I think about her all the time
The look in her eyes and the way she smiles, and I wish
That someday, somehow I could be her star
To hold her close and keep her warm when it rains
But for now, all I could do is wait
For her to notice me, a girl I call Jane.

She was the first girl I noticed, this girl I call Jane
After a year full of misery and wasted time.
Like a pretty rainbow after the rain,
She came into my life~breathtaking yet so unreachable like a star
So I tried to hide how I felt and made myself wish
That she was never worth the wait.

I try hard each day to avoid looking at her eyes, like stars
They shine so brightly even when it rains
And it never gets easier every time
To just sit around and hope and wait
For her to notice me, that girl I call Jane
But I can dream, can't I? I can dream, and I can wish.

The moment finally came when I could no longer wait
For the girl forever, the girl I call Jane
So I sent her a message~a secret wish
That I'd be worthy for a minute of her time
And one fateful night when everything went right, we talked about the stars
As the seconds turned into hours while I stood there in the rain.

But the sun has permanently set in my life, and permanently it rains
Permanently I'm left with nothing but to permanently dream and to permanently wait
On a bed of nails without her, without Jane
And every night as I close my eyes, I'd wish
For another chance to be with her~another time
But I'm not the one that she wants; I'm not her star.

And if God could grant me just one wish,
May she crash into me like a shooting star
Because my heart's gone cold from all this wait
From all these thoughts concerning Jane
But if this love is a thunder, then bring on the rain
To help me drown her out for the last time.

Tonight I'll look up at the sky and make a wish upon a star
But until the day it comes true, I'd wait here forever patiently in vain under the rain
For time to find me a place in the diary of Jane.

It starts as a faint buzz in your ears
Then you ignore it for days, even years
"It's no big deal. I'm okay," you say
"It will probably just go away."

But it never did, to your displeasure
You did say "probably" for good measure
And you wonder if that single seed of doubt
Would be how your tomorrow turns out

The buzzing grows louder like the chattering of birds
Prefixes and suffixes, but not quite words
You try to make sense of it, but try is all you accomplish
Your only clue is it was spoken in English

Days rolled by without end
The sounds seemed harder to comprehend
But soon enough, you started hearing a tiny voice in your head
The day the batteries went dead

And you take off the headphones you've been wearing all your life
Surprised to discover a world full of violence and strife
I guess that old saying is true, it appears
We only hear what we want to hear

But you can hear me now, can't you?
Tell me you hear the cries of the widows and the fatherless, too
This war is a lie; that is all it ever was
And devour our humanity is all it ever does

But hearing never really gets us anywhere
Tell me what do you do now that you're aware?
Will you march on the streets and spread the word?
Or will you go on pretending like you never heard?

Tell me, tell me, tell me what to do
Good men are dying and we are, too
Open up your eyes; can't you see?
I am you and you are me

The voices grew into cacophony
A harsh, discordant sound devoid of harmony
Into a crescendo it roared along with the bombs of war
Slowly revealing to us the monsters that we are

First went Little Boy then down went Fat Man
The loudest noise ever created by man,
248 decibels, ending a tale of two cities
And then ... silence.

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

Each ear another one to lie to
Each mouth another one to feed
We're all but a statistic
And a very ugly one indeed

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

Hypocrites in their pedestals
As the sloths complain
The truth is hypothetical
And the self-righteous disdain

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

The sky scraping towers
The roads of traffic and rush
Beauty is only in the papers
And the tip of the artist's brush

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

Cold hearts shame the winter
Causing more damage than flood
We are but the earth's splinter
And we hunger for blood

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

Tomorrow is but a conjecture
Today is what we're worth
Will our children even have a future?
Or have we aborted them by birth?

