Duck tape on my soul
Screams I'm not whole
They just give me a hug
Saying you're not alone
This has to be a joke
Watching them blow smoke
I wanna die too
Let me smoke with you
Clouds of grey
Draining my lungs
Cigarettes, addiction and Drugs

You'll never believe that I am the secrets and you're the words
Just like I don't want to believe I was the ball and you were the bat
What am I even saying
Why am I still writing
These words don't feel the void in my chest
Church says God bless
But then talk down about you
I can attest
I'm drowning in myself
The beast of my mind is consuming me
How much is left
I have no ambition to fight
I'm weak and you'll never know how it feels to be me
No matter how much you relate
You won't know how much I feel it's in vain
Depressing words to match feelings
Dressed in a uniform
Tears roll down my cheeks
Snot dripping nose
All, just leave me alone
Yes I'm broken hearted because the crack was never sealed
And although I act like a cold blooded murderer
I'm the one dying
I'm fading away
You'll never believe that I am the secret and you're the words
The ones I never heard
I don't know myself
Death is stuck in my head
These words you're reading don't mean a thing
Just another broken soul
Probably nothing original
Everyone feels pain
These emotions are cliche
Nothing, still got the same feeling

Unhappy endings
I never have what I need
And I'm too weak to voice my pleads
I tried before and the only thing I got was the name desperate
I'm drowning in thoughts
What is the cost?
Possibly my sanity

Two white dots
What gives?
Why are you writing this?
That is you and this is me
What do you mean?
We're exactly the same
2 of a kind
1 is such a lonely number
And you're lonely all the time
The thing about dots is that they can be erased
You won't stay
Maybe I will maybe I won't
If I don't will you give in ?
Probably not because I'd never give in
I'll probably never love again
Why is this ?
My heart is not mines to give  
Whose possession is it left with ?
His
He abandoned it!
Some place it's hiding where I can't reach
But love is the thing you seek?
No, I just don't want to be lonely
You don't have to be
Two white dots
What gives?
Why are you writing this?
This is you and me
What do you mean?
We're exactly the same
Nothing?
But an empty blank space
Ran off and concealed
You could build
But instead you ****
You **** with your looks and your mean words
You're not the only person who hurts
You're not the only one without closure
But if you look deep within
You don't need to find it through him
Your heart is still inside you
It's sitting, waiting and ready to be unbruised
You've just been stuck in this ruse
That reconciling with him is what you need to do

Today it rained
As if to mock the pain of the day
I knew I was alone and had no friends
But to have the evidence smack me in the face
Was another thing
I knew but I wasn't prepared
They claimed they loved me but would they care if I was dead
I'm overthinking
Thoughts get out of my head
No one cares about my life
So why would they care about my death
Of course I won't be the reason I die
Because then my soul would be in an eternal hell
Unlike here there will be no bail
ill judgement was passed
Yesterday I was on top of the world
Today I just crashed
They say the day you enter the world is the most painful of your life
And we don't even remember
But who would
No one asked for this we're just here
Just like my unwanted tears

You love me
You hate me
I speak the truth
Yet lie, knowing you never knew
I am the one who pretends not to care
And laughs at the jokes that are my reality (what's really there)
They think I'm pretty
They think I'm smart
The strife in my life is they don't even know me
Read my story
Take a look
Picture book.... (a piece of art)
No photos of me
because all I see is the inside and it's ugly
I had something..... (I'm a mess)
Now it's gone
Can't help but feel like a pawn
My heart was already broken
Lost touch with my soul (I've gone numb)
Forced out smiles
Actress play pretend... (play dumb)
No pain will surface
Burry it in the earth or let the scars be cremated (I should've never been created)
All that I am
All that I'll ever be
Is spilled ink. (I'm on the pages)