"Be strong", cry out the tough at heart.
Feel not that inward pain.
Let hurt emotions linger not,
only protective minds are sane.

Look not into her face of hurt
for you may feel it, too
It's hard enough to brave her shield
let alone, keep covered, you.

When inhibited to deeply feel,
incidence of pain abound.
The hearts skips the intensity
so unique, when love is found.

When sensitivity is surrendered
true emotions cannot surround.
The beauty of eternity then chimes
without a sound.

There are certain times in life
and hurtful situations,
that harden hearts; diminish hope;
create self-condemnation.

Obscured by images unkind
and relationships impure,
my spirit fell to depths unknown:
troubled, sad, in fear.

As I watched the flame of my heart diffuse
and avert to a darkened hue,
God whispered softly to my soul
and then He gave me you.

Once again I know I'm special,
deserving of such grace
I'm reminded of His special gift...

each time I see your face.

If you came to know me with eyes blind,
If your soul touched just my heart and mind,
If I had no arms; could not embrace
If it hard to look upon my face
If fancy things I had not such
If they laughed and sneered about me much
If I needed help to face the pain
If I fought to win, but all in vain
If scared, I watched the world pass by
If I cried and you did not know why

If despite these things I write above,
you held me close...

I'd have known Love.

Traveling on an unknown road
I saw just in the distance,
a private piece of naked soil,
so I planted with persistence.

From seedlings sprouted tiny plants
so anxious for the sun.

They were perfect, pure, empyrean;
a blessing, every one.

These plants were truly nature's gift
where beauty blooms and spirits lift.

Flowers dancing in each space,
buds of pearl and vines of lace.

The soft breeze whispers to your spirit,
Tender hearts and children hear it.

The songbird flutters,
a dewdrop beads;
and just above the gate it reads:

"Plant your love in the hearts of all -
Effort justifies a stumble, and saves a fall.
The wealth of love is yours to know
but if not planted, does not grow."

No strength had it bestowed me,
repeatedly I had been distraught.
That mighty, evil force within;
my love and innocence it sought.

With cunning ease it weakened me,
chipped at my faithful soul.
Like a quiet thief that struck at night,
it stole my treasures.
How could I have known?

He must have chuckled quietly,
as he packed my self-esteem.
Perhaps, I heard his cry of joy
when I was bitter, hateful; mean.

With expertise he found my honored trust
and he quickly took that, too.
Oh, dear Lord, was that your tears of rain
when he crushed my faith in You?

My precious God,
I took your love for granted.
Rebelliously, gave in to sin.
Just when I heard your soothing voice,
he kicked me down again.

Now, beaten, battered, torn, and lost
the narrowed road seems long.
My weakened spirit doubts
I'm worth the effort to go on.

Yet, just when all alone I feel.
I turn around to find
an angel to battle my demons,
just in the nick-of-time.

His golden wings protect me.
His body shields me from the harm.
His loving voice does soothe me.
I find my strength within his charm.

Now, hope portrays new meaning.
For me, I know he's meant.
A gift from clouds where Angel's dance,
My Jeff is Heaven-sent.

I'd given on up second chances.
I'd given up on dreams come true.
Thank you Lord for having other plans for me.
Thanks for sending Jeff to help me through.

In a conscious dream I saw him.
Naked was his soul.
He wrapped me in his tenderness,
let down his self-control.

He caressed me with his energy.
He engaged me with his charm.
In his presence, I was free from pain;
safe from any harm.

Like flames he fast consumed me.
Weakened was my frame.
Our spirits soared together.
Life could never be the same.

His heart has opened many doors.
The experience surreal.
His thoughts are now inside me.
He is everything I feel.

I kiss him sweetly, gently.
With tenderness I cry.
"Thank you, God for blessing me
with Jeff before I die."

Not strong enough to free myself,
my kindred held the key;
unlocking all true joys in life,
I gently, worshiped thee.

Through his eyes I watched us dance with love
and laugh with utmost glee.
With his faith I saw perfection,
as I viewed all that was "us",
as I rejoiced in "we".

With his gentleness he loved me pure,
an angel I could be.
A flower sure to bloom someday,
he was the sun that nourished me.

With utmost honesty, my soul I shared
unveiling more than he should see.
I then watched his disappointed eyes.
I lost him.
Silly me.

In pain, I hate myself once more.
Alone again; most naturally.