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

We have guts for feeling
We have eyes to see
But indifference is more appealing
I hope it's just me

All things dull and normal
All people look the same
All things are but formal
With quite forgettable names

Seems everything happened yesterday
Your tears, my wrongs, our come what may
And here I am now, and there you are
An inch too close yet a mile too far

Seems everything happened yesterday
Your smiles, my songs, our forever and a day
Yet these things failed to outweigh
The tragedy of love that came our way

Seems everything happened yesterday
A day too late, and you're gone away
But if history repeats, I hope it does
Reconstruct my heart to the way it was

Seems everything happened yesterday
But you seem much happier today
And it's all too sad for this still holds true
I miss us every time I look at you

Father, forgive me for I have sinned
I have murdered a man or so it seemed
Why I did it, no one has to know
The truth shall haunt me in hell where I go

Father, give me my last rites
Death has been on countdown the past ten nights
Come dawn, when darkness kisses the light
To the gallows I'll go without a fight

Before I depart, one last meal, you say?
A single black olive with its stone if I may
And in my grave, bury it along with me
May it blossom into a lovely tree

Let this tree be a symbol of my peace
To make these inhumane actions cease
Don't mourn, don't weep; I have forgiven thee
But pray no one follows after me

Fireworks up in the sky,
I wonder how one could ever so
Beautifully burn into the night,
And gracefully, just rise above and die
Leaving all us passers-by
Looking up in awestruck wonder.

Fireworks up in the sky,
I wonder how it feels to be on fire,
To find a place at home with the stars,
And flood the earth with your instantaneous sparks.

Fireworks up in the sky,
How does my life look from way up there?
Am I worth the second try?
Why aren't you giving up?
I would have had given up on me.

And I would have made a wish,
But you're no shooting star,
So I guess I'll just have to do
What everyone else back here on earth does,

Just stop and stare at you,
And wonder how you are.
What would you do,
If you were in my shoes?

If you were in my shoes,
Should I win or should I lose?
If you were in my shoes,
What would you choose?

If you were in my shoes,
Would you still find a way for your light
To be on display for all to see?

Part I: Wendy

When did all this begin?
When did we stop caring, stop hurting, stop bleeding?
When did we rip our hearts out and replace it with something devoid of feeling?
When did we grow contempt of everything we see but the one in the mirror staring?
When did we stop seeing people as people, not just another competition in breathing?
When did we become murders of love with all of this hating?
When did we all cease to be human beings?

Part II: Steven

Enough with all this selfishness, all this me first than you,
        where more is given to the many, and less is given to the few.
Must we act like dogs when they throw us a bone or two,
        or must we behave like humans do?

Stop wasting what you have and wanting what you don't,
        in others, it seems to satisfy, but in reality, it won't.

Let go of all this foolish anger, of all this pointless hate,
        for it grows larger by the hour until you get crushed under its weight.
There's nothing a little love can't compensate,
        and forgiveness is never too late.

Think of others, and only take what you need,
        'though your mouth may be the biggest, it's not the only one to feed.

Get down from that high horse, that pedestal you are standing on,
        for all your talk is cheap, and all it ever does is make us yawn.
We were all created the same, brains and brawn,
        and you are just another lowly pawn.

Don't get blinded by desire, for you will never know
        that a single night could forever ruin your tomorrow.

It's time to take action; there's no time to wait,
        for nothing is accomplished when all we do is procrastinate.
Take a look around; there is no later date,
        so let your love be strong enough to motivate.

Part III: Altair*

We may not be able to make a difference to the world,
but we sure could make a difference on individuals' lives,
and perhaps, what we need is a little bit of foolishness
to help us believe that we could do it,
that we could make a change,
that everything's not lost,
that there's still hope left.


Maybe we could still alter the ending...

If the stars aren't out tonight
I'd stare at your face
I'll find my place
All the riches the world could give
What a smile from you would do
They can't replace

But I can't seem to think of what to do
To get to you

Should I make a pencil sketch of your face so I cannot forget it?
But the colors are all wrong
Black and white don't fit you
I'll start again

Now is it smart if I avoid you?
Because I don't want to fall for you
I'll forget your name
But I can't help myself
The truth is I'm drawn to you
Like a moth to the flame

And I'll find my way to you if it kills me
But I don't know what to say

Can you meet me on a Valentine's Day?
I'd write you a sestina
I would give it all I could and my heart along with that
If all else fails

I heard that you were leaving town and this time it's for good
But what makes it good?

Will you stay if I asked you not to go?
Oh, what am I to do?
But either way I'm still just a hopeless boy
With this song for you
And I know I'm not one to hold you back
So fade into the blue and out of my life

Butterfly, fly away
And leave me here with nothing
But these memories of you
They're enough to hold on to
'Cause I know one day you'll be back
And I will love you with a heart that's big enough for both of us
But for now you're just the girl that I can't live
With or without

This butterfly is flying away from me.
Into the blue, she fades away with the summer
And as raindrops start falling, I know I'll never forget her
But I just can't let it go and commit her into memory.

