what’s going on
i sit here everyday
crying every day
listening to the same **** song
am i ok?
am i good enough?
my blank mind is no match for anyone
my thoughts are always rough
i feel dead already
i try so hard all the time
but what comes out of it
i hurt everybody
i feel dangerous
emotionally
i show the funny side
the kind side
but on the inside
i have no sides
what’s going on
i don’t deserve love do i
so many people say they love me
but my paranoia
makes my mind say they wanna hurt me
i always get called passive
they never see me cry
they say im mean
but on the inside i wanna die
he says all these things
gives me hope
but on the inside
i can’t cope
i love him so much
so i try
ill continue to try
but as of now
ive been wanting to die
what’s going on
i feel pathetic
he’s so ******* nice
seems like a dream
but what the hell
he doesn’t need me
i pull him down with all my issues
because of that i cry into tissues
what’s going on
i feel clueless
why are you depressed
why won’t he break up with you
it’s not like i have a list
i have no idea
the answers to some of my questions
but i wish my brain would stop hurting me
and learn some lessons
what’s going on
i wish i was better
that i didn’t think like this
but unfortunately
my thoughts aren’t something im gonna miss
i don’t know how to do this
how am i supposed to
when i don’t even know how to be a human
what’s going on

Am i dumb
I really thought this would go well
Of all my hope you destroyed every crumb
and somehow
I still feel bad
Like i did something wrong
Like i ****
Ever since that day i want to run
Run away from all the pain you caused me
For every emotion ive felt because of you
Because of you I am numb
I can’t believe i really believed you were different
I guess i really am dumb
I’ve waited days for you to show that you care
Even years
And within that
Every night i still shed tears

Shouldn’t this be different
Shouldn’t we be close
The idea of being related to you has honestly been gross

I guess that was the day
I couldn’t handle my pain
I shouldn’t have said anything
No I should’ve
The conflict in my brain
Really isn’t worth the pain

You know i really tried
I really did
But why am I the only one
It seems that from me you hid

But i feel so dumb
Because somehow
We can be related
But you’ve caused me pain
Of my hope
My happiness
My sense of being part of you
You’ve destroyed every crumb
And now i have to wonder if im dumb