In a pool of water we wade
Sun on our shoulders
Trickling through our fingers
Gracing our cheeks
Feeling devine
From our heaven above
Yet we fear the rain

In the storm of sailing uncertainty
All in our own boat
Riding our storm out
Light is in the distance
Blurred and faint light
Edging closer
Towards the shore
The end of the monstrosity
Of waves, of devastation
Light seems nearer
Then lost again in the clouds
And the fog
And the crashing waves
The wreckage on the shore
Too much to fathom
Restoration is an unseen miracle
Yet the light is near
Having faith
Gathering of souls
Celebration and gratefulness
Realization of what was lost in the wreckage
Rebuilding our boat
On to a new destination  
To better clear skies
And calm seas

Involuntary pain and sensation
The emotional suffering of its goodbye
Too chronic to articulate
Seeing is not believing they mixed up the words
Hanging on like my limb
Pain in my heart, empty of blood
I am cognitive but confused and euphoric
I feel it, yet missing
I see the hallucination of oneself
Trauma to the heart
I feel it. Yet missing
The phantom pain
You are gone but I still feel the pain

How clever is she
Paintdrops fall
Clothes inside out
How clever is she
Pretty scarves adorn
Scars inside out
How clever is she
Sunshine hair
Distracts her pain
How clever is she
Pretty in pink
Always the brave one
How clever is she
Smile that can stop you in your tracks
Smile inside out
How clever is she
Pink is her color of cancer
Inside out

I have sometimes been
wildly,
despairingly,
acutely, miserable.
But through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

We are sisters as such,
Elbow to elbow,
Knee to knee.
They call her Maddie and Sammie is she.

My eyes are of dark,
And hers are of blue.
Maddies got the brains in her head,
Sam's the one with sand in her shoe.

I am goofy and fearless,
Always ready to shout.
The Sam that I am
Cuz why fit in when you are born to stand out.

I'm 9 and I'm Maddie.
I wonder and think and my thoughts are in tact.
I'm smart and I'm cautious.
But remember  life' s a great balancing act.

Our dads' name is Joe Shmoe
He's a wonderful dad,  this is truer than true.
Cuz there's noone alive
That is youer than you.

I see you on the other side.
You are in my secret garden
The key unlocks the door
You hold the key that fits
Fits our souls.
Holds us together.
I looked for you
In another lifetime
I waited hoping to find you
I thought it would be so simple
Love is complicated
Our souls were a mural on the other side of my secret garden.
I wait a lifetime for the key that fits the door.
I finally found you.
The mural blurs.
And finally you place that key in my hand.

I am blinded by water
So many words I cannot see.
I keep writing.
Flows.
Like water.
Stings, not from salt.
But from pain.
Flowing all the pain out.
Stayed there forever it seems.
I dont need to see to know what is there.
I am blinded by my tears.

The wind blows my hair,
blows through my soul,
blows my worries, sorrows and fears for that moment.
I close my eyes and feel tranquil.
It is peaceful the wind, in its own loudness.
The wind gales come and stop abrubtly,
like taking a short nap.
Winds come again like whispers from angels,
air from their wings.
Angels are amongst me,
I cannot see them,
I cannot feel them,
yet I know they are there.
It is my escape to nature.
I open my eyes to the rippling of water.
Pure peace, unthreatening.
Sun shines on the water like stained glass,
dangling crystals over the water.
I feel an inner peace I could not achieve in my own mind.
I am one soul.
A lost soul.
Searching for a place of peace within myself.
If only to feel this peace for eternity I would find my soul.
One of purpose, of meaning, of desire, of true happiness, fullfilment and hope.

What a sad feeling,
Of summer days passed,
Breath on the windows now,
Winds blowing and unraveling of the leaves,
Shades of orange,
Chilliness in the air,
Breathing in the scent of autumn's time,
And remembering summer days passed.

