This isn't some speech or even a clever play on words, more so a flow of never ending thoughts, feelings and emotions. I don't know how to explain myself or successfully display my feelings, even though these are still words but I guess analogies make a little more sense if expressed poetically. Trapped in a body where no part of it is home. Feeling the feelings of other souls. Burning my future before it comes to pass. I'm no poet and I'm not exctly sure if this is even a poem. But my mind can't stop. I force my hands deep into the soul of the world bringing back, in my fist, a heart that isnt beating. Just as cold as I and at last I've found my soulmate..the irony, I have not a soul. Just a corpse. Lifeless but somehow I'm living. These cuts in my arms keep appearing, sharp objects keep digging. Mind ****** back to the beginning, childhood is never-ending. I'm stuck. But this isn't really meant to be a poem. I'm not sure it is at all. I'm just speaking what I know I don't understand, but is all too well understood. I really don't know what I said exactly just some ******* that came to mind. It may make sense or it may not. But hey, who's to say that the mind actually knows what its thinking?

Love Lust Lies Pain Anger and Frustration. How does these things have any connection? Many people would say that they dont, but little do they know.

"i love you" something that is heard very often, but has lost soooo much meaning. Saying "i love you" now ah days is code for :

i will hurt you..

or

im gonna use you..

People have become smart. They have learned what to say. When to say it. And how to say "i love you" to get what they want. People LIE about LOVE to cover up the LUST that they have for the other person. The love isnt emotional.. but its physical. When this becomes apparent, the other person is hurt which causes PAIN which later turns to FRUSTRATION. All of the LIES that are being told. Secrets and double lives. Why put soooo much more effort into hiding things from people then just puttin enough effort into being loyal? All of these things, in the end, turns to ANGER.

People become angry with the other person. Later, angry with themselves for believing the LIES and being blind to the truth. Future relationships have just gotten harder to handle and to deal with because now.. people think that anyone they talk to will just LIE to them just like the previous person in their life did.

So.. does these things have a connection?

they very much do.

"i love you" has gained a new meaning.

gained a new understanding..

&& is no longer something bright and delightful..

but something dark and stressful..

-kc