I like to think of my body as a jewelry box. After all, it does contain my heart of gold.

You’ve got to find your happiness.

Happiness is stubborn,
It does not want to be found.

It will not come to you in the form of a sweet boy with big brown eyes.
It will not come to you in the form of money.
It will not come to you in the form of possessions.
It will not come to you, at all.

But if you search for it,
It will never be found.

The only way to find this thing you long for
Is to be other’s happiness.
Even if it is only for a second.

Share a smile with a stranger.
Hold the door for people, no matter how many keep coming.
Give up something of yours to someone less fortunate.
It may not be all that great to you,
But it will be beyond special to them.

Just be a decent person and do some decent things.
It is a pity that simple things like these have become out of the ordinary,
I guess it just makes them all the more special.

The smiles that these simple acts of kindness bring,
Is where you will find your happiness.

About five months ago
I couldn’t imagine life without you

I looked at you as the greatest thing to have happened to me

I looked at you through my young, innocent eyes
And i never would have thought
Even for a second
That you could bring any harm to me

You had me blinded
Totally oblivious to the fact that this love was not at all what it seemed

I have held on for so long
Hoping and wishing
That things would change

I thought that if I just kept trying
Just kept giving my all
That we would be okay
That you would always be by my side
That our love would grow stronger

I thought wrong

You see, in the past few weeks
I have allowed myself to realized some things
I have stopped defending you from my own thoughts
I have let my instincts take over
And they have told me all I need to know

You never loved me as you said you did
You may have loved me
But you never loved the parts of me that mattered

You did nothing but leave bruises
On my confidence
On my trust
On my heart

This love is toxic, causing nothing but damage

It feels so good to say
I don’t want it anymore

I do not need someone who doesn’t need me
I do not need someone who dismisses my feelings
I do not need someone who isn’t completely in love with every single part of my soul
I do not need someone who gives me half of the effort I give them

I do not need you

You are not my happiness as you once were
You are only someone who has taught me a few great lessons

I will never again allow myself to be taken advantage of
I will never again let down my walls for someone without knowing their intentions
I will never again listen to words I know are lies, and continue to stick around

Never again

The ideas of people around me have been drilled into my head from when I was young

They were forced upon me and I had no idea there were other ways of seeing things

I would get so angry seeing people
Drink
Smoke
Be openly homosexual
Anything I had been told was wrong

But as I’ve gotten older
I’ve realized things aren’t always black and white
Some things are undoubtedly gray to me

I have formed many of my own opinions

As I try to express my views time and time again
I am told I don’t know what I’m talking about
I’m young
I can’t possibly have my own way of looking at things
That is not allowed

They need to realize I’m not the same little kid anymore
I’m not as naïve or easily convinced

I am a young individual
Who has seen my fair share in my short time on earth

It is natural for my beliefs to change as I continue to grow
Things are constantly changing
And that is okay

It is not okay for them to make me feel as though my thoughts are irrelevant

I do not need to believe everything they tell me

And neither do you

Be your own person

Think your own thoughts
You are not meant to think the same as everyone else

Please, please remember that

Showing emotion does not make me weak
Being scared does not make me immature

Don’t you dare try to tell me that I am “weak minded”
Don’t you dare try to make me feel like these things are my fault

Do you think I asked to feel everything so deeply?
Do you think I asked to be put in these situations?

You say I keep things too bottled up
That it annoys you
That you’re sick of it

I say “im sorry”

I cannot help these voices in my head
Telling me no one cares
That I would only be burdening others with my problems
I cannot help fearing that these things are true

I am not sorry for how I am

I am sorry that you feel the need to criticize
And pick
At everything I am

I am the one who should be annoyed
I am the one who should be sick of it

You seem to think
That the way you see and do things
Is the only way

I am not the one who is “weak minded”
That, would be you

It’s about time I start loving myself

The scars that cover my body, making me look worn
The way my face wrinkles when i'm really smiling
My imperfect, pale skin that turns red from being in the sun too long
The waves and curls in my hair that never seem to cooperate
My tendency to laugh at things that aren’t at all funny
My desire to be different
The caring nature that I was blessed with
The passion that has been planted in my heart for the things I love

All of it

I am going to love every single aspect
Of my heart
Of my mind
And of my body

Because I am beautifully and wonderfully made
And it’s about **** time I start believing it

I think what hurts the most is the promises. The promises that you made me, the promises that I made you, and all the promises that come with knowing someones secrets. Promises are dangerous, because if they aren't kept the word "promise" loses its meaning entirely. Then what can you say? "I mean it?" "I'll follow through with what I said?" "I wont let you down?" You could, but they are just synonyms. You change the words, but you cant change the meaning, making them just as dangerous. Lets make a rule, a number one rule that everyone has to follow. The rule is, do not make a promise unless you will be able to fulfill it. Easy. Can you imagine how many hearts that would save from breaking?