Relentless pounding
Ceaseless pressure
Crest deep heave shove
Collapse spread recede
Repeat
Gather grow peak collapse spread recede repeat
Constant irregular weighty dive
Tumble harshly continue fall

We smelled of the cheap heat
That blasted through the 1997 Volvo
To defrost our delusional minds
And our hands swept through
the passing wind
With elegance and vitality
Akin to living truly
And the music fluttered through air
And the lyrics came to rest
Settling like leaves in the end of autumn
On the grassy floor of our innocent minds

The air hums with static
Electric and sharp
Palpable in between our
Magnetic laughs

You are everything I crave  
But you won't even meet my gaze
Your eyes are filled blue with fear
I see it glisten in the corners of your eyes when you don't think I see you
You're so afraid of letting yourself be seen
You recede into your blue nature
And I'm desperate to pry you away
from your safety net of seclusion
But I'm frightened that you'd crumble into dust without such security
So That will be the way that we remain
Me, in velvet love with the idea of you
And you, too consumed in fear
to cure my disillusion.

We walked through Tennessee snow
In cheap shoes and
Paper socks
We skipped down the slush path
With coffee mud and silver pebbles
Swinging our held hands
between the three of us
We saw life differently that day
The simplest things had a golden sheen
A mysterious bliss
A gentle joy
A cappuccino a latte and a hot chocolate
Ordered and drank in cozy contentment
And we talked in the freezing parking lot
But the longer we conversed
The warmer I felt
Our conversations warming my soul
And we got into our cars with freezing toes and full hearts
And drove away with images of each other
Echoing behind our eyes.

As I sit there silent
Thoughts tumble over each other
Pouring through my mind,
Trying to make it to my tongue
But they trip each other and
Fall and collapse
Before any of them can make it out

So when I sit there silent
It's not because I'm dumb
It's not because I'm young
It's because my mind is a whirlwind
Of thoughts and ideas
That come out as colors and feelings
And strokes and notes and chords
And sorting them out
Into a presentable form
Is like picking through
A junk yard of valuables
Where I want to keep everything
But it won't all fit in my arms
So it slips through and I'm left
With nothing
On top of my tower
Of precious thoughts
That I can't hold together

You ask how I am and what I think
But do you really want to know
The turmoil and loss and confusion
That mixes so strangely with
Confidence and success and calm
Because right now my body
Is a pulsing mass of contradiction
And containing and controlling my
Scattered mind
Is a deeply daunting task

So when I sit there silent
It's not because I'm dumb
And it's not because I'm young

It's because the articulation of the dizzying complexity that constantly swims in my mind
Requires time and effort to unwind
And I panic when you look at me
With those ever expectant eyes
Because I'm afraid you think I'm dumb
And I'm afraid you think I'm young
But time has passed
And still my thoughts suspend
in a tangled mess
Knotted and ragged behind my tongue

And so
I sit there silent

We spin through magnetic nights
Falling in love with each others
Laughs and quirks
As we sail down streets
On wheels of joy
And bounce grey pebbles
Off copper train tracks
And feel cold wind play with out hair
As the train shoots past our deeply alive eyes
Spinning through magnetic nights