Recently,
There's been a dark cloud
Hovering over me
My mind's been provoking thunderstorms
In hopes it'll wash away the pain
Or whatever "woe is me"
That's been up with me

Recently,
It's just been dark 
I'm on edge about the future 
But I'm still deadset on the past
And mistakes that I am not anymore
All the things I was 
All the things I left behind
Came back as ghosts 
Storming my temple

As
I'm
Sitting
In 
A
Room
Alone

Appealing to my own emotions
In an ad hominem argument 
Versus my self
Or so it always goes
Me inciting thunderstorms
Before I ***** out the light

Eyes,
Hers
Don't stare
Down
My destiny
Like yours
know

Hands,  
Hers
Don't hold
Fast
My hope
Like yours
are home

Heart,
Hers
Doesn't impulse
Sync
My heartbeat
Like yours
metronomes

I feel the comfortable writhing
deep in my ***** again
I'm not sorry

This is your fault
You touched me first

Somewhere in the back of my mind
You're feeling me out

Little Miss,
Telepathic
Trespassers
will be prosecuted.

...I'll put my hands
around your neck
so softly

And choke out
the words caught
in your throat

To the tip of my tongue
     all the right things flow

To the flesh of your lips
     and all in between

resonating your body
     with stories

stranger
than
fiction

little deaths end
where they begin

can
you
feel
friction
feeling
you
up?

Just how you like
To be
shaken
and
stirred

tossed
and
over-turned

This is me unleashing
some twisted fantasy
to my little therapist
enabling me

To self-medicate with star-stuff
To "Show me what you're made of"
To "Baby, bend over and take it."

Show me the fourth wall
Let's break it.

I'm slowly starting to realize
that belief
or lack thereof
is relative to our survival

It's responsible for how far we've come
and what it took to get here

Time is just as important
It can be destructive
or constructive
relative to our
self-created path

Like our handwritten story
Starting where it ends
or does yours always
end at the start?

I'm slowly starting to realize
that the world is the canvas
and we're imitating art

I'm only grounded
When I'm *******

Or inflicting pain
on myself

This very moment
I'm racing my thoughts

to the borderline
of personality

In a self-destruction
contest

I don't play fair
when all I want to do

is feel more alive

than *******
or cutting ever did for you

underneath our skin
below the chemicals
and passed the atoms

we're vibrations,
a madness resonating for two

My life is a mess
     no metaphor
     could ever mean

My ambition
is being held captive

Lost
in the chaos of logic

Like a game of chess
    I need to be saved
    by the Queen

Wishful thinking
For divine intervention

Summoning
*The Goddess of this machine