I see fire
burning in the eyes
of a gunman.
I see fire
burning in the smile
of a terrorist.
I see fire
burning in the fingertips
of a child molester.
I see fire
burning in the hearts
of the people who want to make a difference.

As I fixed your collar,
my fingertips barely
grazed your pulse
but it was just enough
to feel the blood rushing
underneath your skin.
Pulse quickened: check.
I only had to make
brief eye contact,
look up
and down again,
to see the expansion
of your pupils.
Eye dilation: check.
Don't think that
I didn't
hear or feel
the breath you didn't
realize you
were holding in.
Shortness of breath: check.
Hmm.
Interesting.

You're forgetting the meaning
of love behind a relationship.
You're making everything
related to
making love
rather than
creating love.
Don't confuse the two
or you'll lose it all.

The smell of you
drifts through the air,
fooling my lips
and my heart
into thinking
that you're
still here.

At the end of the day,
I can lay my head
against a pillow that
smells of sweet vanilla
and know that
you
are
mine.

You are everywhere
yet all at once,
gone in the mist.
Why do you hide?
The sun shines
it's brightest
in front if it's sister moon.
Let your light
seep through
the delicate cracks
in your skin.
Like stained glass,
rainbows transcend
and break barriers.
Your glory
makes itself known.
You show your heart
again and again.
I am blinded,
but do not
shield my eyes
for I would miss
your beauty.

I find myself
wondering what
your hand
would feel like
in mine.

Simply,
we are a rock  
revolving around
a great ball of fire.
Say you'll
remember me
when it all
ends.

Abandonment
Resentment
Embarrassment
Harassment
Replacement
Punishment
Imprisonment
Detachment
Torment
Misjudgment  
Sentiment

If we are made to survive,
then why is surviving so difficult?

"John's dead. He's been shot."
  
Who would **** John? Why now? Why not '65, when half of America wanted him dead? Oh, God. I'm going to faint. I'm going to be sick. This isn't real. This isn't happening. He's alive, yes, he's alive. Living, breathing, alive. It was just a joke, some freak calling me just to get a response from a Beatle. No, Lin, I don't believe it. Are you sure? Is he...? Jesus Christ... Jesus ******* Christ... The **** of all jerks... I gotta get in the studio. George? Yes, I know. I know. Yeah, you still in the mood to get in the studio? Alright, I'll see you there. No, that doesn't sound right... Play it back again. That's fine. George, I'm... I'm gonna go. It's just too hard, ya know? I thought it would help, but it didn't. I'll call you. Oh, I was very shocked, ya know. It's terrible news. Um, I was just listening to some stuff, ya know, I just didn't want to sit at home. I didn't feel like it. This morning some time. Yeah.
**Drag, isn't it?

No, you don't understand.
You were not the one
who crawled out of bed
in the middle of the night.
You were not the one
opening the bottle of pills
and cursing when three fell to the floor.
You were not the one
with the repetition of
"Just do it!" playing in your head.
You were not the one
holding the cold glass
of water in your shaking hand.
You were not the one
putting five, six, seven pills
past your trembling lips.
You were not the one
who climbed back into bed,
waiting impatiently for death.
You were not the one
who unfortunately woke the next afternoon
with a dry mouth and aching body.
No, you don't understand.

Run.
Dribble.
Jump.*
Send the ball through the orange hoop,
   another "nothing but net" shot.
Quick hands and even quicker feet.
"Yes! Do it again!"
Again and again and again...
The wing,
   corner,
      top of the key.
Every spot on the court.
Remember the elbow.
Follow through with the fingertips.
Run left, run right.
Better.
Faster.
Stronger.
**God, I missed this.

Go ahead and throw away
   love for lust,
but don't come crying to me
   when it turns into
      unbearable pain.

And I guess there's a hidden fear
that if you cheat on this,
what else will you willingly cheat on?

You always come to mind
when winter rolls around.
I can't help but to recall the time
we spent burning marshmallows
by the bonfire in your backyard
or how your mother would make
hot chocolate and beckon to
our hiding place underneath your comforter.
I remember the winter of freshmen year,
after we had grown up and apart.
Out of jealousy that was unnecessary,
my heart ruined everything.
It took so long to get Us
back to normal...
Nearly two years.
Now here we are,
closer by heart than by body.
A little bit older, a little bit colder.
Let's see what this winter brings.

Some say that a year is a short period of time
and that it practically flies by.
But when you think about,
I mean really think about it,
so much happens in a year.
You have so much time...
365 days to wake up, look at your scars, and say "Thank God I'm alive".
52 weeks (plus one day) to work on getting a promotion at work.
8,765 hours to get over that boy from chemistry class.
526,000 minutes to watch your baby girl grow up.
31.6 million seconds to breathe in and breathe out.
One year to live your life.
Isn't it amazing?
Isn't it quick?

I broke my heart
before you had
the chance to.

I have loved you too late,
Beauty so ancient and so new.
I have loved you too late.
You were with me but I was not with you.
I was away from you, running after the beauties which you have made.
The things which exist only through you kept me far away from you.
You have called, cried out and pierced my deafness.
You have enlightened me, and my blindness is
   banished by your brightness.
I have tasted you and I am hungry for you.
You have touched me and I am on fire with longing to embrace you.

They say
you get
just what you
pay for,
but
what is this
love
worth?

I want
to go somewhere
that doesn't require
you
to check
and see if anyone is
watching us.
I want
to hold your hand
without you
looking out of the corner
of your eye,
making sure
no one is
throwing us
***** looks.
I want
to look at you
lovingly
without having to worry
about someone
catching on.
So let's escape,
run free,
get away
from this place.
You and I
against
the world.

