When I think of days and nights I have spent
Begging unresponsive deities,
I now wonder if that time should have been used
Savoring life's wine, instead of on my knees

So many prayers that rose like curling smoke
From a heap of dried smoldering leaves,
Rising upward, supplicating a response,
Were they lost in some galaxy thick with thieves?

I fear not one reached its destination --
Am I naive in my conclusion
That perhaps my prayers were feckless and garbled,
Or dismissed in a moment of confusion?

No! My prayers were delivered distinctly,
But to each one futile hope was pinned;
Too often these hands folded reverently,
While my supplications were lost to the wind

Now the rivulets are too cold to flow,
And the trees have donned their robes of ice;
No longer will these hands be joined together
Pointing upward, trying to reach Paradise

Such things are not accomplished by begging,
I turn my back and scoff at the rules
Of a game won only by the most cunning,
While faithfully observed by cowards and fools

I will not survey the devastation
Strewn in paths I've so faithfully trod,
Walking on thorns, wondering if I've suffered
Long enough to be found worthy by some god

Misery and woe have trespassed my heart,
So here's a vow I will not rescind:
These hands will now be used to reach out for love,
And not for prayers that will be lost to the wind!

Pondering the gnarled vineyards of twilight,
It is for these grapes that I hunger,
For they have survived the drought and the blight,
Bearing scars of days when they were younger

The fruits of old love are tender and sweet,
For they've learned to endure sun and shade;
Keeping strong through gale force winds, snow and sleet,
Their true value has been measured and weighed

Old love seeks beauty deep within the heart,
The wrinkled face and the graying hair
Matter not, yet what a sting they impart
To the lonely tangled in Time's cruel snare

Observe the pearl fishers - they're not concerned
With the oyster's shell, but with the prize
That's dwelling deep inside, for they have learned
They might find a gem in cunning disguise

Satisfying are the fruits of old love,
So patiently they wait to be claimed
By soft, wizened hands, gentle as a dove,
Yet displaying passion's touch, unashamed

Love that has withstood the test of the years
Is a love that's worth its weight in gold;
In spite of all the sorrows and the tears,
Old love can still bear fruit a hundredfold

How blessed are we who can see love's sweet truth
Unfolding before our very eyes;
We don't need the exuberance of youth
To yield to love's call  under star-filled skies!

Old love has had its feet held to the fire,
And it emerged, still able to stand;
It survived the bogs of life's muck and mire,
What more can be said ..... for sure, old love's grand!

No one lives in this house anymore,
Long vacant, it fell into decay;
Once occupied by two loving hearts,
Now distant,  each gone its own way

Shall I tell you of the blissful nights
And days rich with joyous harmony??
If a tear or two runs down your cheek,
Feel no shame, weep along with me

I scarce can speak of things I have seen
Without tears welling in my eyes,
But was this not easy to predict,
Walking through the ruins of Paradise?

Try to imagine love's warming light
Spilling forth from each window pane;
Never mind the snow upon the sill,
Nor the gales that foretold pounding rain

This house had withstood many a storm,
This fortress with its stanchions of love;
Who knew that Fate would come blast the ledge,
Tumbling  it from its base with one shove!

Come, let's walk the garden one last time,
Does the silence not cause you to grieve?
The birds have left, not a flower blooms . . .
Perhaps it's best that we, too, should leave

I blow the coals, but they will not blaze,
Cold ashes upon a dead hearth lay
(How futile is the battle we wage
Against Fate, for it will have its way)

No one lives in this house anymore,
The window panes are cracked and broken;
The orchard is overrun with rot,
Love's final words have been spoken

My days are tormented by longing,
So many dreams life did not fulfill,
Longing for the love that never came,
(Yet the gallant heart is hopeful still)

I'm longing to foresee the future -
Just how long will my loneliness last?
Old memories offer no comfort,
So I'm longing to forget the past

I'm longing to know if God exists,
In my mind it still remains unclear;
Who shall I praise for nature's beauty,
Witnessing its wrath, whom shall I fear?

Few praise God in all circumstances,
The faithful pay homage without doubt;
But I'm perplexed by the suffering
Born of disease, war, famine and drought

I'm torn between loving and hating
A God who cannot seem to decide
If wrath or mercy is deserving ....
So both arrive, with hope on the side

I'm weary of this life of longing,
I seek my refuge in solitude;
Abandoning unanswered questions,
I ascend to spheres of quietude

But end of day finds my heart longing
That just one of life's schemes be revealed:
Fearing the reply, still it inquires:
Will love be mine? Or has my fate been sealed!

Once again my thoughts walk love's graveyard,
(Why is there no lock on that gate?)
Never have I seen a field so charred
By ashes of love that turned to hate

These remains of love provoke and rile
Stifled sobs as I look around
In silence, not wanting to defile
Sacred memories of this hallowed ground

Pain and pity are shaking my frame
As the tears gather in my throat;
False hope, and then prayer (one and the same)
Rise from my lips to some realm remote

Once again the heart is left weary,
Weak grows the pulse coursing my veins,
Gazing through eyes clouded and teary,
One last time I search through love's remains

But I can find nothing worth saving
Of a love that died long ago;
So why this unrelenting craving,
Why does this stream of memories flow?

It's over, I must put it to rest!
The bloom's faded, the fragrance lost;
Love's phantom now an unwelcome guest -
Worthless as a crucifix uncrossed

See those stars twinkling so high in the skies?
Some are sad stars trying to avert their eyes,
They've observed lovers who have parted ways,
To keep from crying, they must turn their gaze

And those stars displaying faint hues of red .....
Don't know if it's true, but I've heard it said
Love songs and poems tend to make them cry,
And cause these soulful stars to blush and sigh

Now each star's assigned a task to perform,
To create galaxies, many must swarm;
Stars must grant favors when they're wished upon,
Should they fail their tasks, their light soon grows wan

And such stars will be expelled from their berth,
The Lord God sends them careening toward Earth;
It's not clear what offense they've committed,
Perhaps they were lax, or just dimwitted

But how lucky is the star that hovers
And twinkles in the bright eyes of lovers!
Their satisfying task never grows old,
(With stars in our eyes, love never grows cold)

If love has found you, then you have been blessed.
If you're still searching, don't give up the quest;
And when love tears down despair's prison bars,
Don't forget to thank your lucky stars!

What was it that made me so bitter
Toward life and my very existence?
Might it be all those unanswered prayers
And God's unrelenting resistance?

What was it that caused this discontent --
A bountiful harvest, just wasted?
The grove that flowered, then went to seed,
Leaving the fruits of love untasted?

What made me choose to live in darkness
Rather than rekindle the spent flame?
Did I tire of seeing Love's light expire --
Just new photos in the same old frame?

What caused me to flee from Love's garden --
Was it Truth's orchard, beset with rot?
Or was it the daisy petals I plucked
That all ended with "He loves me not?"

What led me to finally realize
Nothing is what it appears to be?
Was it that vow of eternal love
That dissolved like foam upon the sea?

I've since learned to quell my eagerness
When Hope beckons with its radiant light;
I've abandoned foolish hopes and dreams
Knowing now that Fate decides our plight