kalisey

kalisey Sep 9

Why do we get stuck in the past?
Why can't there be a move on point in life where all of your past mistakes and promises fall from your mind.
Why do I spend every morning and night over-analyzing the past as if it changes anything.
The way you overcome the past is to fight it head to head.
The past is haunting, but that doesn't mean the present and future will be.
"will be" those two words should give every individual hope in life.
today will be..
tomorrow will be..
don't let the past haunt you.
yesterday is gone tomorrow is unknown so you should just live the day.

the past is my biggest fear. this past month I have learned slowly how to overcome it in my own way... so shall you

kalisey Sep 5

notes

my trouble is I analyze life instead of living it.
I recognize that I live now and only now, and I will do what I want to do THIS moment and not what I decided was best for me yesterday.
next time I will...
from now on I will...
what makes me wiser today than I was yesterday?

kalisey Sep 3

I AM WHAT I AM

"I will be what I will be"-but I am now what I am, and here is where I will spend my energy.
today I will work in rhythm with myself and not with what I 'should be"
I AM WHAT I AM
"I will be what I will be" what's the anxiety in that?
it is enough that I am off value to someone today.
it is enough that I make a difference now.
"what do I want to do in life?" "what is my purpose?" my assumption is that I have a reason for living, that my life has a direction. but maybe we are not moving in one direction any more than history. the assumption that I am heading toward something makes me want to justify my past actions and plan out the future. the reason I don't want to drive,wait in line, run errands,etc., is that in the back of my mind I beleive I have a destiny and that therefore this mundane task is a waste of my time because it does not contribute to the "important work" I have to do before I die.
the way for me too live is to have no way at all.

I am what I am and you nor anyone else can change that.

kalisey Aug 29

To my best friend:

To my best friend,
I give my heart.
I give you my soul.
I give you everything that makes me, me.
I give you my dreams.
But you are a nightmare.
your MY nightmare.
I used to be afraid of things like you.
things that take the good parts and eat them alive like a bear.
but now I only see my best friend.
my nightmare.
And instead of being afraid, I miss my nightmares.

To my best friend... you took every part of me and crushed it. but I love you more than myself and I would do anything too see you again.

kalisey Aug 28

is that all I am?

a pretty face too look at across the room?
a familiar face too lean apon?
a slimy **** of a girl too giggle and laugh at with your knife faced friends?
a ****? is that what i am to you.
because if so I think you are a disgusting.
unsightly.
agonizing.
unbelievable excuse for a person.
I think you belong in the deep depths of disappear where you live for eternity if that is all I am.

"deep depths of disppear" last little bit quoted from Anne of green gables.

kalisey Aug 28

I miss you.

i miss you,
I miss you when I wake up.
I miss you when I eat breakfast knowing its not yours.
I miss you when Im walking into school knowing you didn't drop me off.
I miss you at lunch because I know you didn't pack it for me.
I miss you when Im on the bus home because I know I'm not going too arrive too your big smile and a bear hug.
I miss my mom.

it has been 4 months since I've seen my moms face. I don't remember what she looks like anymore or her beautiful voice that I took for granted when I saw her last.
I love you mom.
I miss you.

kalisey Aug 24

These days

I have been out searching.
I don't do much talking these days.
these days.
these days I seem to think a lot about the things forced to be forgotten
and I wonder if i'd see that spot again.
please don't confront me with my failures.
I have not forgotten them, even these days...
these days.

I listened too this song today, not once but a few times and after about the 15th time I decided too go too the lyrics and I read every single word. so I decided too turn those words and make them into my own characterized poet. hope you enjoy, I like too sing it personally.

#days