I told you this would last forever
But I lied
I said things will never change
But I lied
I told you you were beatiful, even though I can't explain beauty
So I lied
I told you Red was a beatiful color
but who and what describes beauty?
For they say the beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder
I say it's mostly directly proportional to how you feel about a person
Excuse my mathematical jargon because I'm no Mathematician
Don't they say in the Bible that King Solom wore Purple, the color of beauty, the color of wisdom
But who am I to tell it different so, I lied
I said your skin was as smooth as silk and as beautiful as vanilla but, was it?  Was it really? I know I couldn't tell the truth so, I lied

I told you your eyes are beatiful, your eyes are big, twinkly
Maybe I lied, it was just your pupil dialating when it saw my light
I told you I could give you the world,
But the world was not mine to give to begin with, but baby its what you wanted so, I lied
I also told you the sky was green, the sea was blue, and you believed every word, I'm sorry

Maybe I lie a bit too much, or maybe just enough, or maybe that's also a lie
It's mostly to protect you

Remeber that day at the park?
I held you in my arms
The world didn't seeze to exist but us
We swore to be together for life, was it a lie
You said you're mine forever and I'm yours too, or was it also a lie?
Can't keep with the lies no more

It's lie after lie because that's all what you seem to believe
Because truth to you, seems too good to be true
I remember the day you held my hand, looked me in the eye and said, "do you still love me? "
I know I used to answer that everyday with no doubt in my mind, but that day,
The answer remained the same,
As I said proudly, "I still do babe"
Guess what?...

It's all said and done
You know you can't have your words back right
You can't unspeak them
You can't unthink them
You can't retrieve them from my ears
For they are words, the words you have said

Don't feel sorry for me now
No time for guilt now
What's has been done, has been done
You can't tumble and drown in guilt now
You can't go back
Wipe those tears now love, they mean less to nothing now

Life is not a Personal Computer my friend
There is no Cntr + Alt + Del,
Theres no undo, the Cntr + Z
Yes my friend, you did it
Yes buddy, you said it

Forget about the yesterday now,
You never getting it back
But you are here now
We, are here now
So what?

It did hurt like hell, Yes
Do i wish i handn't heard it nor saw it, Yes
Do i wish you'd turn back the hands of time, denitely Yes
Oh how i so wish I had Harry Porter's wand and Hocus Pokus myslef out of this
How I so wish I someone could erase my memories,
Or how I wish they can pinch me, wake me up, and say Baby, this was just a nightmare

Oh well, still doesnt change a thing,
Here we are, this very monent, this very time... So what now?

I know how old I am
I know how old I look
Don't be fooled by the beard on my face
Don't let my height fool you either
Just know, I am just a boy afterall

I love sports
I play with toys,
No, not the ones you have in mind
I play soccer once in a while
I might scream and shout at the TV knowing well Messi can't hear me
I still do it anyway
Because, I'm still just a boy

I have a drink with 'the boys' now and then
I act tough, I am tough
Also maybe a little soft inside
The side I never show
I hide my pain, I don't cry infront of people
Why? No, because I'm no *****
But, I am still a boy afterall

I like girls, only one I particular
She makes my heart skip a beat
I look at things I shouldn't sometimes
I make mistakes, nowhere near perfect
I lie sometimes, honest every other time
You know why,
because I'm just still a boy

And this very moment, this very place
I am just a boy, infront of a girl
Pouring his heart out
And asking her to love her...

Remember it like it was yesterday
Funny just how time pass us by
Some things we glad happened, some not
Words can never try to describe the feeling...Regrets, blames

Remember those long hours on the phone
Nothing else seemed not to matter but us
Maybe I wasn't thinking straight, maybe it was a dream..
But wait..I thought love does that to people
You just get lost into it..nothing but the two of you

Just remembering how it all began
Fairy tales couldn't justify it
Just one look, one word, one tear, one touch, just one smile changed it all
Changed the perspective of how the whole world was
Never have I set my eyes on something so perfect, something so heavenly made
It wasn't just love at first sight, it was every little prince and princesses dream

We were just perfect for each other..a match
We loved the same music, taste
My playlist took words right out of my mouth and spoke to you, and you understood
"Red pants,Blue shirt,great smile,great hair..and I with Red shirt,Blue pants,Red watch,Baseball jacket"..
Ooh yes..I still remember
And the cotton tree,,wow,how perfect
Just wonder where it all went wrong

I guess its true when they say, you never really know what you have until you lose it
See I tried my all to forget,,at least the brain did
But my heart could never forget

Things could be better, maybe not in this life but the other
Maybe I wouldn't hurt you then
Maybe you would forgive me
Maybe everything will change or maybe not...just maybe
Maybe in another life time...