I am fully clothed,
Yet he undresses me with his thoughts.
Intoxicating thoughts.
I am drunk in it.
He is haunted by my seductive fragrance.
Silence.
Speaking would be too simple.

I drive through that place up the road.
The leaves on the trees
The smell of fallen leaves
And sweet sadness.
I drive down the road and it is endless
Like my thoughts.
That song plays over and over in my head.
I hear it today and it always reminds me
Of sweet sadness.
I smell the fallen leaves.
I open my eyes
And all I see is snow.

Each page,
Their beauty.
Inescapable
Impeccable beauty.
Standing the test of time
Some of the innocent.
Some no beauty at all.
Beauty beyond words,
Beyond speech,
Smiling from within or for the camera.
Does she want to be beautiful?
Is it really her.
Who could she be or want to be
If not for the cameras eye to see.

Sometimes I wake up
Crying out your name
No happy ever after
Please tell me you're not real
Sometimes i wake up screaming out your name
Do I adore you
Sometimes I wake up
Crying out your name
I remember when you were mine

I close my eyes for deep slumber.
There he appears.
No winged Angel.
He is but real.
Crooked smile.
Eyes on me.
I want to reach out and touch him.
I do.
We kiss, pure bliss.
The sweet taste.
Sweetness.
Can you taste in your sleep?
Pure heaven
I wake up.
I am alone.
He is not there.
My mouth tastes sweet.

So salty
Sometimes sweet
Can be joy
can be sadness
Holding so much inside a single drop
Each has a meaning
So clear and sometimes cloudy
Depends upon  the joy or sorrow

Do you think of me,
Tell me truly,
Do you dance with me,
Are the violins playing in the air,  
Do you think of me,
Do you dance with me everywhere,  
Are the the flurries falling,
Field of white,
This is the sound of voices,
Do you think of me,
This is the sound of all your love,
Do you think of me,
Song for all to hear,
Dance with me in the wind,
Just pretend that you are here,
Visions of you,
Do you think of me.
Restless thoughts tonight ,
Footprints on my mind,
Morning light see so clearly,
Within my soul,
Tell me truly,
Do you think of me..

Gambling fool
The self righteous
Poisoned interior
Psychological warfare
Deal with the devil
Everyone grieves you
Yet you are alive
Living, dying, living, dying
Always searching for the neon color
Russian roulette
Bang, you're gone

Blood is the color red.
Evil and fire.
Love and lust.
Rebirth and Jesus.
Danger and anger.

Blood is the color of red of war.
For many who have lost their lives.
And shed blood for freedom.
Blood represents death.

Blood is the color of red running through our veins.
Blood shows no prejudice
Regardless of our skin color
All blood is still the same.

Blood is the color of red cloth.
The killing in the suberbs.
Shows your race.
The slang of gangs.

Blood is the color of red in red wine.
Our grapes of wrath.
Fermenting and full bodied.
The smell of wickedness.

Blood is the color of  red in our love and our passion.
Of St. Valentine.
Of our hearts and our mind.
Days of remembrances.

Blood is the color  of red in  " blood red lipstick".
Attracts us humans through love and lust.
Steals our innocence.
Robs our purity.

Blood is the color of red of Jesus Blood.
It keeps the body of Christ alive.
Brings cleansing to the soul.
Is the rebirth and resurrection.

Blood is a primary color.

Silly little girls of youth.
With their perky little perfect *******.
Narrow hips and smooth skin.
They look in the mirror and see all their insecurities.
Fantasies about all their lovers to come.
They brag to their friends and feel nothing inside.
But we are the pleasure seekers.
Creatures of seduction.
We brag to our lover
How they race our mind with desire
Turn our lust into reality
Slow our hearts into love.
We are the pleasure seekers.
Our bodies are full and ripe.
We are women
No silliness
Pure honesty
No hidden agenda
Here for pleasure
Not for heartache or pain
No facade of who we aren't
We are the pleasure seekers.
Not needing affirmation in the mirror
The mirror shines back our reflection
Of beauty
Lines only we see
The pleasure is not all ours but our lovers'.
Physical looks not of importance
Its a spiritual existence now
Out of our body of imperfection
Only our lover sees the perfection
We are the pleasure seekers.
We are the women of lovers.

