the world w∆s so much d∆rker for me
h∆ven't h∆d ∆ shed of light for such ∆ long time
never h∆d the ∆ppetite to even take ∆ bite out of the food i loved
the world w∆s so much d∆rker, until you

you g∆ve my life colors i thought i would never see ∆g∆in
you g∆ve me∆ning into every morning i woke up from
ever since you ∆rrived, everything i wrote ∆bout w∆s ∆bout you
∆nd i'm thankful for ∆ll the d∆ys i'd get to spend with you
even if it's ∆ll fleeting
even if it's just for ∆ while

to me, now, everything is ∆bout you.

maintain your innocence for as long as you possibly can

the world is a horrible place

the ebony sky looks lovely tonight.
the moonlight brings radiance to your somber expression.
turning your deep frown into a delightful smile.
"you look enchanting" i exhaled.
your pale complexion glowed into a rubescent glee.
my heart rose to my throat upon seeing your lovely smile.
gazing above the starry night, your eyes and heart stricken with awe.
but my eyes were glued to you, an amazing being, covered with the alluring embrace of the cosmos.

it's somehow poetic.
how the world burns with passion
amidst the ******* that everyone does.
streaks of gold of all the fuckery people consume through their everyday lives.

some find good in bad people, an altruistic ruse of a *******.
some find bad in good people, creating jealousy of lowlife *******.
the world's turning to ****.

the world will burn, with ashes as soft as the gentle falling snow.
the stars will crash down upon our God forsaken earth.
say your prayers before going to hell, you selfish *******.

worship the flame for the end of days.
incarcerate yourself, shackle your soul to the embers of doomsday.
say your goodbyes to the people you hold dear.
you will soon be one with the stars.
an everlasting being.

You've made a home in me, and you never even realized.
You've loosened the gates of my heart, broken lock and key.
The gentle touch of your kiss felt like the morning sun, new and pure.
The air around you, like the sweet new year breeze, a fresh beginning.
You've made a home in me, made me yours and you never even realized.

another day of bliss and wonder, wishing for it in every waking moment.
nocturnal, sleepless, but hoping and dreaming for when We could ever meet.
nectars of sweet beauty, spring arise Your radiant air, an amazing being.
justice, as You've now saved Me, with Me denying how I see things as it is.
everlasting regret, as I am but a confused little boy.
lifting up the deep sadness from within My soul, You are a river of great depth, flowing in My bloodstream with Your alluring smile.
You saved Me from Myself, or maybe I've been lying to Myself about it, and that I'm the only one who looks at it that way.

In another life.
My self wouldn't be a prisoner of his own regret.
He would've lived his life filled with dreams.
Wouldn't be shackled by the heavy weight of the world.
He'd be in France, exploring the lovely scenery of the things I could never fathom to see.
Maybe he'd be chasing his dreams of becoming a musician.
Touring all over the world with his head held high.
Singing the songs I'd made when I was still young and naïve.
Hearing about the world through the eyes of another.

Maybe in another life, I wouldn't have suffered like this.
I wouldn't be burdened by my own regrets, my wrong doings etched in my whole being.
Now, I only carry the sadness, the anger, the loss, all the hurt that my other selves have felt.
I will carry the burden of all the Me's that's ever existed, in every other universe.

Maybe in another life, I wouldn't be who I am.
I can only pray for them and their happiness.

the branches of life
the leaves of desperation
the relentlessly dead buzzards
and the meaning of it all
clenching the teeth of each root
heart wrenching lives, long gone
clinging on what little they can
with all these fluttering feelings of insanity
one day, you'll become someone you've most hated

Oh to write about death.
The sweet surrender of the lost self.
Like a shadow cast against the light, I am but a nothing in this world of everything.
Should I come to terms with my self-hatred, I would do everything in my power to end my life.
The solemn activist of my own will.
I do not deserve to live.
This is a letter for me, should I still be alive after the 25th of April 2022.
Hold on to your anger.
Hold on to your self-loathing.
**** yourself, again and again, if given the chance.

chew your food properly
don't let anything go to waste
as smacks ring across the table
i scold you for chewing too loudly

we bicker and we fight
for something so trivial like leaving
screaming like two tigers
with harsh words filling the dark and empty room

hold onto your words properly
don't let anything go to waste
for i've poured too much of the love you can't promise me
as we let go of our final goodbyes