Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Keith J Collard Nov 2012
mad, bad and dangerous to grow,
fed and sativa both,
the two I want to smoke,
and hang high on that green rope.
Keith J Collard Nov 2012
Ting, Tong--ocean is a mason--hear his chisel ring,
deep down, always erasing, with a Tong, Ting.
glassy stone is what his frothy sizzle brings.
anchor lines vibrate like heart strings.

A Ting, and a Pong, no more beloved chiselled font,
those dates gone, because the ocean is a mason,
and when I submerge into his basement,
Tong and a Ting, his craftmanship sings.

and those swings, vibrating anchor strings,
with a pong and ping, bring you to shore
his backswing, causes waves to pour,
bowing prow of windjammer rides contour.

and his distant Ting, commands the wind,
they are bellows for him, but throw your hat,
watch it come back again, a Ping and Tong,
the ocean is a mason, hear his song,
with power to rescind, nothing is gone,
throw your hat to the waves, watch it come back in.
submerge your ears// and hear the Tong and Ting.
Keith J Collard Nov 2012
After the battle done did rage,
my spoil of war, a frenchman,
I put in my basement in a cage,
this rarity I would not relinquish,
my personal love adviosr and sage.

He called me a " fatty american"
even though I was slim,
and said it was torture that
I kept bothering him.
He counted time like Louey Pasteur,
that was how he pronounced "hour."

I told him I was french in lineage,
and he said " I don't think so,
" the french are biologists,
perhaps your mother was a fungus
that grew on oak."
so I sprayed him with some water very cold,
" be nice, or you'll get the hose."

I told him, for his advice I would pay,
his currency was cow's milk from Calais,
he brightened even more after
I installed an *** tickling bidet.
and he would make, then nibble cheese,
as he was lecturing me.

" If you want the girl, you must always whisper,
and she will lean closer, and then you kiss her,"
such advice, this frenchman delivered.

We became bon amis, with each other pleased,
but he needed more than a bidet and cheese.
" You can either have a french wife,
or an oven for cooking bread,"
before I  even finished what I said,
" Oui, a bread oven I'll have instead."

So every night, I spent by his iron side,
Descarte and Victor Hugo we would recite,
" and against the british we helped you fight"
" and you still owe us money," he said calmly,
as he offered me a baget and I took a bite.

" We french, know the power
of the mushroom and the bedroom,
that is why we avoid the scuffle,
would rather marinate our truffle."
I gobbled up his words,
so sweet and sauteed,
and admired the clothes he made,
and he made me some
so I  "could get laid."

Then the news came, a peace treaty,
war and my personal frenchman were finished,
the United States were now
at war with the Finland,
" Right when we just started to begin,"
I yelled and he nodded his chin,
" What the hell am I gunna do with a Finn."

So I released the frenchman back into the wild,
crying like a mother seeing off her child,
I had to push and shove, he would not go,
but we had to part for the sake of love,
he dillied and dallied and bent low,
picking mushrooms that wild grow.
" For the sake of love, just go,"
I yelled, and threw a baget at him,
and he retreated into the woods,
and I wiped the tears from my eye,
and everytime I see frills or  fungi,
I think of that time, I had a frenchman in a cage,
and as I talk to the finn,
****** ,.it just ain't the same.
Keith J Collard Nov 2012
Blink for me stone rabbit, I know this world won't have it,
but I'm in my prism state,  subtracting a grave's chiselled dates,
and your blink, I'll equate, my stone rabbit,
to be magic, and safe in my prism state.

It will end soon, so let go of your bronze balloons,
my brother and sister cherubs pale as moon,
only through tears, your dance appears,
so let go and play-- before prismatic tears go away.

Flap in teacup bath, my still-sparrow of alabast,
to these chimes--in nature's draft,
they blot lines, as do my eyes,
on this grave-- a prism from tears are cast.

Blink for me stone rabbit, bring me some magic,
I know this world won't have it,
But in my prism state, subtracting chiselled dates,
a grille, of melting icicle--is my graveyard gate,
diffusing light like a fountain pond,
the tears running down my face--
dance cherubs to the sparrow's song,
blink for me, in locket symmetry--in stone magic--my stone rabbit.
Keith J Collard Oct 2012
" So what color are my eyes?"
they are the color of mine,
Ah yes, but a blue lake reflects my green pines,
"So whats my name?"
a name unworthy,
if not with ****** planet same,
unreachable for all who fain.
taking away the breaths
of all who came.
" So what do you do?"
I do what I did,
no longer, now that I met you.
" Smooth, so whats in my drink?"
Goddesses drink ambrosia I think,
and snapping to attention,
with a 'clink',
is eternal ice serving as your heat sink.
" Such words, sharp as your jawline."
And that is why your beauty I decline,
"Oh"
If you have me you will no longer be divine.
Keith J Collard Oct 2012
Since thy first lady declare,
that we wageth war,,
and against obesity dare,
I will hunt the fat kid,
tho he affrights me,
the first lady did knight me,
and I succeeded in the grail,
and blood marked that trail,
but popcorn spilled from his pale,
giving my hounds the scent,
downhill like a wounded lazy dear he went,
The Behemoth,
who esteemeth my sword as straw,
to sip chocolate milk,
with burps defying Queen's law.
DAGGER against my spear of poplar
is ice-cream sandwich in hand of globular,
AND THAT SANDWICH DAGGER SHALL NOT REACH FAR
BEFORE MY SPEAR UNLEASHES HIS DYING ****.
but I must admit,
I fear the headlock in his sweaty pits,
I must keep a spears distance,
away from his buttery mits,
he has vanguished many knights into that hellish abyss,

My first lady biddeth,
I will not delay, I will not tarry,
to slay the fat kid,
and hire 12 commoners to carry.
The First Lady is Michelle Obama
Keith J Collard Oct 2012
Science does not understand,
why all mammals have ***** bones,
besides Man.

Until They dug up Neanderthal woman,
and it was her in her hand.

and with a ***** more flaccid,
we have grown,
and there is no fashion,
of chicks picking ,
teeth with our ****** bone.
Next page