I'm sick
of being hit
with your
sharpened daggers.
What makes you
think that
my heart
is protected by an
impenetrable
shield?
It's covered in scars,
bruised and damaged.
The slightest mention
of an insecurity
and I'll break,
crash,
and burn.
You don't even care.
You don't even *see.

Who can talk to fools
but the one
who speaks
their language?

The look in your eyes
lays me bear --
arms needing,
chest heaving,
heart bleeding.

Imagine if the world was devoid of all color.
Red wouldn't be the color of the apple's
   that grew on your grandparent's orchard.
Yellow wouldn't be the color of the sunset
   that sets over the ocean's edge.
Blue wouldn't be the color of the eyes
   that gleam and sparkle behind your lover's lashes.
Imagine if the world was devoid of all color
and nothing looked quite the same
as it did the hour, day, life before.

I found myself in the music of
the Beatles --
In drastic rise and sultry fall of
John Lennon's voice.
In the rhythmic sound of
Paul McCartney's bass.
In the hauntingly beautiful chords of
George Harrison's guitar.
In the solidity and beat of
Ringo Starr's drums.
They helped me find
the life
that I thought had
drained out of me
long ago.
All four of them
pulled my heart
out of my chest,
patching and healing it
until it was whole again.
For them,
I am grateful.
Because of them,
I am alive.

Maybe you became
the girl
who wears black
because your mother
told you
that no color
looked "good"
against your
pale skin
and
bleeding heart.

I've spent
the past week
trying to muster up
a piece of writing
that could even
come close
to expressing
my love for
you.

In those seven days,
I took a different approach.
I wrote
2 haikus
   with my hands
3 ballads
   with my lips
and
4 sonnets
    with my heart.

No,
my love may not
be poured into
a poem --
typed up
and posted here --
but  
it's there and
it's real and
it breathes.

I have chased highs
down the shafts of
hundreds of needles,
but none compare to the
feeling your love brings.

The dark crescents
under your eyes
become
indicators of
stress and wear.
Wrinkles line
your forehead
where smooth skin
once presided.
Cracks
in your heart
become visible
to those around you --
it's the absence
of light
in your eyes,
it's the lack
of enthusiasm
in your laugh.
At the end of
the day,
you find yourself
staring into the mirror...
Wondering when life
passed you by.

Tell me exactly why the **** my love isn't enough for you.
******, haven't I given you everything?
How can you say that you give me everything,
indicating that I give you any less.
I've given you my heart and soul and body.
What more is there to give?
I am enough.
*Enoughenoughenough.

In a drug and alcohol induced haze,
You were finally able to cry.
But I'm left with a trailing question:
Why?
You never cry in front of me.
It's like an unspoken rule.
Are you scared of who you're becoming?
Are you scared of what you've become?
I am.
It's like I've lost you completely.
Yeah, things go back to normal when we're together,
   but who are you when I'm not looking?
I'm worried about you.
I'm worried that you're losing yourself to the black dog
   and that I won't be able to rescue you this time.
When I said you could come to me with anything,
   I meant it whole heartedly.
You are still my first love, the only boy I've ever waited for.
*I'm still here.

I thought we were done.
You had become a stranger, a figment of my imagination.
But now you're back and you're weakening me.
I can't even find the strength to smile.
My girlfriend asks me to talk, but I can't without bursting into tears.
And for what?
I'm worn from the strain of pretending to be alright.
Step back.
Go bother someone else (but I'd rather you didn't).
Leave me alone.

With disdain,
Leigh

I find
solace
in your lips,
peace
in your heart.

Isn't it funny
how we go to school
after spending shiftless nights
reading each other's poetry
and act as if
we haven't seen a small fraction
of souls
so well hidden
under white shirts
emblazoned with the school crest?

"I'm so glad you're here."*

A sentence that holds more meaning than
you will ever know.

When I say it, I mean it two ways --
"I'm glad you're with me, someone so undeserving."
and
"I'm glad you're still with us, a world so undeserving."

My love, there would be no me without you.
You couldn't have come at a more perfect time.
Ending it would have been easy, simple.
I had it all planned out.
Hell, I had tried.
But the light you hold inside gave me hope.
Never have I been so grateful.

The only thing more deserving of you is the world itself --
Had you left us, you would not have touched so many hearts.
You have such a strength and a drive.
Put your mind to it, you could change the world.
You matter more than you think.

In all sincerity, I thank you.
Your love brought me out of the darkness.
I would not be where I am today without you.
I adore you completely and endlessly.

No free verse
         haiku
            or sonnet
could ever portray
the amount of love
this beating,
bleeding heart
holds for
you.

I wake to find
your hand
on my hip
and your name
on my heart.

I dislike the number seven.
It will forever remind me of July.
And thinking of July just causes my mind to darken all over again.

I lost a large part of the love I had for you as I read those texts.
You said you would never hurt me like he did
-- over and over and over --
   but you lied.
You hurt me more than he ever did.

I TRUSTED YOU.
God ******, I trusted you.

Will I ever forgive (completely)?
Maybe.

Will I ever forget?
No.
Never.
Heartbreak is like a dark stain on a white tablecloth --
You can try to cover it up, but it's always there.

I'm still hurting.
It still makes me cry...
You broke my heart.
   and I am still relying on myself to mend it.

Let's get lost
in music
in our words
in each other
I don't want to know
where I end
and where you begin
Let's lose ourselves
in eyes of love
and passion
Don't think
Just stay here
by my side
I promise
that you won't
know what
hit you

Your eyes
play music
of the softest violin
up
down
the melody sways
with the shifting light
of hidden love