail beds
I'll keep chewing on words that free themselves around soul connections
Never swallowing them down
in fear that I'll be stuffed on my own metaphors
instead of the gorgeous others that await my digestion
of their seizured energy
I find myself, a rookie artist
thumbed down by grey roles
that fit me like a bustier made of hornets

It didn't happen all at once
But it was an immediate awareness
A feeling rather
Is it an ending of something?
Or a beginning?
Or the sudden drop of the ******
Within my story
Just trembling and ready to head uphill again
Because my novel knows me too well
And so do the stars
A pro climactic rising
Is always around the corner
No it was more like an opening and closing
Or a cutting off of rotted midnight limb
And in its place a blossoming rainforest full of the woodland emotions that look a lot like
Furry clashing forces
I'm not quite sure how to describe it but
All I know is that I rescued myself
From me
And here I am
A floating thriving body on glass water
An ebb that quenches my pores Tiger fish that offer their scales for comfort
And algae that looks a little like sparkly mold from the moon
And the air I breath as I float is crystalline
salty renewal
And that saltwater taffy smirk of mine
Is real
Chew it between perspectives
The diamonds in my eyes
Have been authenticated
Go ahead and sell them at full price

I was built from my fathers tiny bones
my umbilical cord circled with second hand rage.
I entered oxygen
with Raggedy Anne eyes
black circles of fear under stitched innocence
Paired with
my inside out jumpers on picture day
And the quivering hands of my mother
smoothing my tangled curls
I ended up being jumpy just like her
And I got your thick hairline and your breathless passion for music and your ****** up need to explore the darkest cracks of humanity and your avoidance of mortality and your charming sexuality to get exactly whom you wanted--an elite lover who deserves better just to have them in sticky gripped destruction and I got your restlessness and your love for the forbidden and your salvation in rain
and your destructive awful enchanting chaos

A young girl sat across from me and asked me what she should do about her father
and there I was with my dynamic response
she weeped
she needed someone to be without poetic movement and body language
Without vigor
She said it reminded her of her violent father
My mother giggles at how distorted I entered the
world
Dislocated nose
A cone head
and misshaped eyes
Didn't she realize my world was distorted before I even got there?
I have always been pretty good with empathy.

Although you attempt to jab me
In passive backless form through
Exclusion and cruel bliss
I must remember...
this is all yours
Your ****, your insecurity, and your madness
It's your toxicity to wade through
Your shins laddened with black tar
Your words laced in spite
Your pulse can have a rhythm of vengeance
But I, I will stand firm and know
This is not mine to absorb
I zip myself up in thick skin
And know
I am confident and lovely and hilarious
I am beautiful and adventurous and stimulating
I am intelligent and courageous and healing
and I don't have to succumb to your demented seventeen year old white girl bully *******.

I want to eat up fir trees
and your eyelids
and cupcakes full of doubt
I want to sip up sweaty windowsills
and your vowels
and goblets full of desire

Is it too late to shrink into violets at full bloom
Too early to squeeze into the round sleeves of the moon
Too inconvenient to consider the hobbling leg of a ****** love ?
Has my moment passed
to lick up the freckles that fall
From face to floor
Am I too young to slip my words into a box of dogma?
Too old to melt into serpents
And I'm sure you'll tell me
I'm too pretty to dry up in a wasteland of apathy
and too confident to dive into gaped alligator comfort
Too lost to soak in road map paper cut blood
And my brain is far too twisted to
wrap around your body
buckling and cinching
as armor
Of course my flesh is too toady
For your winter coat
I've been told
It's much too prosaic to embarrass the rising rays
with my black aggressive grip
I will reach out anyways and harbor away yellow
Every second I can.
That, that you cannot take away from the pockets of my soul