I swear I have so much to say.
But all I can give you is silence.
There's not enough words to explain.
And I feel so guilty when I shouldn't be.

A new name for a new person.

-

right and easy have never been the same thing.

It's been a year
since I saw you
die

since I slept rest-
lessly, my forehead pressed
against your
hospital bed

Night after night
your struggling
breath and
the beep beep beep of
your monitors

It's been a year spent
licking my wounds
in hopes that they
would heal,
like people say that
time will do

It's been a year
since I saw you
die
and, my
love,

I still can't
live without
you.