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 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
Driven Insane
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
Maybe it's the music I listen to
Or maybe it's the weather
But one thing that I know for sure
Is that is isn't getting any better

Maybe it's the way we parted
I chased a shadow and you ran like hell
But one thing that I know for sure
Is that I am not feeling well

Maybe it's the fight I had
My best friend's silent resentment, driven insane
But thing I know for sure
Is that this is much more than pain
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
I break for her brokenness
I ache for her soul
She is blind to this fallen world
She is numb to the cold

I weep for her openly
I will see her again
A few more days, to numb the pain
And I will see my friend
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
Seattle
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
As we got closer to Seattle
The fog cleared my eyes
The lights eased the pounding in my head
And the scent of her coffee
Filled my nose
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
Musicians
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
It was a highway that brought me here
Stuffed into a expensive car with four adults and good music
We drove for what seemed hours
Arriving on the slick, black streets of the Emerald City
Down a rabbit hole of old cars and termite ridden stairs
Past an old couch and a stray cat
Into a cold room with heaters stacked and jumbled
Full of pianos and good and beer
People I've known for twelve years
And people I've met only once
People I don't know
Different skins, of their own, of animals
Frizzy and cropped hair, wine and mason jar glasses
Walls painted silver, gleaming under forty year old lamps
Mismatched furniture and occupants alike
Sirens singing in the background
Children running through the foreground
Old friends and a blind man with a big dog
Visual artists and IRS agents
Musicians and carpenters
Mechanical engineers
Cobbled together around and old fireplace and a rosewood piano
Sharing stories and songs, sons and daughters
Tales from the road, and wedding pictures
I sat on an orange pleather couch in the makeshift kitchen
Watching theses people's children play with bionicles and dolls
Reading books and drawing on walls
Playing drums and answering calls
Fighting for bathroom stall
These are my people
I know them all
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
LOVE
 Jan 2013 loric
Robyn
LOVE DOES NOT BREAK YOU
IT IS NOT CRUEL
YET YOU STILL LOVE HIM
YOU CALL THIS LOVE
AND REFUSE TO TRUST THIS RULE
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
Stretched to breaking
Ancestor's gap
Pride swelling, creaking strain...
With pride.
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
A canyon-wide bond, not deep, still strong
Memories numb, dusty and old emerge from the dark, drive back the cold...
...Of years apart.
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
Only
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
Playground bully, thick lipped and ruddy he stalks through my world.
Dreams and plans scatter before him, scurrying away like a flock of birds.

"it’s only pain.”, I hear a voice from somewhere behind me say.

When will I stand up to him? See beyond his beady, un-blinking eyes into the empty fear that drives him, that makes him weak?

Fear is our common enemy.  It drives his fists into my mouth, and it drives the blood from my heart...poor, lost heart.

"it’s only pain.”, I hear a voice from somewhere behind me say.

Yes.
It is.
It is the outcome. It is not the creator.
It is a verb, not a noun.

Bully. *******.

*****-fear.

I'm done with you.
*It was a simple thought with far reaching implications. What if..what IF...I relegated pain (pain of all kinds, physical, emotional, spiritual) to a place of relative insignificance? What if it held little sway over my decision making? I mean, what IS the power of pain over us? WHY does an unpleasant sensation seem to trump all other motivations and hi-jack our lives..our identities? Certainly pain can alter our pace, even cause us to modify our path to some extent, but why does it so frequently alter our destination? What would happen if I simply refused to surrender these most important things to pain?*
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
The trees reach up too high today,

they tear at the hem of a cloud


A bridal train in tatters

ribbons of a heavenly shroud.


The waves reach not so high today

as to cover up the shore


They leave me room for walking

and I find I’m wanting more...


...more space more room more mind more prayer,

more heart more soul more vision


A growing space inside of me

crying out for a decision



Today I feel the emptiness

where once he stood with me


The Stone whose name is Weariness

forever there will be.



I found it today; the Stone called Weary;

nestled as it was in the sand.


I wept as I carried it, this Stone called Weary;

it marks where I used to stand.
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
Cloud
 Jan 2013 loric
GeordieTheMonk
Approval hangs over my head like a giant black cloud.

It’s always there…always promising a down pour, but only delivering earth shaking thunder….
....lightning that suddenly flashes out of the heavy darkness and strikes the ground of my life,
rupturing my ear drums, causing me to cower with my head between my legs, eyes clinched, crying as loud as I can in a vain effort to drown out the overwhelming noise.

That’s not all…it starts fires too.  

A dry cloud.

If I manage to gain enough courage to move from my hiding place, I can scramble to maybe two or three of the small but growing fires that were recently started. I frantically dance upon these little fires, spitting out angry curses like my mouth is full of sand, and crying at the same time…

...desperate to put the fires out, wishing my tears of frustration were so voluminous as to drench them altogether but they just fall from my cheeks as I madly stomp and spin…hissing as they evaporate…useless in the growing flames.


There are the occasional victories.

A fire, that after great effort, is finally extinguished.

As I pause, panting and smiling for just that instant, I become aware of how much I stink of soot and sweat and dirt, and my eyes take in all the smoldering hot spots. Dozens…hundreds. The fires still burning just beneath the surface of the dry needles and twigs.

They’re everywhere.

Thunder rolls again and I look up, desperate for rain.
June 2005
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