Lily Pandera

Lily Pandera Aug 2011

"I've only got an hour."
she says.
Her eyes
bold and fast.
--abrupt in letting him know.
She wouldn't allow herself
to stay the night.
Not tonight.
She had to make
herself go.
"Okay." He said.
"If that's what you want."

She didn't respond;
kept her face still, hard and gaunt.

"Why did you come here?
You know an hour's not enough."

Again she said nothing,
and he drank his tea in disgust.
"I wanted to see you.
Had to see
How you've grown."

"What's there to see when
you know I'm alone."

The paper lanterns hanging moved ever so slightly
She reached out, touched his hand.
Their fingers kissed lightly.

Lily Pandera Aug 2011

inky pen

My pen is getting inky.
Leaving stains here and there.
Not yet on my page.
––only fingers.

Hello, little pen. Why
are you marking me?

"I want to add." it says,
"--to leave
myself on what I see.
Just shows you mean something to me."

"Oh." I reply. "Well I had
no idea. But what to tell others
when they see you on me?"

"What's to tell?"
My little pen laughed.
"I marked you like
I do a page.
Will you try to make it last?"
He thought.
"Either wash it off
or decide that it's fine.
I'll still remember
that I'm yours
and you're mine.
Others may wonder,
but what do you care?
Be happy you're a writer.
Get what you want out there."

Lily Pandera Aug 2011

I felt the buzz

I felt it buzz
between
my fingers.
Tiny vibrations.
Throughout me,
it lingers.
I wanted to befriend
––not to fear
the baby bumblebee.
But instead,
it buzzed.
And I panicked,
surprised it had scared me.

Lily Pandera Aug 2011

Things I'm Missin'.

I drink
by myself tonight.
Wish you were here.
Watching documentaries
Facts go through my ears.
Of big fish eating smaller ones
and things I've never seen.
Bright colors with translucency
and odd-looking things.
I want to tell you,
want to say...
But it takes more to text
so I go about my day.
A hilarious ballet
of eels before my eyes.
I laugh
and notice I'm alone
...not to my surprise.
I love to watch
and while I write
I sit absorbing and I listen.
Information pouring in
amazement at things I'm missin'.

Lily Pandera Aug 2011

Warm Day, Warm Water.

I swim.
Warm water.
Warm day.
I think of you.
I lift my head up
and my hair slicks back.
I smile widely
as a monarch crosses my path.

I think of you
when I look at the
trees.
See the shadows
and the sun
and the shrubbery underneath.
So beautiful,
for no one.
I hardly noticed
but now I see.
Highlighting and
contrasting
colors.
Shapes.
Smells?
It's all here. So I dry
and catch a picture
when show and tell
appears.

I think of you
when I untie my top...
I wonder if neighbors can see?
Still alone,
I don't stop.
Imagine you entreating me.
I laugh
I smile
and even when I get mad
or sad for a while
why is it
I keep thinking
of you?
Somehow,
of my senses,
your touch
flows through.
Anytime I'm without you
I feel the longing
for your hands.
And to tell you things
that excite me
because I want you
to understand.
I learn more; I want to share.
I hear something great; I want you
to care.
But what I want now
is just for you to be here.

Lily Pandera Jul 2011

Is this daunting?

Writing a poem now
seems a daunting task.
I used to write
every night
––multiples a week!
no one had to tell me,
ask,
no one had to seek.
What should I write about?
I'd just look around.
It'd come,
It'd flow
The words were happiest when found
––They'd tell me and I'd know.
But then, months later,
uninspired as I was,
Confused, upset
and just a little lost...
I looked back
and took a gander at my outlaid pride.
To my dismay, to my contempt,
my words were silly
and had no cause.
Upset upset
What am I writing for?
The talent I have
is in my head
and I need to be alone
once more.

Lily Pandera Oct 2010

A haiku, too.

I'm not afraid of
The dark when you're here with me.
But alone, light shows.

October 12, 2010