As I watch Autumn glide into Winter,
Sparse are the fond memories I invoke,
Just a fragment here, and there a splinter,
But Love left not one ember to stoke

Hopes and dreams that held promises of Love
Hang like withered fruits upon the vine;
And my heart, like the solitary dove,
Mourns for the love that never was mine

As the hourglass marks the eleventh hour
I watch anxiously as the sand falls;
Loneliness wields its consummate power
While Death impatiently walks the halls

Is there time to right this egregious wrong ---
Will Fate discipline its heart of stone?
Before the last refrains of my swan song
Might I yet ascend Love's golden throne?

Only Fate foreknows all that's yet to be,
But it has no voice with which to speak;
Silently it walks toward eternity
Veiling the havoc it may yet wreak

If only to alter Fate's fickle mind
And beg Time to walk a slower pace,
The days yet to come might be redesigned
To show me a more merciful face

And each path I take might be strewn with flowers,
When I bet on Love, I just might win .......
Ah, what futile dreams fill these lonely hours,
Trying to calm the churning hell within!

I watched love take wing, swooping in constant flight,
Seeking a heart upon which it could alight

I watched Love clamoring for recognition,
Begging to be claimed without inhibition

I watched Love floundering in desperation,
Wearied of its flight with no destination

I watched Love grow weaker with each passing day,
Pleading for sustenance to keep death at bay

I watched Love yield to its frail mortality,
Defeated by the truth of reality

I watched Love succumb, forlorn and rejected,
Now it's dead ..... never to be resurrected

I'm needing Love like the rose, needing rain,
With bowed head awaits dawn's dewy cloud;
Her frail petals wither in distress
Beneath deprivation's brutal shroud;
So Love denies me its sacred balm,
Thrusting me among the loveless crowd

I'm needing Love like the stars need the sky
To recline in its endless caress;
So my lonely heart seeks a domain
Where sadness and pain dare not transgress --
A sanctuary where I'm absolved
From the tyranny of loneliness!

I'm needing Love like the birds need their wings
To worship from a loftier perch
Their God, who tends to their every need,
Yet, how vain and futile's been my search!
All my pleas for Love have gone unheard,
Doomed to die in a vacuous church

I'm needing Love just as Nature needs Spring
To rub Winter's long sleep from her eyes;
Please tell me that Love is sleeping, too,
And from its slumber it soon shall rise;
Tell me Love will come and carry me
Through the golden gates of Paradise;
Tell me! and then wait for the heavens
To resonate with my joyful cries!

Blithe and carefree as a wandering cloud
He drifted one day into my life;
How sweet were the hours Heaven allowed,
Tranquil - even though misery was rife

At times I'd been blinded by the sun,
But in his shade the path became clear,
No regrets appeared when day was done,
Joy, even hope, dared to draw near

Life is such a melancholy thing
When the heart is denied what it craves;
Now at Love's throne I was worshiping,
Dead dreams resurrected from their graves!

Like dormant seeds in a Springtime rain
My heart was awakened from its sleep
To welcome Love to its new domain.
(No longer would Heaven watch me weep)

But Heaven scoffed at my happiness!
Once again, Fate bared its ugly streak;
A brewing storm foretold my distress,
And in an instant my world turned bleak

Restless gusts were rehearsing their flights,
Like fierce gales that form upon the sea,
And as clouds often do on starless nights,
True to the wind, he drifted far from me

On this grave don't lay your spray of flowers
As tearful mourners bid me adieu;
I'll not be moved by their sweet perfume,
Nor be dazzled by their brilliant hue;
Your past deeds defined my curtain call --
Deeds that bear the bitter taste of gall

Please, let there be no sorrowful tears,
Don't pretend to lament my demise;
Remain unmoved as you were in life
When you saw tears flowing from my eyes;
Show no sorrow, not even a bit,
Lest you be branded a hypocrite

Come not to the mound where I've been laid
While uttering some meaningless prayers,
Once Death announces the end of day,
For broken hearts there are no repairs;
Don't seek forgiveness while on one knee --
I'll be slumbering in tranquility

As I drink from the Eternal Fount,
Do not sully the Waters of Peace,
Keep your distance, this soul is at rest,
At my grave is where your torments cease!
To the Light I will have made my way
As shreds of a wretched life decay

Imprisoned in my melancholy world
I sought escape in my errant dreams;
A vast universe of promise unfurled --
A stroll with love through Elysian streams

As my eyelids closed, my awakening came --
A dream lover woke my dormant heart;
A small spark kindled into a bright flame
Commanding the darkness to depart

And I savored love in all its splendor,
Every trace of loneliness had flown;
How swift and complete was my surrender,
For love's divine hand now held my own

But desperate hearts see what's not really there --
Phantoms and imaginings so real
That for brief moments they numb our despair,
And wounds of loneliness start to heal

How frail are the dreams of the desperate heart,
Fashioned of cloud-drifts and withered leaves;
With the slightest breeze they scatter apart,
(In dismay the bewildered heart grieves)

Doomed is love conceived of the lonely heart,
It's destined to end in tears and pain;
That darkened veil that sleep had torn apart
Now envelops my heart once again

In dreams, reality wears a disguise --
The love I find there is mine to keep;
So come, dream lover, murmur your sweet lies,
As the night winds lull me back to sleep

My languid heart was lost in reverie
As I wished upon a star last night;
While engaged in this wistful beggary,
An angel altered my wretched plight

The mirror briefly captured his contour,
My silken sheets wrinkled with his weight,
His wings, with subtle fragrance of mille fleur
Brushed my face in a most awkward state

My body quivered as I gasped aloud,
(His intentions could only be guessed)
O'er my room the moon spread its silver shroud
As warm lips against mine gently pressed

What sensual words were whispered in my ear,
(I'm sure Seraphs blushed in disbelief!)
Rarely are mortals permitted so near
Heaven, discarding Life's cloak of grief

Yet, is this not deemed a celestial task?
Love must soar on wings of Faith and Hope
Guided by an angel in mortal mask,
When in our dark solitude we *****

In his arms I had found my paradise!
Though this encounter was but a dream,
How deep was the love I saw in his eyes,
When he touched me how real it did seem

Panic seized my heart as morning appeared
And the sun's first rays dappled the floor;
With dawn's light he vanished, just as I feared,
For even Heaven could give no more

But on my mind is etched every detail,
And when yearning makes my thoughts take flight,
Should I make a wish and the stars fail,
I've but to recall that wondrous night