We told each other lies we said we would never fall for.
Guess I don’t know you all that well, anyway.

Guess it doesn’t matter that every time the lights go off my
Hands are on your face and you,
You also have hands.

I will try to stop telling you how silly all these girls are.
I had meant to stop catching your eyes,
Catching my eyes out of corners when we both should be focused on other things.

I tried to sleep and dreamt you had left in the night.

I tried to sleep, alone and aware of you alone in the night.

You are the triangle in my Pythagorean Theorem.

Circles may be never-ending,
but I would rather be quite clear on our angles and
all that other nonsense.

I'd rather be equivalent or at the very least,
equidistant.

You say there is something great about rocketships and
The lack of oxygen or gravity, I mean
Who needs firmly planted feet or
Even to breath when there are still Saturdays and rain clouds?
I would make you triangles you could fill you house with only
I’d like it to be my house too.
Not now, just, with a dog and a yard.

I am drawing you a sonnet but it is in crayon
And I don’t know if you will like it at all.
Not as much as a Monet, or a Klee, but it
Still had rainbow colors and it is abstract and
Beautiful maybe.
It will lead you to that place (sonnets and maps are what we make)
You know
Where we will grow up in a few years.

1.
i am afraid of men touching my wrists
Now.

i listened to myself lie to my mother about where these bruises came from.
She shook her head and told me to be careful,
This world is not made for girls who want to keep up with the boys.

This world is not made for girls,
He says,
Who don't sleep over. This world is not made for girls who don't
Ever listen.

i kept my nose intact with one hand while the other held his face and i knew i didn't belong here.
i broke knuckles on the doorframe.

2.
i just wanted to be honest with the man i danced with.
It's not you, it's always me.

We were drunk, and stupid, and scared.

I was scared.
You were all poise with your surgeon hands
To cut past the layers of clothing and skin.
I clutched the air, like a sheet, to my chest.

You wanted an adventure but got me.

But we still reference The Office.
It makes us feel relevant, like we belong to an idea beyond ourselves.
Some 20-somethings’ movement where
We set today’s standards.

We sit and drink in the corner booth at the same bar.
We watch
Everyone else as they take pictures;
As they choose the next song on the jukebox.

I will kiss you again when you’re lipless.
I would love for you to follow me home
I will be your small bird if you let me,
Singing you softly but singing alone.
I can be the tune on your radio,
I don’t mind being the song in your head
And I will keep living this way if you let me
We made this bed,
I will be lying here, I will be bruised but maybe still
Soft on the inside.