always been a perpetual dreamer
  castles forever floating in air
foundations constantly shifting below
  earthly tremors shaking the heavens
…a role reversal made to disorder

sometimes i long for a clear blue sky
  without puffy white towers soaring
ofttimes i wish for a darkened slumber
  with no white noise of fanciful fanfare
…a dreamer in reverie of dreamless nights

Enveloped in the sacred blue
your lyrically beckoning shores
an ancient anchoring to renew
safe harbor unknown before

Depths of clarity and calmness
in truth too deep to fathom
forever guarded by the goddess
sunken treasures not abandoned

This ship must cross the latitude
persistent winds setting sails
a changing in its attitude
soon homecoming prevails

sentimentally tattooed
permanently scarred
a colorfast spectrum

unrequited amnesia
autonomous dreams
bright grey dawns

perpetual emotion
forward momentum
one track bind

Increasingly distorted memories
   slowly succumbing to darkness
Some fallen, some forced into
   the oubliette of my subconscious

Figures of the past linger tentatively
   before receding into shadow
Familiar strangers they do seem
   as if merely remnants of dreams

The looking glass of childhood friends
   mirrors an unrecognizable effigy
An idealized reflection of a former self
   unflinching in its accusatory glare

Whispers persist from imprisoned depths
   for I am silently being recalled to life
Somehow I've forgotten how to be
   the only person I've ever wanted to be

Somehow I've forgotten how to be me

like a fish out of water
walking backwards upstream
grand illusion of compliance
buying nothing sight unseen

respecting their essence
detached from their path
connected in spirit
repelled by all wrath

norms without ethics
morality sans love
passion ever searching
a need to rise above

heart sinking hatred
mind numbing neglect
mountain moving greed
rarely circumspect

not infrequently i ponder
how my being was unfurled
wondering deeply in my soul
if i belong to another world

words deprived of meaning
  thoughts stranded in translation
   feelings imprisoned without sentencing

a stroke of life...un coup de vie
  an existence brutally stricken
   incapable of verbal expression

communication frustration...no relief
  nuances from mundane to sublime
   lost in an endless syntax maze

and sure, some actions speak louder
  but unspoken words of love and support
   fall like an acid rain of futility on the heart

Sad enough when inflicted by fate
  tragic as a self-induced metaphor
The muting of squandered opportunities
  will keep you disconnected and haunt your future

Aphasics have no say in this matter
            What's your excuse?

My heart yearns for what once was
   my mind fighting to hold the line in a quiet battle
  
Time, relentlessly persistent in its attempts to erase
   dragging my life forward into fading memory

Moments attenuating, absorbed by the past
   distorted in all but the essential
  
But their essence is distilled in my soul
   dormant in an archived strength and purity

Occasional mindbursts of beauty are released
   refusing to be contained or denied

A certain scent in the air, a certain quality of light
   a lyric of song, a touch of breeze...all catalysts

Spontaneously transported into a joyful state
   I'm consumed by a déjà vu of carefree ambiance

Bejeweled compartments spill their contents
   washing over my mind in a composite nostalgia

Familiar waves of concentrated being saturate
   my existence for a compelling glimpse of the idyllic

In those fleeting reveries of peaceful contentedness
   I feel completely at home within myself

towering and sheltering
shading and nourishing
a blossoming innocence
of suckled sweetness

draped in wand pods
sowing magical seeds
sprouting sapling bridges
between hoping and knowing

fluttering metamorphosis
butterflies of the night
seeking the light of home
dimmed within memory

though storms may wail
these roots run deep
though lightening strikes
these wings have spread

Inspiring is
  the perfection of her approaching form
By every measure
  the epitome of classic beauty

Beguiling is
  her countenance so fair
Thousands of ships
  launch in her wake

Captivating is
  the outline of her femininity
Every line and curve
  arousing in me unquenchable desires

Overwhelming is
  the appearance of one so lovely
My senses and spirit
  soar to her grace

For when my eyes behold her physical image
  it conveys to me the essence I recognize to be her

Beauty does not escape me
     I smell it; I breathe it in deeply
It sings to the essence of memory
     Reviving my soul

  wild summer grasses on warm, lazy air
  the trace of perfume in an empty elevator
  the earthy wood of a forest

I can only hope that beauty escapes me

awakening autumn air
absorbed with thrown caution
a penchant for yawning leaves
an affinity for desiccated hearts

stirring lakeside willows
whisking emotions away
wafting feminine fragrance
in walking women's wakes

moving to its own designs
gusting in pursuit of change
swirling clouds of romantic disarray
into dizzying vortexes of possibility

expanding the bellows of intimacy
lovesmith for glowing molten souls
passionately ignited, vulnerably cooled
forging bonds, tempering existence

they say a watched *** never boils
but my mind certainly does
and i watch it all the time
it's never out of my sight
yet it's constantly spilling its contents
in a roiled turmoil
all over my consciousness

the result is a reduction
of my state of mind
of my perspective
either a concentrated awareness
or a flavorless sludge of grey matter
it all depends on the heat applied
it all depends on evaporation

a proper chef would be attentive
a saucier of good stock
choosing quality ingredients
maintaining a simmer
avoiding a seethe
controlling condensation
distilling even pabulum to perfection

