i wasn't always this way
i want you to know that
take it in
imagine me happy
imagine me full of life
I'm sorry that you didn't see that
I'm sorry that all you had was the destruction that i was

Slipping through my fingers like that of sand through an hourglass
The flame of life is being smothered
And it may not feel real
But i wont fall i will not open this flesh
I will hide the pain inside
Never to be seen
Until it is a scattered masterpiece of me

I cannot protect you from this
and oh how i wish i could
you will be confused
you will be angry
you will be hurt

but this is not about you baby boy
you have not done anything wrong

And when you're falling are you going to scream?
Are you going to fight the air you are rushing through?

Life hit hard that day
I realized you were gone
The pit in my stomach threatening to force it's way out

I miss you

I hear you everyday
I feel you under my skin
I dream of you

And then the harsh reality awakens with me
You are never coming home

When someone loves you
Hold onto it
Hold onto it so tight you are a white knuckle warrior
And do not let go

I will not go
I am in this
I am the warrior of the wars in your head
I am the colonel of the battle being fought
I am stoic in the bitterest of crisis
you will have to rip me from the soil i stand on
drag me away until nothing is left