Maybe you never really
Loved me,
Something tells me that if you did,
You would've at least
Had the nerve to call.

Life moves on
But I'm just stuck here with
Everything swirling around me.
You seem fine now and
To the naked eye,
So would I .

But a part of me expected-wanted- you,
To know better,
To know that I was still hurting,
With all of this chaos
All I needed was a constant,
I thought that was you.

Since you've gone away,
I lie in bed
Remembering what it felt like
To have you by my side,
Thinking up rhymes and phrases
Because I can't sleep and
When I do drift awake,
My memories and words have all gone away.

Since you've gone away,
My smile isn't me and
I can no longer write or
Just sit and be happy.
The sun feels like a forbidden place
Because that used to be a spot for
Just you and me.

I want to tell myself I'm okay.
But I can't keep pretending
And living life this way,
I just want you back,
But you're better off without,
                                                  Measly Old Me.

Maybe this is over,
And it just wasn't the right time,
But I have no regrets.

I thought it might last,
Forever,
But that's the thing about relationships,
You never really know.

But I was happy,
And I think for a little while,
So were you.
I smiled the whole time.
I wanted some other things and
I guess it just didn't work out,
But when I said I loved you,
I really meant it darling,
And I still do.
All I ever wanted and everything I needed
Was in you.

But if there was one thing
That you taught me
That no one else knew it
Was to keep my head up,
So I'll smile the whole time.

I don't want to be
Frail & confused.
Laying in a hospital bed,
Just waiting for it all to end,
Knowing there are greater things,
Waiting for me.

I just don't want to be,
Another elderly patient to
Poke & feed.
I don't want to be laying there
In my head,
Wishing for the end.

I don't want my
Loved ones to see me like that,
All small & broken.

I miss you.
Every hour that we don't talk,
Or that I'm awaiting your reply,
Feels like days.
I don't even know where we stand anymore.

I just want to know that you will
Always be there,
But I feel you,
Drifting away.
Maybe it's too much to ask. But,
I love you,
Do you still feel the same?

You say you do,
But, sometimes there's a
              Hesitation in your voice,
                          A crick in your smile,
                                       And I don't know if you do.
I don't think I can handle
Being torn away from you.
Why would you be dangled in front of me,
Only to
             Vanish?
To show me what could have been?
Because I don't want the dream,
I want the reality.
Maybe I'm not ready,
Maybe you aren't either,
Maybe we just aren't right.
But when you hold me,
I finally feel
                     Home.

When we're together,
The sun seems to shine a little brighter
And time is only a figment of our imagination-
The world stands still for a little while
And I don't want it to start moving again-
I'm afraid I might lose my balance,
Begin to fall and
There will be no one there to
Catch me.

Why if they feel so distant
from me,
if I'm only just a half,
do I feel so very close to them,
so close as to have their names
tattooed on my wrist,
where I can always see them and
remember what they mean to me,
but somehow, the meaning doesn't
transcend.
I'm just an
Afterthought

This is really the end,
for you and him.
My heart aches for you.

I'm sorry and scared but I really can't say a word.
I don't want to make it worse.
I just want to help you heal,
but I know there's not much I can do.
It really just comes down to you.

I hope you can be happy,
and that you don't feel like I'm leaving you
behind but some pains, just can't be mine.

I've tried to save you just as much as I can,
but there are only so many times that I can be
your superman.
It hurts me to say
but it's not my job to take on all of your pain.
I'm sorry it hurts,
but my heart is just too heavy.

We knew this day would come,
where we had both had enough,
just please remember that I love you,
and need to see a glimpse of you in my life,
It's okay.

Sometimes I wish the six years had been a dream,
so you wouldn't have to feel the pain,
but I can't take it away this time,
You have to be your own Superman.

Somehow,
You understand me,
You don't judge me & I can tell you anything & everything,
without it shocking you or changing your opinion,
You still say, "I love you"
And I believe it.
Call me silly.

But I don't understand how someone like you,
so perfect,
so beautiful,
understanding & amazing,
would want a girl like me.

With all of my flaws,
my imperfections,
And my seemingly endless amount of scars.
You still just hold me & kiss away the pain,
in a way that no one else
ever could.

But why me?
Why would you want me?
Measly me
I think that you deserve better,
but you say you want me!
And the heart wants,
what the heart wants...
<3