I wonder I wonder I wonder
I wonder many things nowadays
I wonder if you miss me like I do
I wonder if you still care
I wonder if you ever think about me and just smile
I wonder if you share the same memories I have or was it just a dream I had alone
I wonder if you still blush when u hear my name or was it also just pretense
ι just ωση∂єя...

I wonder you still glow like I used to make you
I wonder if you ever think about what if things were different
I wonder if you ever regret the things we did
And I wonder if you are glad it happened
I just ωση∂єя...

I wonder if this was ever meant to be or if it was never
I wonder if this feeling is just temporary, just wonder if it will ever go away
I wonder if I'm the only one feeling this way
I wonder if yours hurts like mine does, or is it true when they say hearts don't break even
It got me ωση∂єяιηg...

I wonder if you still have that rose scent on your neck from your favorite perfume
I wonder if you still have twinkle in your eye
I wonder if your skin is still as soft silk
I wonder if your heartbeat still matches mine whenever you lay on my chest
I just ωση∂єя

I wonder if I ever had the choice to do anything different, would I have?
I wonder what if we met in a different place under different circumstances
I wonder then, would you still love me like you used to?
I wonder then, would you let me tell the whole world that I'm yours and you're mine?

ι ωση∂єя...ι נυѕт ωση∂єя...

Thoughts that manifest.. Multiply and breed fear..
Visions of the past, present and future merged into one.
This fear is well recognized but not well managed..
Seen a lot.. Been through a lot and will probably still do a lot..
I don't know much but for as long as I stay true to myself I will live by the words that say,
I don't wanna be that guy who uses girls because I can, or
I don't wanna be that guy who is used by girls because I have a car, a decent job
Don't wanna be that guy who ends up not growing up because I'll be busy chasing skirts
I don't wanna be that guy who ends up being alone, that guy who never really finds love again
I'm scared of being that guy.

I'm scared of karma
Scared I might enjoy
Scared I might get addicted
I'm scared of many things
Life also terrifies me sometimes
But I'm tired of being scared
Because all I wanna be..
I wanna be that guy my wife just lights up when she sees
That guy my son looks up to with pride and say, "that's my dad".
That type of guy I would want my daughter to get married to.
I wanna be that guy who has that family that works, and serves the house of The Lord.
I am that guy. I am me. And I am now not afraid.

He stands here a broken man
Shattered by his lies, deceptions, broken promises
He cheated, betrayed,
His head behind the shadows unable to reveal himself because he's ashamed
Ashamed of the man he has become
Ashamed of the little boy he has led astray
He should've been better
"I'm going to be as strong as an ox"
That's what he told his mom
He was going to be brave
He was gonna be a better man than his father ever was
He was going to get a princes, make her a queen and build her a castle with high walls and have little princes and princesses
This is how he was raised
He was raised by a queen after all
A strong woman who refused to fall
She built her own empire from the ground up alone, even daddy wasn't there
But that's how she wanted him to be, nothing like his father
He was supposed to be a protector
A man of God, a voice of wisdom
But it seems like all the wisdom he had fell on a piece of paper, but none in his head
Because if he did, he could've never had hurt her
Never lifted a finger towards her
Well, he didn't, what he did was far worse than a visible, physical pain, it was emotional
He knew it would break her, but did it anyway
You see a good boy as he thought he was, he did really found a princes
Fairest of them all, with skin as pure as silk, eyes with a glance of stars and the moon
Smile worth all of the gold in the land
And a heart of diamond
She was not only beautiful but strong, kind, loving, gentle and a beautiful heart
She reminded him a lot about his queen mother
So close to perfect she was, it was a dream
He remembered his mother's words
"Find yourself a princes boy. Introduce her to God. Treat her right, treat her like a queen. Always put her first. Respect her. Appreciate her. Value her. Stand by her. Do all this things and she will love you with all her heart. She will treat you like her king, and you will be role models to your children and they will also grow up as God fearing and full of love"
Yes, this he did, for a while at least; and he lost his way
He promised her the world
Such a sweet talker he was, he also believed himself
She was his, he was hers it was a fairy tale
All this and yet, he still hurt her
Queen mother would be ashamed
He knows his guilt, he realised his doing
Maybe a little too late
As she is shattered inside
It's impossible to put all the pieces back together now
Through all this hurt and pain, she still carries him in her spirit, in her heart
She is far better than pain,
Far better off without him, but she's still around
He knows she'll never be the same person again
She is changed
He doesn't deserve her, he never knew what he had
He's now very ashamed
He goes back behind his curtain
Afraid to show himself again
Because he's a broken man, and she is an irreplaceable diamond just reshaped
Demolished and more attractive and more expensive
Shattered no more, but a better heart