Homeless old beggar                                Elderly, destitute man in serious need
disgusting and annoying                          really down and out, desperate
degrades the neighborhood                     probably feels safe around here
aggressively accosts me                            approaches me hopefully
thinks I'm an easy touch                           believes he can count on me
unappreciative...always wants more       honest and humble about his needs
likely spends it on ***** and cigarettes  maybe I'll bring him food next time
Takes advantage of my good nature       Fortunate that I'm in a position to help

stellar direction in undulating terrain
punctuated by meteoric columns of infinite light
imparting a clutching embrace to the face of now

lunar reflections form a fluid nocturnal path
to an osculated gateway of fertile encompassment
culminating in breathless pillows of untabled silence

stars without fault grace the expressive heavens
while muted words gaze out through rooftop eyes
cascading over living stone in waterfalls of emotional geodes

chosen child for nature's creativity
tangoing to the sway of twilight trees
such spiritually sensual sensibilities

hypersensitivity heightening passion
life intensified in intellectual interest
love embellished with emotional empathy

oh, to bottle her elusive essence
to drink in her wistful nights
to infuse my tea with her promise
to scent my pillow with her dreams

uncork the atmospheric aroma
of sepia tinged crescents
wafting in celestial patisseries

sweeten the clear blue skies
with mists of crystallized honey
perfuming the divine aether

oh, fill my breath with her ephemeral
synchronize my life's pulse to the
metronome ponytails of skipping girls
followed by the tails of wagging dogs

I must know...

the smell of your blowing hair
   in the leaf-strewn autumn wind

the touch of your hand on my chest
   closely held in a sleepy winter bed

the sight of your eyes lit with wonder
   for the beauty of spring's first flowers

the sound of your voice calling my name
   through a window from a summer garden

...and as the cycle renews...

the taste of your fertility
   under the cover of a harvest moon

...there simply aren't enough seasons
to gain a complete sense of all that you are

ink of sky inhabits her eyes
  essence of serenity almondine
so spanish in silvern adornment
  though her soul is hafnium pierced

a haven for both life and death
  embodiment of artistic expression
openly hooded in earlobe spirituality
  nominally patrician by disposition

my source stirs in futile disarray
  kindred energy infusing the moment
a tree appears on a barren landscape
  devoid of foliage, vivaciously rooting

persistent as a ubiquitous urchin
charmingly offering promises
disguised as roses in her tiny hand

depriving as inanimate loveliness
pinned for posterity under glass
posing as a butterfly's fragile elegance

precious as tears welling involuntarily
in a singular moment of transient truth
when a beauty is fully comprehended

…such is the desperation of time

She will lose herself in a book
and find herself in poetry

She thinks that religion is a sacrilege
and that long showers are sacred

She makes love when she's tired
and never tires of making love

She is irreverent in her humor
and pious in her gravity

She is diligent in completing her work
and ambitious of her quest for leisure

She is the personification of romanticism
and the embodiment of compassion

She exists harmoniously in my mind

Time...a puzzle
   to realists and surrealists alike

Time...a puzzle
   of grand pieces
    obvious if obtuse
     obtrusive and obstructive
   laboriously laid to waste
    constructing a picture of existence
     solid yet stolid

Time...a puzzle
   of fine pieces
    subtle if sharp
     spacious and serene
   pensively placed at random
    culminating in a mosaic of life
      fragmented yet feeling

Time...a puzzle of pieces
   contained within a box
   ...or...
   in a different dimension altogether...

an infinity of predestined roles
an inclusive experience in totality
as every fiber, thread, and patch
in the quilt of being that is god

serial embodiment in all matter
animal, vegetable, and mineral
earth, atmosphere, and aether
purposeful suffering and solitude

new souls emerging from the cycle
comprehensive awareness fulfilled
a nebula of creative expansion
from a supernova of spirituality

novices grasping for comprehension
floundering with loving compassion
welling tears of confused recognition
from a source of obscured recollection

collective consciousness in transformation
the cumulative effect of genuine connection
to appreciate the strength of a star
to respect the divinity of a weakness

happiness arrives in a moment
and departs without a whisper
fleeting is constantly cyclic

blue sky hovers over teal sea
gold moonlight bathes pebbled shore
tide silently ebbs away froth

still i look to find a reason
for the disintegration of persistence
and the integral content of content

my visiting friend
  languidly lounging adjacently
    seemingly content with proximity

licking the hand momentarily
  suddenly biting somewhat tenderly
    but she remains, relaxed...

rooted in a summer beat
transcendent in a teal glow
music flowing to every chakra
seeking a level all her own

fueled by half moon and zydeco
senses ignite and expand
fulfilling the mystic spaces
with binding energy of dance

auspicious light yins to shadow
frosted hues of herbal mist
retreating to a café of secrets
revealing subtly just who she is

Finally...to have experienced genuine love!

...a captivating whisper of tender words
...a knowing glance of enduring confidence
...a gentle touch charged with intimacy

If only that lovely couple would pass by more often...