So I pray for time to take a quick step backwards
That tomorrow would lose its way and never come
But if it should, may it never end for some
Who cannot bear what is to happen afterwards.

But if fate were to take her to a direction opposite mine,
Can the same fate be so kind as to bring her back
The moment I find the courage and strength I now lack?
That someday, somehow our roads may entwine.

And I would lose some sleep if it makes time move slower
For tonight I stay awake, tomorrow I will miss her.

Summer time is over
And you're not to stay
Maybe that is where you belong
Now the rain has come again to wash away
All these things that I've done wrong

All the words I wished I'd ever say
I guess weren't meant to be heard at all
So I'd leave it all to gravity
And come what may
But you aren't there to break my fall

And here I lie staring at the sun
Blinded by the things that could be
But never will be

Autumn came so quickly without a delay
So much for my ever after
But your memories still haunt me
Every single day
You'll forever be my ghost of summer

Maybe we're too late
Maybe this is our fate
Maybe I'm just wasting my time thinking maybe
Maybe it's just me
Maybe we just can't be
Maybe I'm just wasting my time thinking maybe
When it could never be

And here we stand under the dark gray sky
A thousand one miles apart from feeling
And all this time, I'm gazing at the stars
Wondering if you're doing the same thing
Wishful thinking

The path you take
You never thought you would stray
But butterflies are leading you off
So never change your mind to what some people say
'Cause all this time you knew all along
That maybe that is where you belong
And maybe this is where I belong
This is where we'll be lost

by Victor W. Breeser, A Man Who Doesn't*

There's a race of men that fit in so well,
A race that just stands still;
They'll just watch as the whole world goes to hell,
So long as they eat their fill.
They lock their doors, and they board their windows,
And they always say their pray'rs;
They hide in a place where no one knows,
And no one really cares.

Although they walk straight, they don't go far,
For their knowledge is overdue;
They just want things to remain as they are,
And they fear all things new.
They say: "Had that thing never happened,
We won't be struggling like this."
So they refuse change, logic dampened,
But ignorance ain't always bliss.

And each is trapped in his haunted past,
Of that road he failed to take;
So he hides behind a faceless mask,
Another grave mistake.
Each day's a struggle staying sane,
When silence is too much to ask;
Till he stands one day, with an unsound brain,
And the monster is revealed at last.

He's insane, he's insane; he's overflowed his brim;
He has cut a ***** in half.
Life's made a jolly good joke on him,
But now he gets the last laugh.
Ha, ha! He takes life with no regard;
He must be The Devil's kin,
And as heads start rolling, best be on your guard;
There are *monsters who fit in.

What's the matter, my soul?
Are you hungry? Are you cold?
Why so restless? May I ask?
Are you looking for another mask?

Where's the old one? Have you lost it?
Shall we search then without respite?
What is it now that you seek?
Is it certainly at that peak?

Shall we leave then from our orbit?
Is it worth losing ourselves just to find it?
What do you say? Can't you speak?
Or do my eyes have to leak?

Why don't you answer, my soul?
Have your burning heart turned to coal?
I'm dying now, can't you see?
Are we empty, or is it just me?

I miss writing poetry
But the weather demands for art
To find beauty in every fallen tree
And color in a broken heart

I miss writing poetry
But the words they elude me
They found what it means to be truly free
And choose to be or not to be

I miss writing poetry
But my inspiration's not what it used to be
Been a couple of months since my latest entry
Into my poetic potpourri

I miss writing poetry
But the palette's got a hold on me
And if pictures paint words, a thousand and three
I'll just pick up a brush and let the words draw me

"On this very day,
Reminisce the memories
Of this girl I miss."

She inspired me like no one
That the poetry and the honesty just took over
And I opened up and shared my secrets but one
That I was falling for her.

As I found the words to say to let her know
And the courage I then lacked,
The sad news came~she had to go
And I'm not one to hold her back.

So I had to face the bitter truth:
"This butterfly has to fly away."
And time took away a piece of my youth.
I still miss her in every way.

But even if God didn't make her stay,
Still I thank Him all the same
Because if it weren't for this very day,
I would not be calling her your name.