Laughes.
Smiles.
Giggles.
Everything without me.
They don't even notice
I've been there many a times
But not enough to be considered one of them
So I ask myself,
How do I change to fit in?
Then I laugh,
Remembering the fact that I'm nothing to them
No reason to pay attention
Nothing special.
It's the internal struggle I hid,
Knowing I'm not worthy
And will always be everybody's nothing.

You sat there with me
looking deep into my eyes,
I thought you knew me,
That for once I wasn't alone.
But then she came
Blonde and bubbly.
Caught your attention
Then you started running
right after her,
leaving me there to think,
It all has to end sometime soon.
I guess I should have held on to those times,
That she stole from me.
I thought I was special,
but I was for only that moment.

At least pretend
if just for tonight
that you care enough
to make it all right.
At least pretend
if just for tonight
that you love me
and wish to hold me tight.
At least pretend
if just for tonight
that you want me
before I lose all sight
of what may be real in my life.
Please be here for me
like you were before
because honestly
I wouldn't ask for anything more.

Small chill in the air,
a smell you never forget,
red, orange, and yellow paint the tree-full horizon.
The leaves brush my face
as the fall gracefully down,
reminding me why I love September.
School buses fill the streets once again,
stopping at every corner.
Kids run to each of their houses
filled with stories of their day away.
Maybe it's these feelings
that make this all okay,
to love the way
the leaves fall,
gracefully.

Silence is painful.
Silence can ****.
Silence screams the truth
you don't want to hear.
It creeps up on you
before you know it
you're ****** in.
No way to get out.
You'd never say these out loud,
they're loud enough in your mind.
They're the things you want to forget,
but silence brings them back.
All the memories flood your mind.
You can try to push them back out,
but silence shoves it back.
Silence is my enemy.
Something i fear meeting.
Something i hate facing.
Silence is painful.
Silence can ****.
Silence screams the truth
you don't want to hear.

i once was brave
i used to fight
people looked up to me
but it was all a lie
i wake up each morning
a little past six
praying today be better than the last
i dust off my mask
that sits all alone
maybe someday i can go without it
without fear
without worries
that's a life i would like to live
instead i sit here
like a bird waiting to fly
but i'm too scared to spread my wings
that i keep glued to my side
maybe someday i'll get that courage
that i once had when i was little