I haven’t felt single this entire week
Even though we broke up

I didn’t feel single until today
When I saw your status change
Who’d have thought that a status change would be the breaking point?
The point where you almost feel like giving up
The point where your heart actually feels broken
And there’s a pain in your stomach

I’m past the point of being sad
And I don’t quite feel empty
And I don’t feel like I’ve lost anything
But I do feel angry
I do feel like I’ve been ****** around
I do feel lied to
And that pit in my throat is forming again
Making me want to *****

I still have faith in myself and our friendship
But do you?

I love it when you surprise me
Showing up at the café to say, “HI”
Taking a chance that I may be working
You came in the other day on your own accord
No one was with you this time
I was on your mind and you wanted to say, “HI”

It’s one of the best days I’ve had since we broke up
It shows that you’re coming around
The frustrating part is that you’re still fighting me
So determined to be single
You’re fighting your feelings when you should really just let go!

Did the turtle ever forgive the scorpion for stinging him and killing them both?
I know the scorpion forgives the turtle for being so naïve
The scorpion feels guilty
The scorpion is guilty
The scorpion is me
And I am guilty for caring
Guilty for trying to fix you
I am guilty for trying to understand
And guilty for letting you fall into the wrong hands

Remind me of where I stand and who I compete against
Make me jealous and blind again, my heart was left cold as ice
Make me feel ***** and cheap and used
What more damage could you possibly do?
Talk ***** to me, even though it doesn’t turn me on
Whisper in my ear the things you wish to do to me
And then put those dreams into action
Drag my soul through the rain and leave me high in an alley
And forget me in the morning

But before you leave me, withered and rotting
Don’t forget to tell me how psychotic I am
And how I cared too much for you
Or possibly didn’t quite care enough
Talk my face down into the pavement, kick my heart around like a soda can
Talk those ***** mean words to me, Because it’s all I can stand

Seattle, so full of angry and bitter memories
Failed love affairs, dreams and careers
Seattle the Black Hole! We call it
Stifling people’s hopes
Raining on everyone’s parade

I am happy for those who are happy here
And I feel for those who are not
Miscommunications fill the air
Much like the *** smoke fills the small niches of building entryways
The streets are flooded with STD’s and STI’s
And all around me I see my friends dying
Dying from drug addictions and failed marriages
Dying from being accused by their own judgmental minds
They are all dying; rotting from the inside

Seattle, the most beautiful hypocritical city I know

I forgot how much you like to drive
You always said that driving gave you a sense of freedom
It made you feel better
Blasting your music and singing
The smell of burning rubber coming off the tires
The wind on your face when the window is down
And the wiper blades squeaking as they wipe off the rushing Seattle rain

Driving fast helps you breathe
Calms you down, helps you focus
Just continue talking to me
And drive back to me when you’re no longer sad

Last night you held me in your arms outside your apartment building
That was a great feeling
I miss that feeling
I miss kissing you outside your door

I had had too much to drink, I didn't want to leave
You said, I'm not comfortable with you staying the night just yet
I want you to stay but there would be too much temptation
I'm drunk and you're pretty.


I like that you admited how you still have feelings for me
It was such a relief to hear
Even though I already knew
It was just comforting to hear you say it

All I have left is my faith
Everything else has been taken from me
Music and God is all I have left
Nothing else matters

When Walli walked into my life
I knew things were different
I knew I was supposed to leave this depressing city
I knew my dreams were still breathing
Alive somewhere under all my tears
I knew I had to keep pushing and not look back

It was time to turn and face the music
Become who I was called to be
I am working harder than ever for that now
God you are my every thing
My all in all
The only piece of faith I have left

Hey lost boy! It’s time to leave Neverland!
Time to own your responsibilities instead of running when things get bad
Time to clean up your act and reach for your star
Time to meet your goals and start paying attention

Hey lost boy!
Time to learn some discipline
Give up your pride, your drugs, your alcohol and incoherent ways
It’s time to grow up and face reality
It’s time to finally accept the path that God has laid out before you

Hey lost boy!
What’s your happy thought?
Do you remember how to get home?
First star to the right and head straight on till morning
It’s time to leave never Neverland
And never never look back

I feel like my life is an open book all of a sudden
Everyone knows who I am, what I am
Where I’m going and who I’m going with
This city is too small to hide in
And it makes me want to *****
Makes me want to cry, scream, throw things against the wall
But I know I have to be strong for everyone else
I feel like I can’t let anyone down
I can’t show my weaknesses
Not now, not yet
I’m not ready for that

I’ve exposed too much as it is
I’ve allowed people to know too much
I trust that they won’t exploit me
But I do not trust myself

God help me!
I need your guidance; I need your strength to be who you created me to be
I need your love and happiness to keep me going
I see my world being turned upside down!
Everything is changing so quickly!
So rapid and so unfair
I need to breathe, I need a break, I need escape
Bring me peace and confidence
Bring back the joy that once filled this empty heart

We are still breathing each other
Still sensing and knowing what the other is feeling
Still connected at the heart and mind
Clumsily reaching for the other’s hand
Knowing full well they are not there
Rolling over for a warm embrace in the middle of the night
Only to find a cold empty pillow

I do not cling to our memories in desperation
I keep them neatly folded away
And pull them out when I need to smile
They help me keep my faith
That soon we will have more wonderful adventures

We share this life, one heart, this house, one body
We share this infection, this disease and all the anger
Personal thoughts and dreams, finger-tip touches and looks
We shared more than we thought we would
More than we really wanted to
And even miles away…you still continue to share more with me than I bargained for

I’m the type to say I told you so
I’m not the one who changed, you did
I still walk the narrow road and stay true to myself
You changed for the worst
You’re someone I don’t recognize
You no longer live with a shimmering spirit
One day you are going to wake up and realize
You’re not allowed to be mad at me anymore

Just being you, you leave me breathless
Looking at your picture makes me smile
Holding your hand walking next to you
Makes my heart skip and sing
You make me sing and dance

Lying next to you makes me feel complete
Everything about you makes me happy
The wave in your hair
The way your little nose comes to a point
Your beautiful powder blue eyes
The goofy smirk you make when you’re drunk

I love how even in our distant silence
Your heart still speaks to mine
You’re still crying out for me
Still hanging on, Holding out
I only want to make you as happy as you make me

Your prose greatly outweigh your cons, you said
I adore you so much that I can’t even begin to make a list of cons
Because they are things that I can see past
Or that will change with healing and time

Your smile is the reason I get up every morning
Your smile is what keeps me going throughout the day
It's what let's me know you still care
It's that little Ray of sunshine I need on a gloomy day
The only thing that can bring me out of my dark place
Your smile is amazing