My heart fills with decay:
its torn and broken.

You left me speechless
on the 13th day.

The only thing that
reminds me of  you
is a token of love
clinging to my chest.

It saddens me you
can forget me fast:
know deep down
things aren't
meant
to
last.

I was getting over the worst:
my sun shining but
now its eclipsed
by the Earth.

I'm blind bound by chains
leaving me
in
eternal
shame.

Your ring reminds me
your never far apart.

You once entered my dreams
filled  it up with romance
and passion: the wine
we consumed:  rhythm of dance.

These visions fade:
you caste
my heart
with
your
sword.

You
wore me
into the ground:
turning
my
bitter
smile
upside down.

All I wanted was respect:
lest you forget.

I don't want
to feel this
way no more.

A huge dark
cloud floats
it sways
exploding with
ice and thunder
sprays
darkens up
my sunny days.

I can see eyes
they pop out
of skull bruised
and torn .

I can hear terrible
screams of sirens
calling out my name.

Their flesh crawling
closer to my face
sweat and fear
makes me shake.

I wish I knew
what went wrong
darkness in the
horizon sinks
the ship's course
colliding with my
battered heart,
its feeling darker
than before.

All I can muster
up is a grim smile.
Happiness and Love
fell apart.
Dignity and Pride
came too late.

I wish I can feel
the golden shine
of a hundred spring
days. The barks of
puppies, aroma
of rose and the warmest
smile of a stranger.

True happiness is
a gem to show:
the very seeds of
life I want to sow.

The words we read:
conjured up figures,
concepts, new ideas  
we want an closure:
a nice happy ending:
another question,
a cliche, a solution
hope to fight
off this condition.
  

That inner voice,
tells us what we
should do.
The critic,
the karma
the inner spirit
gliding through storms:
trudging across murky waters
but can we all
squeeze in that
same boat.

Words are pain
they are there to educate:
devour us with pleasure:
smoother dreams with color.
Nothing is ever black or
white its more grey all over.
  
Words are the
most potent
force that we can muster.
They are always free to change:
and are unpredictable
as the weather.
  
You can never buy words
they are immortal
unbreakable and
are challenging to decipher.
One minute they make you feel
a million times better.
The next they leave you on the sidewalk
with nothing but naked pride.
You can never really measure
the costs at the horror
of words that turn a sane man
insane.

Twisted butterfly wings  
silence your tongue
bruises and marks
conceal your flesh
with black and white
splodges.
shadows blow you
a kiss that twists
your ballerina feet
into a dance
Your eyes half shut,
half open hearing
whispers of verse
that turn into song.

The cliffs that point up:
are faded grey dissembled
finger hung by the thorns
Rats scurry gnaw at the flesh
the poisonous injection
of snakes seeping
danger lurking
in each crevice.  

Shadows leaping forward:
circling gown of fire:
swords made of ice
impaling the heart
the air whispers:
the shadowy feet
are never far apart
of horses that scurry
through the night.

You were an hot swirling vortex
raining down fire sprouting
out the sky the floating sunset
shining light across the murky
water. You lit up gardens
with red splodges of paint.
Summer rises up the streets:
warming up the air,
flowers are sprouting:
birds sing
flutes are playing
the seeds are about to sow

Can never pinpoint what's
making me down:
feel I want to deep down explode:
Some thing holds me back
she slaps me in the face,
snapping incoherent mutterings
to my face.
I feel this frightened baby,
when I see this cynical old lady.    

My mind moves quickly
to avoid her glazed stare.
She's always looking back
at the disappointment
than moving forward.  
She can never rest.

I wish I could really just smile
again.
Would it just be another  lie?


Just another way
to build up
unstable barriers.
I want the pain
to cease.  

Wearing another mask
to conceal what
I deep down feel.

Bottling up
the pain,
just to appear
happy and sane.

Forgetting the horrible flashbacks,
when you watched
first hand the bad things
that people have done to you:
looking in another direction
pretending it never happened.
when they were the ones that
made you feel that way.
The smashing up, fighting,    
sexist culture of pigs
who manipulate weaker minds
with constant flashbacks of  abuse,  
torture, black mail and mind games
sugarcoated with even more lies.

Sometimes wish my mind
would turn off and forget
and start a fresh
but it won’t do that.
its something in me which
keeps replaying over and over
very nasty scenes in the past
and making it worst
until your mind can’t take and
won't give no more good
to anyone else.
It turns you out and there is
just nothing left
and it ends with you
seeing more of death.