Usually takes me all my life to get a couple words out of me
but today it's like I have been awaken from a long sleep
Ready to express everything inside of me
Let every word be written down
May you say my poetry out loud
let nothing hold me back now
Like emotions are throwing up out of my mouth
Such a weird way to put it
But I'm saying it
In the unique way it comes out
I won't stop
Makes me feel alive
To let it all out

It's a place where no one knows
A place where I miss my parents
And pretend that it doesn't **** me not to have them around
And wish my soul could rest where they are now
A search for who iam
Lost and confused
Blinded on where should I go now
Pushing away from everyone
Hating to be surrounded
And told what to do
Depressed and self pity has a place in my darkness
Joy in my sleep
Because no one can bother me
nor stress me out
Though happy does not exist in this darkness
Overeating and talking down to myself before anyone could put me down
A INSECURE CHILD TRYING TO GROW UP AND ACT HER AGE
Too old to be playing around.
BUT I Hide myself in my shame
Try hard not to lie to those who love me
Guess I get Ashamed of the truth I get myself in
No one would approve so my negative thoughts tell me now

Why do I stop writing when I know I'm going mantally insane
Not saying what I want to say
Dealing with life everyday
If you haven't figure it out now
I'm venting my feelings
In the only way I know how
My poetry is my therapist
And my words and thoughts are
The things that calm me down
Because I'm bossed around on the daily
And expected to do the unexpected
Feeling so stretched thin
Can almost scream
because the stress it brings

You make me smile
Check mark the box next to Good
Your not the 6foot tall dark and handsome i had longed dreamed about
somewhere imbetween checked good and bad
I look at this list I've made of you and there is only three things that draw to the negative
And the good outweighs it all
so maybe it time for me to stop trippin
Except the love I have been given
NOt used to being loved in such away
By a stranger who wanted know me in every way
And me fighting every step of the way
Been hurt so long
by too many nameless people
who are just face
and a memory now
Hard to accept anything good
when it's Givin
You almost don't know how to react
Gotta let yourself be happy
And let the good things play out

My stress is high
Easily influenced by my anger
Trying to breath
and remember it could be worst
Count my blessings
One-Im alive
Two-all that I have asked for has become mine
Three-i have a loving family that I would be lost without
That should be enough to relieve my stress remember what I have
and be grateful for it

I have been in and out of relationships swearing off men for life
and trying to remind myself
Don't rush
Try to improve yourself
before involving anybody else
I'm getting older
Sometimes I think I should be married by now
and each time my heart gets harder and harder to turn anyone away
Because worried of missing my chance of a life time
No faith
No place
Don't know how
but I wanna smack myself
When mister brandnew
Becomes my true love overnight
Never patient
Always opposite of what I should be
Don't wanna be single for the rest of my life
but I don't wanna be a relationship right now
Yet Caught in another predicament

I have been in and out of relationships swearing off men for life
and trying to remind myself not to do that again
Don't rush
Try to improve myself
before involving anybody else in my life
and each time my heart gets harder and harder to turn anyone away
but I always wanna smack my forehead like....Here I Go Again
When mister prince charming
Becomes my true love for now
But really got too much going on that I barely even have time for myself