I saved my day
by sorting through and throwing away
I saved the bottle of rosé
I chose again
a story dipped in red
they all come from my head
I stole the look
It was the only thing I took
I chose the movie over the book

And I don't even want it
I don't even hear the things she says
I don't want to go down on her
I don't wanna tell her its the end
I can't really do things for her
I can only be a friend
I don't want to go down on her
I don't wanna tell her its the end

Don't make me less soft
I want my fingertips to alternate
touch tip underneath
I'm not cold in your way
this is a sacred space
back drops
constellation of wrong movements
merge me with the source
unlike him
we have reference slits so we sit
in the right place
at the right
location
while I stand on a different coast
This was the final line I wrote
then tore out the page
dipped it in water
pasted it to something
more permanent than an internet connection
don't make me less soft
or you will find yourself
somewhere less sacred
with a loss of touch

It might rain on you
and you might get curious about the universe
I asked Emma why she always brought these things up
we work best as a team
to be ambitious and to plant seeds are different things
feed the jungle and the jungle will love you back

I will never forget how green I looked
when I saw my reflection in mother of pearl

my poetry is not a metaphor

with something new
not to be seen

it sits deep and you know its real
when the wind flows between your fingers
the water isolates thoughts
and nothing hurts anymore
i feel free

The sun shines at a different angle
on this side of the planet
my feet are crusted with paint
my hands only carry flowers
I am an artist
who has forgotten how to think
I am a human
fueled by the energy of sound
I am not stagnant
I am just contemplating other doors

you can run without shoes
and get lost in the dirt
but know that this is a city
and you will always fertilize the soil

Are you a night owl?
Do you save the darkness for observation?
Do you listen to soul on Sundays?
Do you remember how many steps you took?
Do you live in a city?
Or wish that you did?
Who is your conversation starter?
I remember July but wonder what it would be like if I didn't

Trust me when I say that she sees you clearly
but her phone was stolen
and now she only wants the things that want her

Goodbye to dreams of Los Angeles.

i never when home
i never packed that bag that I thought you owned
but always kept a key
I put it in my house with my new family
tell me what you need
what's the time there?
is it two or three?
i was only 18
new phone number
new id

build a house
with walls made of doors
that are always left open
invite everyone over
to have collaborative conversations
about wide open spaces

We are on the roof listening to Frank Sinatra
Where did you come from?
I never wear lime green crochet and necklaces from Turkey
The Magician attracted what I was least expecting
love like la luz
poetry like a new diamond
who let you sit with my crystal in your hand?
me I guess
finishing the story from a past life
ill see him soon where words seem unreachable
the grass is more than dead
and this isn't a teenage blue
but until then we play with sleepy dogs
the glory of nighttime
and a full moon in Taurus
goodnight from a different time zone

should I have told her?
I sit alone on weekdays
to find a space that touches the sun
I remember how the debt collectors
want a handwritten letter
I pen-pal a girl from Oregon
these days my socks are always *****
and I don't remember his middle name
I like it this way
Saturn is mean to me
she wants me to be strong
you have to understand this
I go far to find home
and always take her with me.

two cards telling me
the flowers dried out
but they are still there
dusty and forgotten
where did you think 8 moons could take you
in another lifetime maybe
when the seeds are planted at the right time
and the skies are blue
and you will look at what challenged you so much

I can drive all night
I can drive to find you
it won't save me
It won't save anyone

but I can drive all night
I can find peace on the highway
I can drive to you
If you call my name

I found you in my miso soup
I found you in that restaurant
I found you on the metro
I found you losing track of time
I found you in the book I'm reading
I found you yesterday
and I find you again today

I write for a sense of security
in an obscure world
to walk in your shoes
is to accept your way of breathing
I pray for lunch
I pray to the moon
I watch you talk about dreaming
and I start to remember mine
in a few years will you have a solution?
or is living in this state the answer?

We create piles of books between us in bed
I want you back in my head
I travel seas
I find you again

To be in solitude is to be strong
To be in companionship is to be part of a whole
I get visions from moments that don't exist
I get poetry from deep corners of my pockets
We wake at 2:10 only to drink coffee at 6

I run backward to find where I went wrong
I ask the cards what my favorite color is then try again

I am holy with my visions and rough on the edges
I've stripped my femininity
only to find someone more forgiving beneath

Inspiration, muse, and black coffee all fit into the same category
we all need more sleep
we all try too hard
one day it will be easier to write your name on a city
but for now we fight for passion
and work for love

it is easy to play the wrong game

how much longer
until im like my father
black truck
pick up
just enough
new ink
turquoise sink
wash myself clean
and wonder
how much longer
till I'm like my father
cross the boarder
I feel I'm older
black truck
pick up
just enough

in a heat of yellown and brown
I damp everything quickly
so all holds moisture overnight
I smudge my hands
making the oil even all over
and I start to run
run fast to my home
to clean for people I love and people I don't know
I'm so happy I could cry right here on this metro bench
does it matter the things we said that day?
does it matter the things we will say on another?
I feel alive now and I'm excited to see people smile in my kitchen
I love it when she comes into my room when we are unwell
I might never be able to tell her in the right way
composing a language from all of my pasts and all of hers
they may not translate
but if I can feel the love I have for her in the eyes of a stranger
I know my time with her has been a free fall
down a path where we are living in our souls pocket
writing love letters and hate letters
in our head like its an occupation
spilling them out on our white tile floor
moping and only spreading things around more
at least its even all over
at least its both of ours

its a blister bandaid sock combination
its the yesterday tomorrow combination
its the dried up and fresh lawn
its the untied knot and TV combination
its remembering the rainbow trout and forgetting every birthday you were ever told
its the roads that never touched but ran parallel through three cities
they shared the same median for many miles
we walked in the middle of it
our legs tired into the earth
rocks rust rush
we saw the moving forward and looking back combination
the coffee and 7 pm combination
    call dad
    figure out situation
    mint new keys
    pack clothes in the wicker basket
now that I know I'm leaving I savor every day like a coughdrop
it's not too cold and it's not too warm
the song that played was 666 so I turned my phone upside down
traded it for a pen
humbled me with a piece
the one that has a map yet knows no future combination

shallow bowl
half of a whole
peering into my peers
carving a small hole
silk
sweat
salt
small
skin
shapes
song
swinging between two sides
one that's friendship
one that's at the bottom of the bowl
I've known you for a while now
but you haven't always smelt this way
I met you when it was only sweat
met/melt
met/melt
met/melt
met/melt

you got it good
get away weekend
cross country mission
you got the warm heat
a big jacket with big shoulders
you dress it down
you consider parts less worn in
you got it good
a friend as a lover
saying all the right things
going another day
solving the song
surrendering to solitude
you listen to molly neilson and it feels true
swallowing things whole
remembering how it started
you got it good