And I guess my problem is that I was always taught how to love but not to stop.
So losing you was like losing everything, and I can't stop this feeling in my heart.

I am afraid if I open myself up that my secrets will not stop pouring out.
Why am I so afraid of becoming a river?
What mountain made me feel shame?

You are oxygen
And I'm dying to breathe.

I used to look at you like you put the stars in the sky,
But now I realize all you did was put a blind fold on me that had stars on the inside.

Another night of blankly staring at the ceiling.
I guess it's better than dreaming of you.

I always find myself thinking about you.
Even if I don't mean to.
I could try writing about the seasons and how beautiful they are or how they are forever changing, but I know I'd end up with something hinting at you.
About how I was lonely in the spring, fell for you in the summer, lost you in fall, and let go in the winter.
I write about you because I can't actually tell you how I feel.
So the paper in my journal feels it instead.
Because if I tried to tell you, it just wouldn't come out the same.
How I can't sleep when the smell of you still lingers on my sheets.
How I stopped listening to my music on shuffle because all the songs remind me of you.
How I can't look at pictures of your face because I picture myself next to you still.
How I struggle not picking up the phone to call you when something good or bad happens to me.
How I sit in the shower and wait for the aching to stop before I get out and have to face the world again, alone.
And how I used to laugh at girls that would be love sick over a guy.
But darling, I would give up everything to hear you say, "I miss you and love you too."
Do you see what I mean?
You find your way back into my words, back into my thoughts.
The seasons are changing now, and so are you.
You're still gone.
And I'm still here.

He guessed my favorite color on the first try.

But between me and you...
I didn't even have a favorite color until he softly said "blue?"
When he looked up at me and smiled,
I told him he was right.
And ever since then I have never seen blue the same way.
It's all I can see.