Waves rolling like tears.
Reaching the shore and flooding me.
Tides in and out.
Like emotions in my heart.
Stay here with me sweet sea.
So I may feel the cleansing of your beauty
on my feet.
Washing away the hurt.
But seeing the clearness of your water.
Salt of your water, like salt of my tears.

Time too short for the living.  Too long for the dying.
Time heals all pain, they say. But never really goes away.
Time changes with the seasons.  A season of intervals.
Time is dark to light.
Time is a mystery.
Time is somewhere you have to be.
Time is a second, a minute, an hour.
Time is infinity.  The duration.  An instant.
A time warp in the matrix.
Time is a phase in your life.
Time cannot be measured.
Too much time on your hands.
And in the end, there is never enough time.

twenty wiggley toes,
twenty mischievious fingers,
four active legs,
four swinging arms,
four wandering eyes,
four listening ears,
two perky noses,
two pouty lips,
two hungry stomachs,
two learning brains,
two loving hearts that beat to my own,
two loving souls that could have been one,
two beautiful children that I love a ton.

I look in the mirror and see not myself but the person I once knew.
I have become old.
Tired.
Withered.
Like a piece of driftwood someone picks up on the shore of the ocean and throws back into the sea.

River rising waterbound,
Plains afield on the other side,
Mountains wild,
Hysteria on a winters field,
Rusty water on a cold cold night,
Waterbound can't beholden,
Rising sun on the rivers edge
Rolling water arising,
In fields a rolling,
Might as well be dreaming,
Waterbound.

No sound
Color of white
Invisible spectrum of light
Unseen but heard
Whiring in my head
Like a clear, muted dream
Pastels of white
My thoughts are fading
No ethereal presence
Simple white noise
No interruption of dreams
The universe getting smaller and smaller
Slumber is near
No sound
Just white noise

Who are you?
That demon in my head.
Fear always there.
That dresser in front of my door.
Locking you out.
What a waste.
You took so much.
Gave back so little.
You say you are forgiven.
By whom may I ask.

That girl you never forget.
Smile that could pause a room.
So simple yet not plain.
She laughs with her head back.
Laughter is easy.
But alone is the time she fears.
So lucky is she.
To be liked.
Taking for granted her face.
Her admiration.
Wrapped in self pity.
Asking what is her purpose.
Shame on you.
Having so much.
Effortless beauty.
Selfless love.
Genorous spirit of time and effort.
Write about me she asks.
Not enough lines on a page.

dynamic balance in our lives,
chilliness from the heavens,
and warmth from the earth,
the harmony and the beat,
familiar similarities but somehow different,
you receive my creativity,  nonconformed
the seasonal solctice and the equinox,
you see me as black but I am monochromatic white.

In a sea of people I search for you.
I have seen you in so many ways and have loved you in all of them.
I have stepped on pebbles and rocks to reach you.
You are the reason I breath, until I am breathless.
I reach out my finger to the universe and you are within my reach.
My finger ripples the universe piercing the surface of this reality.
Not my imagination this feeling.
Time makes no disappearance of my emotion.
I have said aloud you are my soul mate.
Put it to words on paper.
Endless semicolons.
My past is a whirlwind of pain, and regrets.
Yet the present has come.
My search is no longer in continuum.
All my doubts have come to fruition.
My epiphany has blinded me.

oh forget me nots in my shaded woodland garden,
hibiscus of rememberance,
violet of the lavendars of my faithfullness,
iris of his wisdom and valour,
daisys of my white imagination,
heathers of my heart,
roses of his desire,
sweet pea of delicasies,
ivy of my eternal fidelity,
posies I desire,
he loves me, he loves me not.