I've gotten over it.
It has all been said and done.

I tied a bandanna tightly around my neck.
I tried to **** myself.
My phone buzzed.
I reached.
The knots untied themselves.
And now, I am still here.

I've forgotten, or at least have gotten over it.
Now, it's everyone else's turn.

My eyes hurt.
My nose burns.
And my head throbs with things once forgotten.
I wanted so ******* badly to forget.

And now, I'm forced to relive it.

I tried to ******* **** myself.
Why would you bring that up again?
Why would you ask me why?
How?
When?
It makes me remember when I'd already lost it.

I can't pay attention to the things that should matter
To a fifteen year old girl.

I can't just daydream about kissing my boyfriend or
Stress over the coming math test.

Because I'm too busy killing myself with memories.

I am falling apart...
I am ******* falling apart.
Everything has gone wrong.

You find out, yell at me,
Keep me caged in.
And now I can't think at all.

I didn't do my assignment.
I didn't even know I had it!
And before that, I got every question wrong.

I don't even care anymore.
This comes first.
And plus, a few assignments won't affect me too much.
The tests though...

But it is simple.
I know the numbers,
I know the properties.

But what I don't know is how to ******* fix myself.

I can't control you and I can't make you
LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!!!!!!

I can't fix this.
And I can't run.

I have too much to lose.

I need you to do a job for me.
Satisfy me in the way only you can.

I've craved your touch day and night,
And I know how it feels to have your lips
On my body.
The feeling, the memory is engraved in my brain.

But I need more.

Do this job for me,
And I will pay you back in any way I can.

Karma is a *****.
You heard the saying so many times.
What goes around comes around.
The golden rule.
Whatever.

Karma is a *****.
But not to the people who deserve it.
The people who were the nice ones,
Who have  been suffocated;
Their payment is long overdue.
I know a lot of people, including myself,
That have struggled to be kind for so long.
They have completely possessed the person
They once were.


Lately I've been a *****.
Please forgive me.

Ive tried for so long.
And I can not deal with this anymore.
I feel the need to rebel.
Because it is something to do.

You would do it to.
And most likely have
If you have been as caged in
As I was.