But I do.
I feel the same way and God ******, I want to tell you.
But how would you feel about that?
Would you think that I'm saying it just to soothe your fears and vulnerability?
Would you think that I'm being sympathetic and saying it out of guilt?
I'm not.
I promise.
I love you.

You struck me down with love like a lightening bolt

The life span of a red blood cell is 120 days...
This means that part of you is no longer who you were four months ago.

The first night without you, I cried like an abandoned child and bit my fingernails for the first time in years. I drank straight from a bottle of wine I snuck from the pantry. I spun violently around my room, letting an angry record spin. Later, I hit my fist against the wall of the shower as I washed off all my shame and anger in ice cold water. Then I spent the rest of that godawful night shivering in my bed like the shattered heart that I was, my skin shaking and rising over my fragile bones. And no one knew, and no one knew...

Get out of my head

Do you recognize your own vulnerability?

I'm so ******* sick of worrying abut you and thinking about what you're doing get out get out *get out

I spent hours in your arms
and realized that there was no place
I would rather be

Don't give it a hand, offer it a soul
Honey, make this easy.
Leave it to the land, this is what it knows
Honey, that's how it sleeps.
Don't let it in with with no intention to keep it
Jesus Christ, don't be kind to it.
Honey don't feed it, it will come back.

I think I need to find a bigger place
Cause when you have more than you think, you need more space

Don't you dare say I didn't try.
You have no idea how hard I tried.
I tried
I tried
I tried

Every time I feel the flames licking at my heels,
you swoop down and save me from being engulfed.
I never have to tell you, you just... do.
How do you do it?
How do you know?

I will never be who you wanted me to be

You gave me a bottle of lavender even though you knew I hated it.
I only opened it twice - when I received it and that night.
I found that bottle last night, hidden away in dark corners.
The minute I opened it, I regretted it.
The once sweet smell was putrid.
I coughed and heaved and felt tears ***** my eyes.
No. Please no.
...
Never again. Never.
The memory passed and I saw red.  
I gripped the tiny bottle until my knuckles turned white.
With power I didn't know I had, I threw that bottle at the wall.
It shattered, just like everything else...
So I opened my window and let the world know of your sin.

Your breathing was shallow
And I longed for it's warmth
Against my goosebump covered neck

You're filling every crack and I am not objecting

Through it all, my heart continues to ache for you.

It would be a lie
to say that I love someone
more than I loved you

You make me nauseous. ******* sick. I am disgusted. Revolted.
How did I ever? ****, how did I ever?

Don't haunt me
Gather up the lost and sold
Into your arms
Gather up the pitiful
In your arms
What seems impossible
I think I have had my fill
*I think I should give up the ghost

You're only a disappointment if you allow yourself to be

The heart knows what the mind does not

I broke my heart
before you had
the chance to.

When this world upsets me,
this music sets me free

Today I ripped up the first "I love you" note you ever gave me.
It felt good, admittedly.
It felt like fearlessness.
It felt like freedom.

The pressure is gone -- thank god, you love me still.

It's you, you ******* idiot. You're the one causing your own issues. Are you so blind? For ***** sake. Idiot. ******* IDIOT.

It's a swing of the hips
and a flick of the wrist
that puts me
at the starting point

How many nights have I spent with my lanky arms wrapped around a long ago chest caved in, whispering to the wind "I don't want to be here, please help me".

Genius in one way.
Idiot in another.
Which one will make you happy?
Which one will take you further?

Tears stain my pillow and I wonder how many of them were shed for you

I'll spend the rest of my life blaming myself for something you did

I'm tired of dealing with something so unimportant

I spent weeks coughing up blood, but now it races through my veins

"I think I love you. ****, I know it's way too early and things with Rachel didn't end well and you probably aren't ready to say anything along those lines, but... I had to say it or I would've exploded. You don't have to say it back, Leigh. I just had to, still have to, say it.... I love you I love you I love you."

Every time I look at you, I don't understand
Why you let the things you did get so out of hand
You would've managed better if you had it planned

I threw away your things today.
Love letters, fake flowers, incense, clothes.
You gave it to me, it's gone.
I can't stand to look at you, let alone the things you left behind.
So I got rid of it all.
Now, I'm a little bit freer.